i think this is left over from dubdays, dunno.
when i need to be assertive i fizzle out.
my husband was furious when he came home.
For me, it really was worth making 'a fuss' about. Many things I let go (like your situation). I think I am too laid back sometimes. This is about my HOME(S), my family, my life.
JWDaughter, sounds like you really went through a lot with that real estate transaction. Your right though, it is easier to be assertive when it directly affects our family's. I need to overcome some deep rooted fears. Gotta dig them up and throw them away.
i think this is left over from dubdays, dunno.
when i need to be assertive i fizzle out.
my husband was furious when he came home.
Sorry, I tried to help. I guess you need to have your man, straighten them boys out.
Philip
lol...Kiss off you smelly old elder lover
my mom called tonight to tell me that she got disfellowshipped!!!!.
of course to me this is like the greatest news ever and to her its the worst ever so i'm seriously having a hard time being sympathetic.
i just know this could mean she's out for good and it definately means i've got my mom back.
{{{{{{Renee}}}}}}}}
Maybe this will be the beginning of your parents freedom. Keep us up to date. Sometimes it takes 2 steps forward and 1 back for awhile.
Love~Kate
would you apologize in writing to your children for raising them in the truth?
i've apologized verbally........ none of them is going to meetings any longer...... my husband and i have been drifting away for several years..... .
i was raised a witness, and thought we were doing the right thing.
I apologized verbally many times but actually did it in writing tonight. I had a family birthday party here today and spent some time with my daughter. She has some obvious mental health issues that she is not dealing with so after she left I wrote an email letter to her.
Sometimes the apology isn't enough, I have to try to fix the damage done. She is my firstborn and got the worst of it even though I did not force meetings on her, nor did I ever make her go out in service. I was a sick neurotic mother from being raised a dub and still believed 100% it was "the truth" until she was 12. She did go to a private dub school and some meetings.
It's hard because on one hand I want to explain why I was such a bitch, on the other I don't want to make excuses but own it. It's all very heartbreaking. I wish we got do-overs. I'd gladly give my life to give her hers back. What her life could have been had she had the unconditional love and nurtering she deserved.
do you still pray?
how are your prayers different now that you're not a jw?
what do your prayers involve?
Prayer is the most important aspect of my life. Talking to the Creator, asking His guidance, thanking Him for this awesome life, brings me the greatest joy and peace. He is not the god of the Watchtower.
Here is an incredible book I am reading; "The G.O.D. Experiments: How Science Is Discovering God in Everything, Including Us"
Schwartz, Gary, E. / pages
He is a proffesor at U of A. You can download it as an ebook for $7 at SimonSays.com This book documents proof of God, and one scientist's experience with communicating with him on a scientific level.
i think this is left over from dubdays, dunno.
when i need to be assertive i fizzle out.
my husband was furious when he came home.
I have a serious problem and I am going to really work on it. I made those 2 boys come back. I explained AGAIN what we agreed on. Again they did a crappy job. They ended up getting $19 an hour a piece instead of $20 and I still have a yard full of rocks!
What I learned from this experience is; I don't have a backbone. Just when I think I am so over dubjunk I realize that may not be so. Where do I even start? How come so many of you come out fiesty and assertive? I've been out over a decade now but have made little progress in this area.
just curious as to what difficulties have faced people dating as an ex jw.
myself, i have noticed the glazed over look in a guy's eyes when you try to explain why your family doesn't celebrate the holidays with you etc.
new to this board, so if this has been well covered before, please forgive me.
For me there were major trust issues. I was so gullible too. I picked the wrong man over and over because I believed them. (no offense guys I know you don't all lie, especially ex JWs, they've had thier fill of lies) I finally had to list a set of standards and make myself hold a date up to them, and verify everything. I spent 5 years deliberatly not dating at all because I did not trust myself.
The time alone was the best thing I could have done. I learned that I can trust and depend on myself. I don't need a man. I bought my ranch had my first very own sancuary. One Valentines Day 2004 I felt a twinge of lonelyness and dated a guy who lived up to my standards. We were married before the year was done and have been very happy.
We may be a bit eccentric but are a good match. If he gets moody (men can be worse than a woman on PMS) I just go do my thing, no drama. I love my independance. No co-dependancy crap. His family on the other hand...they will never get it nor do they seem to care to try. They are very nice people, not eccentric.
My husband is a little person and I think this is why we make such a good match. He does not understand the JW experience but he sure understands suffering and being a social outcast.
i've decided to cut my ties with jws.. i don't post here much as i've stated before, but you all don't realize how much i appreciate this forum and the support it gives..
Good for you! That is not an easy decision to make. I always have believed that it benifits us in the long run to live, speak, and walk in authentic truth no matter what happens. Some just can't leave the JWs for family reasons and have to hide their true self which is so sad and I imagine conflicting and frustrating.
Life only gets better after leaving. May have some real rocky paths to walk but your not on it alone.
Love~Kate
the jws are always grumbling that former jws are trying to "destroy their faith" and that they have nothing nice to say about the men who write for the watchtower or their peculiar teachings.. but then---jws go to people's homes and try to convince them that they should stop:.
praising jesus,.
celebrating or honoring their lord and savior on his resurrection or on his birth,.
Hi Sara ! I sent you a message. Those were some wild times weren't they? We were there to give disfellowshipped JWs a safe place to come chat that was always open and we tried to make sure someone was always there to talk to. The JWs hated it, hated us, how dare we do such a thing for apostate scum!
And yes I have been DA and I have been isolated and alone. I know what it is like, but it is also ourselves we have to look at cant blame everyone else all the time because of our own failings.
I'm sorry you have been feeling alone. Glad that you are here and are free to open up about your feelings. Here people are free to disagree, nobody will shun you or kick you off. If you have been DA'd for some offense, who are they to tell you when you are worthy to be forgiven? You know this Scripture well, Jesus talking; Luke 17:3-5 Be careful. If your brother sins against you, rebuke him. If he repents, forgive him. If he sins against you seven times in the day, and seven times returns, saying, 'I repent,' you shall forgive him." The apostles said to the Lord, "Increase our faith." If someone hurts you deliberatly you go "rebuke" which means tell them how you feel about what they did. That is if you hurt me, I am to go directly to you and tell you. When you say I'm sorry, its done. If you not sorry I am to pray for you and love you all the more. Matthew 5:44 But I tell you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who mistreat you and persecute you, So why are they shunning you? Why have they done the worst thing you can do to the human heart, withdraw affections? What gives them the right? Not God! As far as DF and DA goes, there is one instance and one alone in the Bible that JWs use to justify thier meaness and judgemental ways. They use it entirely out of context. A guy was flaunting in the church that he was doing his mother in law, well duh..something had to be done. 1 Corinthians 5:1 It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and such sexual immorality as is not even named among the Gentiles, that one has his father's wife. Ok so if I am going to a church, and this guy openly flaunts that he is doing his step mom and everyone thinks this is ok and no one says anything or does anything in effect condoning it, Paul was saying don't party with this guy. This is gross. Were you having sex with your stepfather? Paul wanted them to understand that church was not a swingers club.
i think this is left over from dubdays, dunno.
when i need to be assertive i fizzle out.
my husband was furious when he came home.
Really? OK here goes..YOUR STUPID AVATAR LOOKS LIKE A DAM NASTY OLD ELDER WHO SMELLS LIKE CHEAP WALMART COLOGNE AND HAS THE MENTALITY OF A FERRET AND A BRAIN THE SIZE OF A WALNUT!
ahhhh that felt good, now I can sleep...
