Posts by GentlyFeral

I originally planned it to be more of a performance art piece, where I would go around the party witnessing to people, but that was too psychotic even for me.

Yeah, the jaydub-as-performance-art thing would nauseate me even now, eight years out.

But *brainstorm* you could anti-witness -- "Yes, Proverbs 4:18 proves that Jehovah's people know all kinds of bull**** that ain't so. Now, Jesus applied this scripture in [pick verse at random and read it], which shows that my standing here talking to you is a total waste of time. Gimme some candy."

Now that might be fun.

GentlyFeral

18

Are you the weakest link?

by Dimples in

jw
friends

are you the weakest link?

second question: if you overtake the last person, then you are...?.

last question: mary's father has five daughters: nana, nene, nini, nono.. what is the name of the fifth daughter?.

GentlyFeral

SaintSatan,

I got em all right except for the 4100 one. But i don't believe you or my stupid calculator.

I did it by hand the second time and realized that when "carrying over" from 90 to 100 in your head it's easy to slip over into the 1000's column by mistake.

I got all the other questions wrong too, because I misread them

GentlyFeral

13

Faith beyond beliefs

by Narkissos in

to make a long story short, i'm an xjw from france: born and baptized as a catholic, i became a jw in 1972 at the age of 13 with part of my family; then a pioneer and a bethel member, before being disfellowshipped for "apostasy" in 1986. afterwards, involved in theology and bible edition with the mainstream protestant churches, slowly drifting from the evangelical to the liberal wing and finally out of all religious groups and beliefs.

the "atheologist" label, i guess, would suit fairly enough by now.. the question i'd like to ask my fellow xjw "brothers and sisters" (and there seems to be plenty of them around .

the question is especially directed to those of you who would not easily term themselves "christians", and who have not sticked to any recognized "creed".

GentlyFeral

Nothing but the Golden Rule -- Matthew 7:12.

When I began questioning the Bible, nothing els e was left standing-- not even Jesus.

GentlyFeral

62

How many have left the WTS and joined another church/group?

by BLISSISIGNORANCE in

jw
friends

at this point in my life i don't think i could trust any religious group.

i don't even feel the need to be a part of anything like that right now, and maybe never will.. but i know of some who have joined other churches/groups since leaving the borg.. why do some join another religion and why won't some ever get involved again?.

what makes us so different?.

GentlyFeral

Well, for seven years post-jaydub, I was Unitarian Universalist. Basically, they believe in intellectual honesty and the Golden Rule, freedom of conscience and the democratic process. A great place to hang out if you want non-judgemental company on life's journey. A safe place to have a religious breakdown, which is precisely what I needed seven years ago.

www.uua.org

They're one of the most "hands-off" religions around when it comes to telling members what to believe. Jesus is optional; so is belief in god. Many UU's are agnostic or atheist, and they are happy to share a pew with a UU Buddhist, a UU Christian (yes, there still are some) or a UU Pagan.

One of my coolest experiences there was attending a Build Your Own Theology class with a bunch of non-theists, who were fascinated by us pagans and wanted to know how it felt to have imaginary friends in high places (my phrase, not theirs ). What surprised me was how charming they found the whole thing!

GentlyFeral
reminiscing, just a little bit

44

What Do You Miss Most About Having Been A Witness?

by minimus in

jw
friends

anything??

?

GentlyFeral

True prophecy (ha!) - or, as dmouse said, "knowing all the answers.
I was going to say "interracial friendships," but, hello...my boss and 2 favorite workmates are black, and I ain't.
Having a semi-plausible excuse not to find a job (it's better that sisters stay home with the kids).

And that's it -- a pretty poor haul for 23 years, huh?

GentlyFeral

42

276,483 years from now.....

by SanFranciscoJim in

jw
friends

jehovah's witnesses are taught that they will live "forever" on paradise earth.. let's say the year is 278,486 (assuming armageddon occurred in 2003).

the millenium has passed, everyone has been resurrected, and earth has become the true paradise the jws predicted.. only one problem: you've done everything there is to do.

you've gone every place on earth there is to go.

GentlyFeral

Long before this date, controlled amnesia will have been raised to a high art, so that everybody can have a clean slate as often as they need it.

I'm much more worried about the exhaustion of non-renewable resources in a world where eternal life is a fact.

