Posts by Introspection

46

Here is something to debate!

by Aztec in

jw
friends

does true love exist?.

i'm a skeptic by nature, although not necessarily a very logical one.

i believe in love but i am not sure of the idea of one true love or soulmates.

To answer the question of soulmate it would seem we need to know what a soul is. I'm not going to quote the dictionary or anything, but for the purpose of what we're discussing, and logic would just require that it has to be a permanent, unchanging thing wouldn't it? I think once you are with somebody you can become more of a mate for each other, but in terms of how well two people match each other it seems only reasonable that you can only qualify that with a given point in time, if we're talking about something that does change.

As far as love at first site goes, mine was www.hottysoulmate.com - but no seriously.. (couldn't resist when I saw the way site was spelled ) I have seen it twice, but I'm not talking about romantic attraction, although it is what I'd call true love. (of course, even romantic attraction is true love in the sense that true love is everything, but by itself it wouldn't qualify for the title in my book) To be more precise I should say I have seen it in two people. In one case the person was a woman, and it's the funniest thing - after seeing her the second day I had a feeling of overflow, and that I would never need to see her again. The feeling is the sense that I don't need her to feel complete or whole, but rather being around her I am simply reminded that I am already complete and whole. Incidentally I have seen her again, but even when she was in the area for .. about 4 days I only went to see her once, I didn't need to see her every one of those days. As it is I didn't talk to her all that much the night I saw her, I literally spoke only a few sentences. The love I am talking about here is a mutual recognition of the same thing in each other, not an 'opposites attract' kind of deal. Having someone like that as a life partner would be nice, but in perhaps a strange way that's not necessary either. The thing is this is not something that depends on what kind of relationship you have, because to relate would require difference. It isn't even an attraction of two pieces that would fit together nicely, but rather the feeling is that you have the same heart. Even with some passionate lovers there is often this feeling of ever closing the gap, being closer. What I'm saying is this feeling is that there is no gap.

3

Fake your way into being happy

by RubyTuesday in

http://content.health.msn.com/content/article/61/67430.htm

unhappy?

try acting like an extrovert .

Introspection

Well, the first question that comes to mind here is does that mean you get fake happiness when you fake a certain way of behavior?

It seems to me it's all a matter of how deep you go. Toward the end of the article it says to a certain extent we have control over our personalities. Well who or what has control over the personality?? In any case, I guess what they're talking about is feeling good, but I say being happy implies a bit more than just feeling good. I don't think I can really be happy unless I am being myself, but I can certainly see how even if someone acts differently than how they actually are they may feel good temporarily.

What if you're dealing with someone who is happy being an introvert? I mean frankly everybody is kind of a different distribution of both, but obviously it would just be unnatural for someone who tends to prefer solitude to act like the life of the party all the time. Besides, people tend to know that you are faking it if they are really paying attention, and frankly even when it's real some people don't care for extroverts, so how would the person faking being extroverted feel when they run into people like that? People aren't always happy to see someone who's a happy freak, my guess is they would just see the freakiness of it, especially when it is faked.

Let me ask you this: Would you have a better sex life if you faked orgasms all the time? You would think that if someone can change how they feel by acting a different way then they would see those feelings, good or bad wasn't all that real in the first place, or atleast are transitory at best. The problem is changing your mental (not big on cultivating beliefs either) or physical behavior only goes so far, because behavior only goes so far. Instead of asking what kind of behavior can make you happy, they should be asking what can manifest that behavior - otherwise behavior modification only becomes a type of horizontal movement, and it's all too easy for something else to come along and change it yet again.

What this article talks about is affecting your happiness (or whatever it is they're calling happiness) from the outside in, whereas I think what is deeper is when someone can manifest something from the inside out. Actually, they are also saying it comes from inside out, it just goes back to the question of what is controlling that behavior in the first place? When you go from that place to controlling external behavior (*acting extroverted) and then turn back to some type of emotional happiness, you've basically turned around in a big circle and gone back from the outside to inside, haven't you? I guess that may need to happen if you think being happy involves things looking a certain way. I'm not all that keen on positive affirmations and such, but atleast that addresses things a little more directly through language, rather than kind of going out a ways and coming back in through external behavior. It would seem that maybe the assumption is that happiness depends on how you interact with other people, and I just don't buy that. If anything, I'd say if it depends on an external stimuli then even if you feel happy, that happiness is not 'yours'. This kind of happiness would be just more horizontal movement of one behavior affecting another, and that certainly can't last long.

"I'm good enough, smart enough, and doggone it, people like me!" -Stuart Smalley

* edited to add ..

