Hey silent. You are in the limbo stage of half in half out, I was only there for about 6 months and I felt like I was having a breakdown. Once youve made the decision to walk away and make a clean break, you will start to heal, for your own mental state you have to do that.
in terms of your faith, read In Search of Christian Freeedom by Ray Franz, he negates the need of an organisation and together with Crisis of Conscience, reveals the false practices and doctrines of the org. If you do feel you need a church, find a tolerant, non offensive one. We know now the witnesses have got a great deal wrong in terms of their hierarchy, judgementalism, lack of love, judicial process, shunning, blood, birthdays, worship of the governing body etc...... . So why is it such a big deal to attend somewhere that might have some other doctrines wrong. Let's face it the chances are they're all a bit wrong, if there is God, then he hasn't made it very clear.