The new family book briefly mentions that if necessary one should seek out side help for alcoholism or drug addiction. However, they don't endorse an outside enterprise such as AA. (AA does not either) Of course every elder has his own ideas about alcohol consumption and tries to press it on the congregations. Usually it's to NOT seek outside help but to just cut back on drinking. As if an alcoholic has control over his consumption.
The last shepherding call we had about 6-7 yrs ago lead to an argument with the elder about this. This elder is a drinker and I know this from his wife making a comment about how he has to have a bottle of Scotch after a JC. Then his wife is so numb from all the wine she drinks; I'm not sure if she is alive. I feel like saying to her "hey are you still in there." I had been a vocal advocate for education and outside assistance in the congregation. So you know they hated me..LOL I think they kept their children away from me because I would encourage and support their ideas about education.
There is so much untreated alcoholism and so many adult children of alcoholic parents that never sought treatment in the congs. I can't stand to be around them. It's such a non-nurturing atmosphere as a result of not seeking treatment. Alcoholism is the source of all the judgmental behavior in the congregations.
I know of one chance the elders had to help someone in our congregation but this is what these morons did: They counseled this sister because she complained about her husabnds drinking.
She and her 'brother' husband have had separate bedrooms for 18 yrs. (By his choice) In his closet he has a
cooler of beer, empty bottles all over his stinking room and a piss pot in the corner so she can't see him stumbling to the bathroom. The elders were aware of this and all they said was "get rid of the cooler." He did for a short time but it's still there.
This sister mentioned something about his drinking too much and him smelling like smoke. He was DF'd for smoking once before. She just hated how he claimed to be a JW while he was running around with gang members, drinking, doing drugs and committing adultery. She felt he was bringing reproach on Jehovah's name especially, since people in their town talked about him. He lied and denied all to the elders and they proceeded to accuse her of slander. Well, flash forward about 8 years later she is in the DR's office with her husband and the DR says, "Your husband really needs to quit smoking." Busted! These moron elders even had him doing prayers and recommended him for MS. lol The, CO denied it because he was Df'd only a few yr. earlier. He is still a JW in good standing even with his cooler in the closet full of booze. They could have helped him at the time and counseled him to get some help for his drinking but they didn't and he is a very sick man now. He's intolerable to live with as nasty drunk. I've seen him in action with his nasty comments to his wife. Living with a drunk is really hell.
They don't want to help anyone. They just want to put on a show to pretend everybody in the congregation perfect. They are so overwhelmed with Adult Children of Alcoholic( ACOA ) behaviors that they think it's normal.
Edited by - imbue on 15 June 2002 15:21:15