GentlyFeral

2

Looking for the VAN ROEKEL family, SF bay area, 1980's

by GentlyFeral in

hubby and i got to reminiscing about a jw family who we were close to back in the '80s.

they took us in (for a year!

) when we got cheated by a landlord, gave my husband a job, were good friends.

GentlyFeral

Hubby and I got to reminiscing about a JW family who we were close to back in the '80s. They took us in (for a year!) when we got cheated by a landlord, gave my husband a job, were good friends. They left about ten years before we did and we were stupid enough to shun them. They went through a bunch of changes we couldn't wrap our heads around back then.

If you know Bert and Martha "Marti" Van Roekel (they're divorced now & Marti has remarried), and their children Warren, Tabitha, Jepthah, Bathsheba and Micaiah, give us a yell!

Thanks

GentlyFeral

59

Do Ex-JW men really understand women?

by Mindchild in

jw
friends

hey guys, .

in light of our past shared watchtower delusions, especially relating to understanding women, i thought it would be interesting to see how well everyone scores compared to your real world counterparts in understanding women.. you can take the sexual aptitude test here: http://www.menshealth.com/cda/quizleadin/1,6927,s1-2-0-0-427,00.html.

no cheating now!

GentlyFeral

OK, I answered these questions in a way that reflected the kind of woman I am or the way I'd like to be treated.

1. You met Wendy at a bar, at a bar mitzvah, in baggage claim, whatever, we don't care. The point is that the extremely hot Wendy is perhaps slightly out of your league, but not so far that you lack hope. Besides, in your best moments, you recall that Wendy seemed interested. Right now, Wendy is probably thinking . .
Oops, You answered: D About something other than you.

The women I'm attracted to have their own lives, goddammit, and would notice me in passing - the way I notice women who glitter on the street. "All right, how can I reorganize my workplace for maximum efficiency....WHOA! who was that?"

2. It's Saturday night, and you find yourself--gee, who'da thunk it?--in a loud, crowded bar. You spot a female you think might make a wonder- ful companion--for an evening, for a lifetime . . . who can say? The line most likely to get you in there is . . .
Oops, You answered: D No line, because lines aren't cool. ... If you answered D, you are definitely cool. You are also definitely taking off your own pants tonight. It's all about C: direct, sexy, confident. A girl who's in a bar on a Saturday night doesn't want to hear anything else.

I suppose this is why I do so badly in bars, especially dyke bars. It's just as much about looks there as in str8 bars. I do much better at pagan festivals, where a philosophical discussion sometimes ends in bed.

3. In your first extended private conversation, the best way to distinguish yourself as the man she wants is to...
Oops, You answered: Search for things you have in common that you can discuss. ... the search for common ground can be exhausting and repetitive. (Yep, empanadas. Yep, I like 'em, too. Chicken ones. Yep. Tennis. Love it. Great. Yep.)

But that's not what happens!!!! No!

She: "So what did you think of the Harry Potter movie?"
He: "I was disappointed. Reduced a complex character to a cardboard action hero."
She: "Oh, me too! All of a sudden, anything Harry wants is right. Completely tore the ethical heart out of the book..." et cetera.

This question was formulated by someone who has no idea of conversation!

4. The correct number of flowers to bring to a woman the first time you bring flowers is . . .
Correct! 5
The answer is C. One flower suggests you haven't had sex since your prom.

Oh, ick. But it does remind me of Dorothy Parker's immortal poem .

Five flowers advertises you as a man of restraint and taste -- polite, generous, but not overeager.

Exactly. Five or six.

6. It's time for the First Significant Gift for a Significant Woman. The most appropriate gift is...
Oops, You answered: New stereo speakers ($200 or so), because she really needs them... thoughtful but not sexy.

But, damn, if this is the stereotypical meat-market relationship, you've already done "sexy." "Thoughtful" is reassuring. But then, I thought a Cuisinart was the perfect anniversary gift. A really "significant gift" should show that CARE enough about her interests to find out what the best gift is, and find it for her. If she's into music, buy her the damn speakers.

7. You like to have sex doggy-style. She likes it, too, but nowhere near as much as you do. How many non- doggy-style encounters should occur before you request doggy-style again?
Oops, You answered: 2 The correct answer is 0
The answer is A [0], and yes, this is a trick question. What, pray tell, would you be doing requesting things in bed?

