As I'm sure many of us ex dubs do I have had tremendous fear, anxiety, curiosity and overall need for answers about spirits. We all learned the same shite. Any spirits are demons. Well that's all fine and convenient, but the older I get and the more I try to piece together the puzzle of my childhood, it just doesn't make sense. Yet my fear remains.
I fear that if there is a spirit world if I try to learn about it I will somehow be exposed to and caught up in some kind of "evil." I fear that my grandfather who was/is involved in ritual abuse and who knows what else somehow put some kind of mark on me and therefore any spirit world door that I open will be flooded with ill intentioned spirits.
And quite frankly, I'm f*cking TIRED of being afraid of something. It drives me nuts and it's simply no way to go about life.
Sooo....I figured an interesting and hopefully helpful start would be to ask people that are "in the know" about such things. I posted a question on a paranormal forum about such things, including that I was raised a dub and what my lovely ol' grandaddy was into. I am in curious anticipation for responses...
Posts by feenx
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21May have just opened can of worms - posted on a spirit world forum
by feenx inas i'm sure many of us ex dubs do i have had tremendous fear, anxiety, curiosity and overall need for answers about spirits.
we all learned the same shite.
any spirits are demons.
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feenx
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Adam and Eve - already dying BEFORE eating from tree?
by feenx ini am in the midst of reading jehovah unmasked and have come to a very interesting point.
nathaniel j. merritt says that a close reading of genesis 3:22-24 shows that adam and eve were already dying.
i found this to be a very interesting idea, in addition to the very plain and simple use of words in that passage that clearly states indeed the serpent's promise to eve was correct.
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feenx
Thank you for the input :)
I am not saying I am by any means entrenched in the gnostic camp. I referenced it simply because gnostics refer to YHWH as A god, not THE god, unlike JW's. I find it interesting that ancient texts have different explanations for things based on the traditional canon. And I also think it's interesting that people are very quick to accept these texts automatically as complete truth or complete fiction.
Some seem to feel they must be right if they were hidden and never spoken of, others feel that the people who labeled them as heresy or untruth must be right, otherwise they wouldn't have done so.
To me both seem to be extreme ends of the spectrum, and easy ways to accept or dismiss what is said, rather than finding for themselves what they feel is right.
In any event, I very much like the idea that YHWH is not supreme, as based on my experiences growing up, what I was taught, and what I've experienced in life this hypothesis seems to feel right. -
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have you ever been to a psychic?
by still_in74 injust curious...... have you as a jw / ex jw ever been to a psychic or spirit medium, or even played with a ouiji board?.
what was your experience ?
?.
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feenx
I have not been to a psychic, though I've definitely thought about it. However I've been anxious to do so because my grandfather was into ritual abuse, and I've always had the sense that through that and my experiences with him I've been exposed to say...an evil side of things. And so I've always been afraid to experiment and possibly open that door....any thoughts on that aspect of things??
I haven't heard about the government aspect before. Does anyone have info on that? -
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Adam and Eve - already dying BEFORE eating from tree?
by feenx ini am in the midst of reading jehovah unmasked and have come to a very interesting point.
nathaniel j. merritt says that a close reading of genesis 3:22-24 shows that adam and eve were already dying.
i found this to be a very interesting idea, in addition to the very plain and simple use of words in that passage that clearly states indeed the serpent's promise to eve was correct.
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feenx
I am in the midst of reading Jehovah Unmasked and have come to a very interesting point. Nathaniel J. Merritt says that a close reading of Genesis 3:22-24 shows that Adam and Eve were already dying. I found this to be a very interesting idea, in addition to the very plain and simple use of words in that passage that clearly states indeed the Serpent's promise to Eve was correct.
New International Version - Genesis 3:22-24:
22 "And the LORD God said, `The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil. He must not be allowed to reach out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat, and live forever.' 23 So the LORD God banished him from the Garden of Eden to work the ground from which he had been taken. 24 After he drove the man out, he placed on the east side [a] of the Garden of Eden cherubim and a flaming sword flashing back and forth to guard the way to the tree of life."
a. Genesis 3:24 or "placed in front."
I've been reading and doing research on the Gnostic gospels and writings, so I've already come across many writings about Jehovah simply being the creator of Earth and nothing more, and that in fact there are other god's on his same level, which is essentially middle management. However, this is the one the first very clear cut instances I've read in the traditional canon that eludes to this, "The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil."
In this part of the book Merritt also goes on to say that in fact YHWH was the first to lie as his threat to Adam and Eve was that they would die.
New International Version - Genesis 2:17
"17 but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat of it you will surely die."
And according to Merritt, the Youngs Literal Translation of the original Hebrew passage at Genesis 2:17 is "in the day of thy eating of it, dying thou dost die." Which would imply first that they were already dying and secondly that that very day death would come.
Obviously very different teachings than we had as JW's. Thoughts? -
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Apple Mac users-HELP!
by Chalam inhi jwd mac users, .
any tips for me?
i am using safari on the mac and i have trouble editing posts, i have managed it once or twice within the 30 minutes time limit but normally it gives me trouble.
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feenx
Hey there :)
Well sadly my solution has been to use a PC at work for certain things on here. I had a helluva time getting my pic and info up, tried several times but no luck. Finally I had to use a PC to do it and it worked like a charm. I've never tried to use the edit function, so can't help you there. I always have to format my messages with HTML breaks, which works fine. So I'm sure if you found a simple embed code online for anything you want to link it should work fine. I also have to send and reply to PM's from a PC as well. :/ -
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I'M NO LONGER A NEWBIE!!!!
by tooktheredpill inthis is my post #100!.
thanks a lot for all your support to date!.
have a great day!!.
