My husband was an elder and we had been married 20 years and had 15 and 14 year old daughters (unbaptized).
I said "I am filing for a divorce, I am done with the marriage and the religion and I want full custody of the girls". And that is exactly what I did. I ripped the band aid off with not one regret. He did not have a clue it was coming (way too busy serving the cong to notice a wife and daughters)