Oh, I dunno...treating her like an equal?

8. It's very obvious to you, not being blind or deaf, that your long-term (1 year plus) girlfriend has a crush on a male friend. You like this woman and don't feel like losing her to this bozo, who just happens to have a six-pack, a lot of money, and a great personality. Assuming you and your girlfriend have a good relationship, the strategy most likely to keep you in and Bozo out involves . . .
Oops, You answered: Letting your girlfriend know that you've noticed her little case of wandering eye and you'd prefer that she and Bozo weren't friends. The correct answer is Doing nothing.

"Doing nothing" actually has some points - especially if either of you is at all thin-skinned. There's a good chance that the crush may burn itself out. Or that you may discover that she's too superficial to be worth keeping.

Once again, honesty is best, because IT SHOWS RESPECT.

The impulse to make yourself over (B) is misguided--she's not dreaming of a new you; she's dreaming, as you sometimes do, of novelty.

Spot on, and...

Demanding fidelity, especially when the demand stems from insecurity, is the best way not to get it.

So don't demand fidelity. Request reassurance.

9. If x equals the number of men she told you she's slept with and y equals the actual number, then x/y is...
Oops, You answered: 1 (she told you the truth)

Look, if I'm willing to sleep with you outside of marriage, I'm certainly willing to tell you the truth about my other sex partners...

If the subject even comes up.

10. During a fight, your girlfriend launches an assault on your personality in a way that is both meticulously detailed and very loud. When it's your turn to speak, the absolute worst response you can give is . . .
Oops, You answered: "I'd be willing to accept the fact that I am the world's biggest jerk, but I really think that award might go to you. Let me tell you why. . . ." The correct answer is "I don't know what to say."

Crap. Limpness of spirit is irritating, but cruelty is unforgivable.

11. You've been dating a woman for 2 months. Assume that there is no one else and you want out because you're not into her anymore. The best reason you can give is...
Oops, You answered: "I don't think I'm capable of offering the kind of intimacy you deserve." The correct answer is "There's someone else."
Anyone who is dumped knows deep down that the reason why is always some simple variation on [I'm not as sexually attracted to you as I thought], which, unfortunately, is too cruel a thing to say.

Yes, it is cruel, but this isn't even true. I had a love affair die of intellectual boredom - but I still think she's hot. We're not together any more.

However, C and D are even crueler, because women, nursed on soap operas and The Quiet Storm, hear them as rays of poignant romantic hope.

Well, "not capable of the intimacy you deserve" covers more ground than "not sexually attracted." The way I put it to my ex-girlfriend was "I don't think we're a very good match after all, and I'm sorry."

Soap operas. Feh. I've always hated them!

"There's someone else" might be a lie, but it's also the only breakup language women seem to understand. Please learn to speak it.

More crap. All she wanted to know was, "Can I still think of you naked?"

12. You live in New York City and met Denise, who lives in St. Louis, at a wedding in Miami. You got drunk, went back to her hotel room, and took things from there. A month later, Denise is in New York and you have sex once more, but the thrill is gone. You tell her you think you'd be better as friends. Next thing you know, Denise is in New York for 3 months on business and sees you as her personal tour guide. You have an obligation to...
Oops, You answered: Sit Denise down and explain to her that you had a really great time at the wedding and you're sorry things didn't work out. You have your life and she has hers, and you wish her the best but don't have time to invest in her.

This is the most ethical answer, and I chose it because the question describe it as an obligation. But what I actually did was the one recommended -

The correct answer is Screen Denise's calls repeatedly until she gets the message.

So I have my chickenshit moments. Nobody's perfect.

GentlyFeral

59

Do Ex-JW men really understand women?

by Mindchild in

jw
friends

hey guys, .

in light of our past shared watchtower delusions, especially relating to understanding women, i thought it would be interesting to see how well everyone scores compared to your real world counterparts in understanding women.. you can take the sexual aptitude test here: http://www.menshealth.com/cda/quizleadin/1,6927,s1-2-0-0-427,00.html.

no cheating now!

GentlyFeral

gadget,

But what if they are really cute when they're mad?

Tell us later, after you've made us laugh about something else. Honesty is essential, but don't be foolhardy, ok?

GentlyFeral
female too