Posts by RaraAvis

102

Accidental Instantaneous Sex

by rebel8 in

jw
friends

the litter-ature over the years has teachings that imply jehovah's special people are all on the verge of having unplanned sex on a moment's notice, with anyone, at any time.. you must have a chaperone if you are to be alone with someone of the opposite sex, even briefly.. this applies to people of any ages.

you could be a 99-year-old raisin whose flagpole hasn't risen since rutherford was living in beth sarim, but you still shouldn't be alone with a pimply 16-year-old shy obese virgin who still plays with barbie dolls.

she's a seductress!

RaraAvis

jws said - The scriptures also speak against things like theft. Does somebody need to follow you around everyplace there's things you can steal? Is a chaperone constantly accompanying you to work to make sure you don't steal pens and PostIt notes?

Excellent statement! Which made me think, "Where is the list of sin ratings? The list where sins are rated from abominable to eh-no-big-deal?" Why do JWs act as if one of the WORST sins you could commit is sex with the opposite sex? Personally I find lying and being judgemental a lot more offensive. JWs are sex-obssessed there is no doubt about it. Then you get in the real world and you find that yeah you can hang out with someone of the opposite sex and fornicating them doesn't even enter your brain.

BonaFide said - Witnesses are repressed sexually

Yes and that is why, and that is also an understatement. Kind of like the priests who turn to helpless children to get their kicks.

Consensual sex with the opposite sex is hardly the worst thing one could do.

ra

79

How Long Have you Been Out of the Witnesses ? Have you Moved On ?

by flipper in

jw
friends

i have been out over 5 years now.

i feel we all start healing at different speeds depending on how much hurt we went through in exiting ; and how much we've educated ourselves about how and why we were sucked in by a mind control cult.

at first i felt anger towards the organization , but after learning about mind control within 3 years of leaving the cult i felt sorry for those who are still trapped inside the witnesses being deceived.

RaraAvis

I am 45, divorced, ex-pioneer. After growing up as a JW and later living in a foreign country as a need-greater, I returned to the US and left the organization. That was about 17 years ago. I left cold turkey, and was treated as if I was DF'd by most of my "friends." Later I had kids, and their father and I lived together w/o marriage. About 6 years or so after I left, I got a phone call. Someone had written a letter to the society about me, and the elders wanted me to come to the KH to "talk" to them. I refused, so they decided to have a judicial committee meeting over the phone, and called me and put themselves on speaker phone. They asked me a bunch of personal questions to which I responded, "That is none of your business." They said if I didn't come in and talk to them they would have to DF me. It amazed me how they had no respect for personal boundaries and how entitled they felt to ask me such intimate questions. I hadn't been associating with any witnesses, I hadn't been to a meeting, memorial, convention in years, and here they were calling my home. Unbelievable.

It took many years to heal. Even now there are times when I do something that will spark a certain amount of guilt or shame. But for the most part I am so over it. I have visited many different churches, I celebrate the holidays, and birthdays, I vote, I have even had a life-saving blood transfusion.

I do however, still love God, still consider myself a Christian and I am not angry, bitter, or hostile. I think one of the hardest things for ex-JWs is not losing their faith entirely. Or feeling as though they have walked away from God instead of an organization.

It has been interesting reading this site. A friend of mine who is still a witness had told me about this site, and how he was finally understanding some of the things I felt. (he kept in touch with me off and on despite my worldliness) Although a lot of times I don't feel like I fit in here too much.

I guess it's just nice to find people who truly understand the deep control this organization has on people, and what a challenge it is to get out.

ra

10

Baptism valid or not?

by RaraAvis in

i am curious to those of you who were baptised as jws and who have left the organization, but still consider yourselves christians, do you consider your baptism valid?

how many of you out there felt the need to be rebaptised?.

ra.

RaraAvis

I am curious to those of you who were baptised as JWs and who have left the organization, but still consider yourselves Christians, do you consider your baptism valid? How many of you out there felt the need to be rebaptised?

RA

20

Question for Any current Elders or recently departed elders

by geevee in

i have been asked about a situation in which a former witnesses ladies now ex-husband has been caught exposing himself, and this has gone on for at least 15 years.

he has also exposed himself to some close family members.

the question relates to the wt explaination of "porniea".

RaraAvis

What he's doing is a crime and should be reported to the authorities.

Yes it is and yes he should. Why hasn't he been reported to the authorities? Seriously.

