Hey Alligator,
I wonder if your problem is not with the elders but with your wife. Elders are paid snoops. That is their job.
If I found out my wife was riding around with elders in my car and then gave them access to it unsupervised, I would be very upset with her.
Even a casino won't let me sit at a blackjack table for long if I am not playing.
When the elders and other JWs tried to tell my wife and my sons that I was bad association, I declared war on them. I summoned them to meet with me and with other former Witnesses in a public forum. I told my story on the front page of the local daily newspaper. I sat with the Pay Attention book on my lap during an interview on local television. I ran newspaper ads and wrote my experiences and sent those to all who asked.
I confronted the evil of the Watch Tower Corporation head on and publicly and I am still doing so.
If you are willing to give the JWs access to your wife and to your car, I can't see how you can be surprised when they worm their way through your belongings. I hope you someday get the courage to stand up and confront the evil and the lies. Fear and frustration vanished for me when I saw them running from me. They are chicken house weasels and they only prey on the weak and the vulnerable. They fear the strong armed with facts and willing to go public.
Once I feared their shunning, but it has been a gift and I only hope it continues. Once I made the decision to confront them, my wife had to make the decision to go with them and be my enemy or to stay with me. If she would rather be my enemy, I didn't want her. I wanted to know. My parents, my brother, my Witness sons and relatives are a real disappointment to me. I am ashamed of them. I am ashamed to be related to them. They and not welcome in my home OR in my car. They choose, with full knowledge, to support a book publishing corporation masquerading as a religion that abuses people and divides families.
I am proud to stand with the visible victims.
Gary Busselman
The Way I See it http://www.freeminds.org/buss/buss.htm