wantstoleave

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Posts by wantstoleave

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  13

  Has anyone dealt with custody issues after leaving?

  by ~Jen~ in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i left my husband at the end of june.

  we were having a lot of issues in our marriage that i tried to talk about and he refused to see or even acknowledge.

  me leaving was the final straw but to him i just up and left for "no reason".

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  wantstoleave

  Sounds like the lawyer is playing mind games. Also, go with your gut feeling. If you think your ex is telling lies, then he probably is. Mine did it to me, the worst garbage you could ever think of - and I was still a witness! If you know you've done nothing wrong, then don't sweat it. Hang tight. Make sure you've told your lawyer everything. Keep all documents, they will come in handy. The supporting evidence such as Doctor and employment records will be a lifesaver. A judge cant grant him things on the basis of you not being a witness, that would be ludicrous. So just sit tight, stay calm and if you come into contact with him before it goes to court, be wise with your words - he may just be taping you or having someone watch so they can be a 'witness' to your manner and actions.

  You said you talked to him at a meeting. Are you looking to be reinstated?

  Wishing you all the best...my turn for similar is next month.
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  20

  ELDERS CAUGHT IN EMBASSERING SITUATIONS

  by badboy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  know of any cases?.

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  wantstoleave

  Thanks Dissed :) Not out of line at all. In some ways I have felt like a weight has been lifted these past few days, just by getting to know people just like me, who feel the same way. Im not familiar with Educating Rita....lol
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  39

  So you're out - first thing you did was.....

  by wantstoleave in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  did you 'break the rules' full force?

  did you go celebrate a birthday?

  buy xmas decorations?

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  wantstoleave

  Thanks for sharing everyone :)
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  5

  A Follow-Up Question?

  by AK - Jeff in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  since starting this thread:.

  http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/181969/1/do-you-have-many-friends-since-leaving-the-borg.

  i see a pattern that is interesting.

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  wantstoleave

  I would say yes, in a sense, I was a loner - but made to be, not because I wanted to. I never fit 'in' with the cliques in the KH. I know cliques are found everywhere, but I was never fully accepted into any group within congregations. Yet worldly wise, I was always able to find friends, though never allowed to associate with them outside of school/work. I was not the rebellious type, so I didnt have an independant spirit. I just didnt get along that great with girls...lol. And I wasnt allowed to hang out with boys, so that was the dilemma. But it wasnt for lack of trying.

  I tried SO hard to fit in with this and that group. I did pioneer hours at one stage, in an effort to fit in with that clique, but they never took me on board. I was alright as a partner when they needed to get their hours, but not ok to hang out with after service. That led to a VERY lonely existence within 'the truth'. I had noone but my siblings, and thats no way for a child/adolescent to grow up. While I loved my siblings, teens also need that outside influence from their home life. I didnt have it, though I wanted it badly.

  I had no social life whatsoever. Id hear about congregation outings after the fact, things like that. Yet, noone had any reason not to invite me. I was doing everything right spiritually. I was a friendly person, noone disliked me....they just didnt like me enough to want to associate with me. Maybe they saw me as a threat, I dont know.

  To this day, I dont have any social life...lol. I have children to care for, and I have to work practically full time to support them. I dont have babysitters even if I did want to go out because I only have my family, and if they watch my kids during the day while I work, I dont want to burden them with babysitting them on weekends etc.
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  55

  DO JWS REALLY WAIT TIL MARRIAGE???

  by sweet in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  do jws really wait til marriage to have sex?.

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  wantstoleave

  Virgo, my marriage was so different in that respect. We were 3x a day, everyday for the first 2yrs of marriage and then for the last years, it was once a day.....(we had 2 kids by then) but I drew the line at during my period, even though he would pressure me on occasion! Noone ever gave me any kind of 'sex talk' prior to getting married, not even my mom. I had grown up a witness, and was heading into unknown territory....but I wasnt scared. I was 24 and eager to have sex, though that wasnt what made me marry him...but it was a big contributing factor! Thankfully he wasnt a prude, nor was I....and things were great in that respect. Unfortunately, the rest of the relationship left a lot to be desired :s
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  29

  Thoughts on NOT dating

  by wantstoleave in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  just throwing some thoughts out there.

  wondering if anyone feels the same as i do.

  you know, being brought up not being allowed to date until you were 'of marrying age'.

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  wantstoleave

  Scully, great thoughts!
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  39

  So you're out - first thing you did was.....

  by wantstoleave in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  did you 'break the rules' full force?

  did you go celebrate a birthday?

  buy xmas decorations?

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  wantstoleave

  Black sheep, I think I mentioned something to that effect earlier in the thread or somewhere else on here (lol Ive lost track!)........I remember a few years back the elders saying from the platform that we were now permitted to enter the polling booth, take the paper and if we wanted, to scribble all over it, or mark it so incorrectly that the vote was invalid. We were told though, not to vote. Thanks for sharing the article :)
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  57

  A Conversation That Sent Me On a Search ...

  by snowbird in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  in 2000, my boss, a police lieutenant, was nearing retirement and had very little work to do.. every afternoon, he used to come out of his office and station himself near my workstation for a chat.

  there was something about me that seemed to fascinate him.

  i think it was my being a jw; he used to ask probing questions about my belief.. one day our conversation centered on sin and judgment.

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  wantstoleave

  Tigeress, Ive always heard that the likes of Hitler wont be resurrected. At least thats the consensus in my area, because he directly attacked the witnesses. Not saying this is what I believe, just what Ive heard growing up....that people who outwardly, openly mock and cause trouble for witnesses, if they die, apparently wont be resurrected.
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  20

  ELDERS CAUGHT IN EMBASSERING SITUATIONS

  by badboy in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  know of any cases?.

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  wantstoleave

  Worst case I can think of is a fairly recent one in my area. One of those holier than thou type elders. Married, grown kids....very zealous. He got done for sleeping with a Pioneer sister not so long ago. Apparently they'd been together on the sly for 20yrs! He'd been serving as an elder the entire time. So, his wife divorces him. Six months go by, both he and the Pioneer are reinstated, then they promptly announce they're getting married and you guessed it - the congregation is invited......right under the nose of his ex wife. Thats the kind of double standard I detest.
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  13

  Congregation "Bible Study" Comments - Week Commencing 21 September 2009

  by LUKEWARM in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  *** lv chap.

  10 pp.

  110-120 marriage-a gift from a loving god ***.

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  wantstoleave

  Very good topic