Posts by LunaFing

44

Hi I'm new here - a bit about me

by Fishbulb in

well where do i start?

i am 34, male and gay.

when i was about 15 i was exposed to the witnesses teachings.

sorry this has turned out longer than i thought.anyway i lived the life of a single mother fell away from the organisation,and eventually met a (worldly) guy who is the most loving guy i have ever met,my best friend,lover and soulmate.i was disfellowshipped 4 months ago because we live with each other and plan to get married in september,unacceptable to the society hence my disfellowshipping.it has broke my mum and dads heart and im so so sorry for this,i love them so much,but no longer want or believe in the jw beliefs.

i still believe in god but dont know where im bound as regards my faith,i really do want to have something.

apart from my mum and dad and the shunning arrangement im so happy,the happiest i have ever been in years,and my 2 youngest ones are happy as well..my eldest daughter is 16 and planning on getting baptised in july which is tearing me apart,she is so like me,but is being brainwashed by a certain crowd of witnesses,need i say anymore...my eldest son who is 18 isnt in the truth and feels the same way i do... anyway thanks for this forum and hope to hear from likeminded friends soon.

LunaFing

Hi! Welcome. Aren't "worldly" men great? I was married to a witness for 3 years and it was a horrible marriage. I divorced him then met my current husband. We've been happily married for 6 years. Great to have you here!

37

New Here

by LearningMore in

i have been lurking here for a couple of months.

i was born and raised as a witness, and am a little weirded out to even be posting on here (you know the paranoia).

anyway, i faded about 10 years ago, and after reading so many posts, i am so happy that it was a pretty uneventful experience.

LunaFing

Welcome to JWD! You'll find that most people here will know exactly what you're feeling. I've been here for a couple of months and I'm hooked! My husband doesn't understand why I love this site either. Like you said: it takes one to know one.

28

Hey all! New to JWD

by JezeBell in

hey everyone!

just joined this board, but not new to boards of this sort.. the board i favored most just changed and i haven't rejoined (mainly because it sux now).. i have heard about this board for awhile, but this is the first time i ventured in.

just kinda.

LunaFing

Welcome! I came here for the same reasons as you. I'm sure you'll love it as much as I have.

17

Nephew Will Be Getting Degree Tomorrow

by snowbird in

he will be receiving a bs in education.. he plans on continuing for his ms and phd; his long-range goal is to become superintendent of schools here!.

he is a ministerial servant and can give very thorough and polished talks.. my daughter finished her freshman year with a 4.0 gpa in the college of business at the same university.. they're not your typical jw kids, are they?.

just thought i'd share.. sylvia.

LunaFing

Congrats! It's so nice to hear that some people can think for themselves even though they are JW's. They are a great example to all the other JW kids.

36

Im a newbie

by jetery in

baptized at 15 because forced into it.

i left the jw 2 years ago.

i should have left a long time ago.

LunaFing

Welcome! I'm a newbie as well. This site is one of the best things I've found since leaving the JW's. I've been out 10 years. Hope to see more posts from you!

6

Why and when I lost my faith

by LunaFing in

my father started studying after a while.

he studied off and on for the next 8 years.

i was abused during this time as well.

LunaFing

OnTheWayOut: Thanks for your post. I really love my mother and want her in my life. You are right though about that getting in the way of my healing process. I've been going to counseling since Dec and it's been helping a lot. My father is the one paying for the counseling. Ever since I've been to therapy my relation with my Mother has been a bit strained. I now know that I've been harboring resentful feelings toward her. I feel real bad about it, but my happiness comes first. I'm glad I joined this forum.

16

Why and when I lost my faith

by LunaFing in

my father started studying after a while.

he studied off and on for the next 8 years.

i was abused during this time as well.

LunaFing

I just want to thank you all for your posts. It's nice to know that there are people out there who understand what I'm going through. I really LOVE this site!

6

Why and when I lost my faith

by LunaFing in

my father started studying after a while.

he studied off and on for the next 8 years.

i was abused during this time as well.

LunaFing

I lost my faith when I was twelve. I have to start from the beginning: My father started molesting me when I was 5 years old. My mother started studying with the JW's when I was 6. She was trying to find the "right" religion and found it with the JW's, so I was brought up as one as well. My father started studying after a while. He studied off and on for the next 8 years. I was abused during this time as well. When I was old enough to understand that what he was doing to me was wrong, I was confused as to why Jehovah let that happen. I figured that maybe I was a bad person and that Jehovah didn't love me 'cause I wasn't worthy. Then I would go to the meetings and they would tell you that Jehovah was a loving God. I was really confused. I tried my best to be a "good" person, but the people in the congo always treated me differently from the other kids. To this day I'm not sure what it was about me that made people think badly of me. I never did anything wrong. I went to the meetings and service. I commented at the meetings and the book study. I didn't smile much and kept to myself a lot of the times. I wasn't anti-social or anything.It always seemed like the brothers wouldn't want their kids to hang out with me. Anyway, I decided to get baptized at age 11 because I thought that Jehovah would protect me if I devoted my life to him. Of course I was greatly mistaken. The abuse didn't stop and the brothers where even nastier to me. One year later my father got baptized. He had stopped molesting me 2 months before. The day he got baptized was the day I started to lose my faith. He started to get privliges in the congo and even said the prayer at the end of the book study. Everyone treated him with respect and treated me like dirt. Needless to say I stopped praying. I told my mother that I didn't want to go to service anymore because I didn't feel the love for Jehovah that the bible talked about and I didn't want to be a hypocrite. She said she didn't care and that I would have to fake it. At this point I had already told her of the abuse and my lost faith. By the time I was 15 I was convinced that I didn't want to be a JW. I decided to tell a friend about what had happened to me and he in turn told the Elders. To make a long story short, CPS was called and my father had to flee because he was going to be arrested. People in the hall didn't know what was going on and the few that did didn't do anything to help me. No one tried to talk to me about why I had lost faith in the religion. It was real easy for me to leave. My Mother just wanted to get rid of me so she let me marry my 21 year old boyfriend. Of course everyone in the hall thought I had run away from home and that was that. No one tried to get me back. No one cared. So now, 10 years later I'm on this site and very happy to be out! Thanks everyone for listening.

18

A offense against all involved?

by DJK in

i have heard it on this forum that victims are sometimes considered an offender.

i did believe it, just never wanted to hear my father say or agree with it.

now i'm angry.i e-mailed him the trial results from california last week and this is his reply.

LunaFing

I was molested by my father from age 5 to 12. The Elders were told a year after it stopped. They didn't do anything to my father and didn't report it either. I would like to say that I was treated very nicely by the Elders and wasn't made to feel like it was my fault.