NO....I often likened myself to the parable of the two sons....A man had two sons, and he came to the first, and said, 'Son, go work today in my vineyard.' He answered, 'I will not,' but afterward he changed his mind, and went. He came to the second, and said the same thing. He answered, 'I go, sir,' but he didn't go. Which of the two did the will of his father?"
For the decade I pioneered I ways always short on my time. I felt like I had promised Jehovah something I could not deliver and He would have to destroy me.