Posts by VIII

30

I have to brag about my kid

by JeffT in

jw
friends

alex, our youngest graduated cum laude from the university of washington today with a bachelor's in environmental science and a minor in quantitative analysis.

he has a job in his field.

he and his fiance, who also graduated today (biology) are getting married july 1. she's starting a phd program at berkeley in august, so they're moving.

VIII

That is fantastic! Congrats to both of them! Keep bragging.

40

Just some personal ramblings. Move on if you want to argue.

by OnTheWayOut in

jw
friends

okay, first of all: i like the earth, the polar bears, the whales, and any other part of the planet that someone wants to help.

i appreciate any efforts that people exert.

the planet is going through global warming and pumping exhaust from automobiles and factories and other sources does contribute to the global warming.

The ugliest statment A parent can say to their child.

by jam in

jw
friends

my ex (jw) told my two youngest 9 and 11, your dad.

wanted more kids, meaning them.

we had two older.. how would a child feel after their mother tell them, i really.

Oh Mrsjones, that is hideous. Give your husband an extra hug and kiss tonight and let him know that you love him. My MIL was not a JW and she was just as bad. Bad parenting and lack of love knows no religion.

As for things teens say to parents: I was circumspect. My sister was not. She got kicked out of the house and ended up in an abusive relationship as a result.

35

The ugliest statment A parent can say to their child.

by jam in

jw
friends

my ex (jw) told my two youngest 9 and 11, your dad.

wanted more kids, meaning them.

we had two older.. how would a child feel after their mother tell them, i really.

VIII

How horrible parents can be!

My mom has said and done many similar things as reported. One sticks out-she repeatedly told my sister and I that our father never loved us and that "we were millstones around her neck" that was one of her favorite phrases to let us know how lucky we were to have her as our mother. She would then threaten to drop us at the local orphanage if we acted up in any way at all. She did drive us there once and demanded that we get out and announce ourselves. We had to beg for mercy, say we were sorry and plead with her to take us home. (there was an old fashioned orphanage about 4 blocks from where we lived-it was scary looking!)

She did but I'll always remember how she used our fear of being abandoned as a way to control us.

Some people, obviously, should never procreate.

17

Anxiety attacks and Door to Door Activity...what have you observed?

by Momma-Tossed-Me in

during door to door activity in the distant past i have had the experience of witnessing actual anxiety attacks of jw's who could not handle that required preaching on that day and on more than one occasion.. this is what i have seen on multiple occassions.. extreme headaches, upset stomach to the point of vomiting, visible trembling before even approaching the door, arguments with spouses and children, signs of elevated blood pressure, light sensitiity, a total character change, and basicly a complete shut down to the point of limited communication.

yes we all have butterflies in the stomach associated with certain activities but what i am talking about here bodily affliction to the point of physically affecting the individual in some cases for the rest of the day.. these symptoms are obviously present for some newbie to this type of activity but i have observed this from people who have been exposed to this type of work for years.

i think the body just cannot handle the stress anymore, and the marination in the hormones associated with it.

VIII

God I hated going DTD! Even now when I go to someone's home for a visit I have flashbacks to going DTD w/Wacthtowers & Awakes in my trembling hands. Having to push on their doorbells brings my memories to full panic mode. Then I calm down and remember I've been out for years and I'm going to a Tupperware party and not a "return visit".

I used every and any excuse to not go out on Saturdays. Even if meant staying home the rest of the day-it was small sacrifice to avoid the dreaded field service. (shudder)

14

New Book by Steven Hassan

by leavingwt in

jw
friends

fyi.

steven hassan will be releasing a new book, soon.

freedom of mind: helping loved ones leave controlling people, cults and beliefs.

VIII

Thank you LTW! I'm going to look for it.

31

Memorial is more important than dying relative!

by Orphan Annie in

jw
friends

my husband is gravely ill sedated and on a ventilator.

he most likely isn't going to survive.

we are not disfellowshipped.

VIII

I'm so sorry to read this and hear of your husband's illness.