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feenx
CONGRATS!! :)
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Husband talking about having kids, reading awake to me, keeps asking ???
by cognac inso, first he calls me at work, we've been getting along fine, and asks me the % of how much i want to be in the truth.
i told him 50/50.
i like the spiritual aspect of it, the people, etc.
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feenx
Cognac -
You've mentioned several times that there are nice things to read from the society. This can be very true. However, with this inner struggle that you have maybe there's a different way to look at things. If you came across an informative, seemingly well thought out and written article by someone who's name you didn't recognize, enjoyed it, and then upon further research found out the writer was in fact a convicted felon and writing from prison...would you still care to read his well presented thoughts? The Watchtower and Awake is essentially the same thing. Though there are no convicted felons on the writing staff or the GB, we all know, at the very least, all the moral crimes they've committed, not to mention all the allegations we've seen on this board. So even if something is presented on a different topic or seems logical, it still has the same source, e.g. the same mental attitude and motivation behind everything that's written.
Secondly, there are plenty of other wonderful things to read about family and marriage and relationships and love etc. etc. etc. that are out there that both you and your husband can share in. Why limit to yourself to what the WTBS puts out? If these pleasant things to read are something you both truly enjoy, then surely you would want as much as possible. And I promise you, there is a lot more out there that's good to read than the small library the society encourages you to stick to.
Just some food for thought ;) -
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Aussie actor Heath Ledger was found dead this morning
by Es injust read in our newspaper that he was found dead in his bed this morning.
i thought he was a great actor.. r.i.p.
es.
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feenx
apparent O.D. Sleeping pills were strewn in his apartment, so far it's unclear if was accidental or intentional. SHITE!!! i loved him! :(:(:(:(
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Newbies - Tell Us Your Stories Getting out of the Witnesses
by flipper inhello newbies and others.
it is really exciting to see so many joining on board here looking for support !
perhaps some of us who have been there done that can give you some tips to make life a bit easier exiting the mind control cult, jehovah's witnesses .
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feenx
I was born in "the Truth." All family members on both sides were JW's as well. On my fathers side my great grandmother was annointed, my great uncle was the branch overseer in Seoul Korea, my grandfather was a D.O. in the Phillipines before being a C.O. in the U.S. and my other great uncle remains the city overseer here locally. My father and mother are still active, and my father has been Elder for approx 18-20 years. I am an only child.
I was a Silentlamb, due to my grandfather on my mother's side. She also suffered abuse from him, and in turn has been diagnosed with D.I.D. (dissociative identity disorder, previously known as M.P.D. = Multiple Personality Disorder). At last estimate she has upwards of 30-40 alters. My grandfather molested me from the approximate ages of 4ish to 9ish. Some of my memories include my grandmother, my great grandmother and cousins, along with all the violence mixed in with his perversion.
I spent my pre-teen years in therapy, while still a full fledged JW. I spent my teen years dealing with my mothers suicide attempts, mental institution and hospital visits and my fathers deep stress and depression, all while still doing everything he was supposed to as an Elder, including teaching me the ways of "the truth." I was baptized when I was 16 or 17.
In my late teens I again sought therapy, not realizing that some of my issues were not solely based on sustained abuse, the abuse is still what got all the attention.
After having moved back into my parents house for a brief time at the age of 20 my father kicked me out of his house. Once in my own place I grew inactive, and quite unhealthy emotionally. Wait...let me re-phrase. I was ALREADY unhealthy emotionally. However it was at this point that the shite started to hit the fan and I was forced to realize it was time to go back into therapy.
In the midst of this turmoil, not having anywhere to turn, I fornicated (I still laugh at that term!) and was DF'd with one J.C. meeting where they "deliberated" for about 30 minutes. They told me rather than looking for support in the arms of a worldly woman I should've "drawn close to those in the congregation." That was as deep as they wanted to probe into anything that was motivating my actions at the time.
I've never gone back, and since getting the boot have had some very successful therapy. We all have our problems, but I can honestly say each day, each month and each year that passes that I am away from all of my past keeps getting better and better :) -
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NWT based off a Catholic chosen canon, WTBS ever comment on?
by feenx inafter reading elaine pagels book the gnostic gospels, ive wondered if theres ever been a statement made by the wtbs regarding the origins of the nwt, besides the painstaking efforts made to keep the translation accurate despite how the rest of the world translated the bible.
as jws we were taught to follow the example set forth for and by the first century christians, however no doubt many of those first century christians were or became catholic as at the time that was the first legitimate, or universal, christian church established in spite of opposition and persecution from the romans.
in essence the great harlot herself defined many things that modern day jws still see as fact.
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feenx
However I believe just like in the borg, "the truth" has different layers. Yes, the Catholic church is responsible for the bible canon, and yes since it's inception it has changed before coming to it's now "final" version. However, there are also things the Catholic church usually stays from discussing (though they don't seem to be quite as deceitful as JW's are) in reference to what we know as the Bible. Such as the many texts that were not included in the canon, why they were not included and why they were suppressed.
I suggest reading The Gnostic Gospels by Elaine Pagels. Regardless of ones personal feelings on the gnostic gospels (all the texts not in the bible canon) Elaine Pagels gives a very good and concise history of the development of Christianity.
Also the wiki articles on the history of the canon is a good source of timelines and who the players were at the conferences determining the canon.