13

"Lord Lord did we not prophesy in your name and expel demons in your name?"

by truthseeker in

jw
friends

i would like to know if anyone can help me with this question.

presumably in the last days when jesus arrives as judge and executioner, he says the famous scripture, "many will say to me in that day, lord, lord, did we not prophesy in your name and expel demons in your name and perform many powerful works in your name?

and then i will confess to them, 'i never knew you, get away from me you workers of lawlessness'".

Introspection

In case it wasn't clear - you can atleast see how when someone believes they are doing something in Jesus name is different from when they are actually doing it, which would correspond with the scrip in Mark 9 ..

13

"Lord Lord did we not prophesy in your name and expel demons in your name?"

by truthseeker in

jw
friends

i would like to know if anyone can help me with this question.

presumably in the last days when jesus arrives as judge and executioner, he says the famous scripture, "many will say to me in that day, lord, lord, did we not prophesy in your name and expel demons in your name and perform many powerful works in your name?

and then i will confess to them, 'i never knew you, get away from me you workers of lawlessness'".

Introspection

Lets see.. Well I find it significant that in the beginning of Matthew 7 it talks about not judging others, although to me that is not just a negative statement. There was another thread where those first few verses were discussed, but the point I'm making here is that judging requires a subjective mental framework, a filter through which you see things. So we can see how this could be the case with those that thought they did all these great things in Jesus name, they may have really believed in what they were doing, but apparently belief is not where it's at.

Without really going into the subject of viewing what Jesus was saying literally or personally, it's probably helpful to note that in the first case it was the 'workers of lawlessness' who thought they were doing things in Jesus name, in the second case it is Jesus who was making that statement. To me 'knowing' Jesus in the personal sense is irrelevant, I know people who are basically on the ball spiritually and I don't need to know anything about their personal life, those are just details that aren't particularly relevant. So to me it isn't even a question of denomination, different religions (though it helps not to take religion too seriously) is not really important either, in fact in light of the first paragraph I would say it is more likely for a person's belief structure to hinder them spiritually, whether they call themselves Christians is not particularly relevant as the scripture points out.

Incidentally, in terms of casting out demons I would say it's a matter of seeing through them - that they are not real. If there is a factor of clear seeing then that has to be what it means, then again in my world egos aren't real either, but that's another story.. Basically I am talking about what is ultimately real, both of these things are only relatively real.

35

The PO and CO visit me....new light!!??

by truman in

jw
friends

i am just going to have to start keeping my front door closed.

today, i had it open, and there was no way to pretend i wasn't home when the two 'brothers' rang my door bell.

actually, they had been by last saturday, too, but the door was closed that day, and i didn't answer it.

Introspection

He said that it was reasonable to expect little penetration into areas such as China and the Moslem countries, because these cultures had never even been receptive to the growth of 'false' Christianity, how then would it be reasonably expected that they could likely grow 'true' Christianity.

Let me get this straight - you have to accept the false version to accept the true version? What kinda logic is that??

There's speculation on all levels I would imagine, or guesses basically - the society can guess or use world events to explain the prophecies and the individuals can speculate on what they'll officially adopt as the new understanding, but that doesn't change the fact that it's the blind leading the blind.

"Oh my god, what if they have it right now ?"

When you keep guessing eventually you may hit upon something just because your chances will increase as your guesses mount, it doesen't mean there is much intelligence behind it.

65

What are you currently reading?

by Sirona in

jw
friends

as ex-dubs we are free to read whatever the hell we want to read.

in celebration of that fact (and to give me some ideas on what to read next .

sirona

Introspection

Well, I was reading Why Religion Matters by Huston Smith, but frankly in spite of the fact that I enjoyed The World's Religions in college I find him a bit long winded, and I'm not sure if it matters if I finish it. I also picked up Boomeritis by Ken Wilbur, and not only am I not particularly interested in fiction these days, but I am also kind of bored with him to be honest. I think I may be getting more impatient in my old age, some people do have interesting things to say but they just take so dang long to say it.. Maybe I should go get some Cliff notes?

35

Easy, sleazy bimbos

by YoursChelbie in

jw
friends

they're in the work place, at social gatherings.

they are just about everywhere that men are--- including the internet.

they hit on single men, married men, old and young.

Introspection

In reading Katie's post it became clear to me it's actually very simple. YoursChelbie you said:

Does the whole matter depend on the extent of his love and devotion to his significant other?

A question you have to ask is, was the relationship actually based on love and devotion in the first place? (for him that is) Or is it about how someone else makes you feel? If it's just about how you feel, then of course when someone new and exciting comes along you'll go for it, because it's really about you feeling good.

Now mind you, I don't say this as if to say how bad that person is, or even that they are weak and insecure - but it could literally be a matter of not knowing any better. What I mean by that is basically an inability to see beyond a narrow scope of awareness, the big breasts that are in front of you at the moment for example - although that would present a pull for most men, most men will also think twice for various reasons not limited to an existing relationship, if for no other reason than to think it's too good to be true. You can't have love for someone if you're not even aware of them, so I'm not even talking about just being aware of a rule of not cheating or whatever, but loving someone as they are. The easiest way to give in to sexual temptation or anything is for your attention to be so narrow as to block out everything else, so that only the craving exists in your world at the moment, and from there it's simply a logical move to satisfy that craving through what's immediately available.