I understand what you are going through. My mom, an ardent JW, was worried that my sister who was in a hospice, might pass away during the Memorial week! I wanted to yell at her, however, since it was her daughter, I opted for biting my tongue. In the end my sister passed away two weeks before and mom was thrilled she could go to her local congregation.

She did ask that they not have any services for my sister during the Memorial week because mom simply would not attend; she had to go to the local kingdom hall for the Memorial service rather than the funeral for her daughter!!!

322

My son was murdered today

by truman in

i have been on this site daily, almost from its beginning, since i left the jws in 2001, but i have been more of a reader than a poster, as you can see from my post count.

i know few here know me, although i know many of you through reading your posts.

maybe it is not right to ask for support, when i generally stay quietly in the background of this forum, but i want only to speak a human misery of the deepest kind.

VIII

Truman, I again offer my sympathy. My sister passed away three weeks ago and no obituary was written or even thought about for her. I had to write one and put closure to her passing. I also wanted to alert people in the Chicago area that she passed. It was very hard to do. I am not a writer and just wanted to put who she was and who she was loved by. You will do great by your son I'm sure.

I read about your son on google news today and logged on here to let you know you were in my thoughts.

35

Is everyone entitled to their opinion?

by Dogpatch in

jw
friends

i thought this was a very good quote from seth godin's daily blog: .

http://sethgodin.typepad.com/seths_blog/2012/04/is-everyone-entitled-to-their-opinion.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=feed%3a+typepad%2fsethsmainblog+%28seth%27s+blog%29.

is everyone entitled to their opinion?perhaps, but that doesn't mean we need to pay the slightest bit of attention.. there are two things that disqualify someone from being listened to:.

VIII

Yes, they are entitled to their opinion. Even the poor. (eye roll) Even people whose opinions are meaningless to the subject. For example, someone blind telling you the color red looks ugly with your hair color.

That person is entitled to tell you you look ugly in red. Is their opinion worth listening to? I hope I don't have to answer that.

That is my take away from the opening statement. Then I opened the link and read more because it said there are two things that disqualify you from having your opinion heard.

Only one is listed above. And, the example given isn't great. Here is the rest of the cut and paste:

If you're working in Accounts Payable and you hate the company's new logo, the people who created it should and must ignore your opinion. It just doesn't matter to anyone but you.

I'm being deliberately harsh here for a reason. If we're going to do great work, it means that some people aren't going to like it. And if the people who don't like it don't have an impact on what happens to the work after it's complete, the only recourse of someone doing great work is to ignore their opinion.

2. No Credibility. An opinion needs to be based on experience and expertise. I know you don't like cilantro, but whether or not you like it is not extensible to the population at large. On the other hand, if you have a track record of matching the taste sensibility of my target market, then I very much want to hear what you think.

People with a history of bad judgment, people who are quick to jump to conclusions or believe in unicorns or who have limited experience in the market--these people are entitled to opinions, but it's not clear that the creator of the work needs to hear them. They've disqualified themselves because the method they use for forming opinions about how the market will respond is suspect. The scientific method works, and if you're willing to suspend it at will and just go with your angry gut, we don't need to hear from you.

If these two standards sound like precisely the opposite of what gets you on talk radio or active in anonymous chat rooms, you're right. Running your business or your campaign or your non-profit or your sports team based on what you hear on talk radio is nuts.

After reading this whole blog I believe that yes, everyone is entitled to their opinion. Is is worth giving? It depends. Do I have expertise in the area? Do I have knowledge in the area? Am I well read in the area I am dissing or wanting to debate? If all I'm doing is *giving an opinion*, well that is like a butt hole.

Which is why my post count is so low.

322

My son was murdered today

by truman in

i have been on this site daily, almost from its beginning, since i left the jws in 2001, but i have been more of a reader than a poster, as you can see from my post count.

i know few here know me, although i know many of you through reading your posts.

maybe it is not right to ask for support, when i generally stay quietly in the background of this forum, but i want only to speak a human misery of the deepest kind.

VIII

Oh No! I am so sorry for your loss.

That you and your son had a relationship was good thing.

Please accept my condolences.