15

So my undercover "exposing the lies" is still working

by BonaFide in

yesterday in the car group in service, 5 of us in one suv.

so someone says that on friday, a worldly family member of their bible study had died of a drug overdose.

then he said, "well, that the protection that we have being in jehovah's organization.".

RaraAvis

178

Why is Jesus kept side stage ?

by iknowall558 in

john 5 :39 ' 40 "you study the scriptures, because you think that in them you will find eternal life.

and these very scriptures speak about me!

yet you are not willing to come to me in order to have life.

RaraAvis

Ren believes she has "the truth." She feels strongly enough about her beliefs to visit an apostate website and try to convince those who have left the organization she still has "the truth." I feel really sad for her, because she is so close-minded.

That is the saddest part in my opinion, because before a person learns all this witness bs, they were open-minded enough to listen. And usually it is because of their love for God, their interest in pleasing God, and desire to praise God, that leads them to listen in the first place. So there they are, open-minded, and wanting to do what is right. And then they become completely mind-twisted, to the point their minds are so closed and sealed air-tight. No longer a need for an open-mind, in fact the exact opposite. They are completely convinced they have "the truth" they forget where they were once. They ignore the things that bother their conscience and they continue to convince themselves using which ever "truth" convinced them the most. They ignore the big picture.

Fear of being wrong; fear - in my opinion is what leads many to a site like this. Because we have doubts about other things we start upholding the things that may have truly convinced us we had the truth. Instead we have to look at the things we have doubts about, not the things we feel rock solid on. It is only in the JW organization, you are not allowed to have differing, personal beliefs.

Our spiritual beliefs are personal, between God, and Christ. It is offensive to me when we force those beliefs on others. I spent a lifetime doing that, and have no desire to continue. I become skeptical everytime someone tries to talk me into or out of something. Thank you for that WTBTS!

I feel love and open-mindedness goes a long way.

Ren, so I can tell there are several doctrinal issues you feel strongly about. Surely there are some witness teachings that make you wonder. I would like to know what those are.

:) RA

11

So what happened in 1995?

by RaraAvis in

i keep reading about new light or some big change in 1995. i left in 92, so what is everyone referring to?.

ra.

RaraAvis

I keep reading about new light or some big change in 1995. I left in 92, so what is everyone referring to?

RA

29

Why do they never invite you for a meal but always encourage you to attend meetings?

by truthseeker in

jw
friends

today, an elder in my hall phoned and left a message saying he would stop by with a memorial invitation.. this elder has never bothered to encourage me in the past when i was missing meetings, yet suddenly he remembers me in the run up to the memorial.. i got to thinking about this - a few in our congregation called us when they found out we were inactive, encouraging us to go back to meetings.

or they would say, "it's the co visit next week, you have to come listen to his talk.".

i would give these "genuine ones" their due - they made an effort - but, when i think about it what effort have they actually made?.

RaraAvis

well they are "friends" after all.

29

Why do they never invite you for a meal but always encourage you to attend meetings?

by truthseeker in

jw
friends

today, an elder in my hall phoned and left a message saying he would stop by with a memorial invitation.. this elder has never bothered to encourage me in the past when i was missing meetings, yet suddenly he remembers me in the run up to the memorial.. i got to thinking about this - a few in our congregation called us when they found out we were inactive, encouraging us to go back to meetings.

or they would say, "it's the co visit next week, you have to come listen to his talk.".

i would give these "genuine ones" their due - they made an effort - but, when i think about it what effort have they actually made?.

RaraAvis

I stopped going to meetings and boom I no longer existed. Until 7 years later I got a phone call. "We would like to disfellowship you."

24

My mom- and Hi! I am new here.

by RaraAvis in

jw
friends

i have been reading this site for a while now but have never posted.

i am an ex-pioneer, who left the organization 15 years ago.

i served as a need-greater in a foreign country and when i came back i walked away.

RaraAvis

Hi everyone,

I have been reading this site for a while now but have never posted. I am an ex-pioneer, who left the organization 15 years ago. I served as a need-greater in a foreign country and when I came back I walked away. I was born in and it took a long time to feel okay and actually feel "normal" for lack of a better word.

My mother is still very active, a reg pioneer and today I helped her move. I felt an intense amount of sadness when I helped her pack away her old books and her old bound volumes, and her years of collecting this stuff. She has had it forever and it just hit me how this is her life. Her and her witness friends are just dying to live. Wasting precious years of life, in hope of the reward of life. It is sickening. So there they were, pages and pages of mind-forming, brainwashing literature. I asked her why she hasn't thrown it out, since all the stuff is mostly on discs now. But it is sacrilegious I guess.

sad.

RA