On March this year (2009) I DAd myself from the JWs. Of course, it was nice to finally feel free, real free, after over 40 years of mind control. I don't write much here but I feel this is worth sharing.
One measure I took before leaving was to take my then 15 year old son for a walk and explain to him that things would be different from the JWs standpoint, but that I would always love him and that he could come to me at any time.
One thing that was very hard for me, is the fact that I separated from my wife, with which I was having problems for a long time already. Of course, the belief that everything would be fixed in the New Order, when we were brought up to perfection, kept us together, but when that belief vanished in thin air there was absolutely no point of staying together. This, of course, caused a lot of grief and stress for my son. For almost 3 or 4 months after I separated from my wife, he wouldn't talk or call me. All the time I kept calling and texting him confirming my unconditional love to him.
One of the things I mentioned on that walk was that it would come a point when the elders would tell him that he should not talk to me or have anything to do with me. That turned out to be a very good idea.
Fast forward to october. He calls me and asks me for permission to go to a get together with a 'worldly' family with which he has a very good relationship. His mom wouldn't allow it. That was something he found wrong. He's allowed to go practically anywhere with witness families, but in this one case, just because it was a worldly family the answer was NO. So he came to me and I said YES, of course.
So he went and in the end it came out and he was approached by the elders who, among other things, told him DO NOT TALK TO YOUR DAD, it is not wise and showed him a couple of Bible texts.
That made him click and remember that conversation we had and he told me about it. After that we have had very interesting conversations about shunning and disfellowshipping. I'm really happy and hope that he's willing to open his mind and starts opening his mind and questioning things...
Vivalavida