But anyway, the point is if it's a matter of feeling good, then is it really any surprise that they go to someone else? It's like a new drug dealer or something, their stuff is better - or atleast easily accessible.

8

Romans 14,

by l3gi0n in

what is your thought on romans 14?

is only about food, or could you use it to argue it that you can celebrate thanksgiving, xmas.

maybe it is ok if a woman dose not wear a hat when praying and so on, if it dose not bother you.

Introspection

Is only about food, or could you use it to argue it that you can celebrate thanksgiving, Xmas.

Hmm, I'm surprised I hadn't come across the connection with holidays before. But yeah, I mean considering what 14:14 says: "...nothing is defiled in itself; only where a man considers something to be defiled, to him it is defiled." I remember when I was first studying and this big shot PO in the area (not just big shot in that congregation that is) was telling me a very liberal interpretation of celebrating Christmas, (though he was generally considered old school) like oh well if they invite you to a party at work but you didn't do any X-masy thing then who's to say that's celebrating, funny now that I think back about it. I remember 1 Cor. 8 being another explanation for conscience matters, too. Now there it makes the point about meat sacrificed to idols - you take that and consider what Romans 14:14 says and I think you can begin to put 2 and 2 together. Idolatry is about a state of mind, it's not a matter of what the thing is - anything can be an idol. It's a matter of being in delusion.

35

Easy, sleazy bimbos

by YoursChelbie in

jw
friends

they're in the work place, at social gatherings.

they are just about everywhere that men are--- including the internet.

they hit on single men, married men, old and young.

Introspection

What are you following through on? Are you already in a sexual realtionship with her? If not then your a free agent. How does she fell about you? Is she following through with it? Sounds like to me you have strong feelings for her already. True?

Yes Mecurious there is strong feelings, though I'm actually not attached. I guess I'm just seeing where things go. The feelings are mutual, but it is really still in the early stages. By this I don't mean being passive as if I'm waiting around, but I am actually seeing what comes naturally.

I don't want to hijack here, so in terms of what we're talking about I would have to go back to my point about integrity, and for me that's what it means. I am certainly free as we all are, and I choose to go at it one at a time - actually I don't think I could do otherwise, I think that's what comes naturally and I'm probably hardwired that way. It used to be that I thought it might be cool to be a wild and swinging guy, but as I aged and learned more about myself I see that just isn't me. So not only am I following through in this particular relationship, I am following through on my own nature actually. I will say this though, obviously if the other person doesn't feel this way then it's pretty much incompatible, and if that proves to be the case then maybe I will try for a long distance relationship with a guru.

35

Easy, sleazy bimbos

by YoursChelbie in

jw
friends

they're in the work place, at social gatherings.

they are just about everywhere that men are--- including the internet.

they hit on single men, married men, old and young.

Introspection

What ultimately prevents a "taken" man from giving in to a sleazy woman's advances?

Of course this depends on the man, but I would say it's a matter of integrity. From this perspective you really have to back up a step though, because frankly anyone who gives in really gives in to their own impulses, what I'm saying is for someone who's integrity includes being monogamous and also just not giving in to sex by itself, then giving in to your sex drive to the exclusion of other considerations like what kind of person this is and that you're already involved in a relationship and so on is just not going to cut it.

It's funny that sometimes it sounds good to the mind, but what I've found is in practice sometimes physically attractive people who flirts with you is actually not that sexy for some reason. The conclusion I've come to is that mental/emotional masturbation precedes physical sex, and this only means that even if you're having sex with someone a large part of it is your own mind. So from that perspective, it's like you're just masturbating with a partner, the fact that there is physical contact doesn't really mean you've engaged the person, there's probably not that much intimacy in the true sense of the word. You're basically in a trance.

So I would say the mind plays a big part and is very powerful, although as a side note I've found that there are different types of attraction too. My experience these days is that although there may be sexual attraction to someone that is physically attractive, and perhaps reasonably considered a strong attraction, it is qualitatively different from attractions that is deeper in nature. I recently met this woman who's a spiritual teacher, and although she's fairly good looking physically there's something that blows sexual attraction out of the water - last time I saw her I hardly said anything, we looked each other in the eyes for about 5 seconds and that was about it. Even so I am having some second thoughts about pursuing anything, it so happens that I have been pursuing something with another woman - and although there's no commitment there I just feel I should follow through with it. From the man-whore school of thought I suppose this makes me somewhat handicapped in terms of frequency of having sex, but that's just the way I am.