My boyfriend is bisexual and I am . . . attracted to women. There are no rules to cover gender and friendships. In a healthy relationship, you can accept that your partner is with you because they choose to be. If they cheat on you either something is wrong with that person or something is wrong with your relationship. To me, arguing that people shouldn't be friends with someone they might possibly be attracted to is analogous to the reasoning Muslims use in covering up their women. The answer to temptation (for healthy individualsl; this doesn't fit for an addictive personality) is not to avoid it at all costs, but to exercise self-restraint.
bluecanary
JoinedPosts by bluecanary
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17
Friendship with the opposite sex
by LoriJis ini have to ask a personal questions.
do you think it is ok to have a friendship with someone of the opposite sex if you are in a serious relationship or married?
nothing intimate just friendship.
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Watchtower 1974- Obviously a Bethelite writes all fat people who eat more than others will be destroyed!!!
by Witness 007 inbethel lunchtime....their is always a young brother who eats more potatoes or chicken etc.
leaving the plate empty and others from his table scrounging from other "less hungry" tables.
so some writer with a chip on his shoulder writes this article.. watchtower 1974 p.167 "glutton...fails to show love for jehovah.
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bluecanary
Oh, don't worry, iknowall. We were marked. The only fat sisters who had husbands gained the weight after the marriage.
Gluttony and being fat (while sometimes correlated) are two different things.
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this is horrible
by recovering in<object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/be9thbvgqca&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_us&feature=player_embedded&fs=1"></param><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/be9thbvgqca&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_us&feature=player_embedded&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowscriptaccess="always" width="640" height="385"></embed></object>.
not witness but this video made my skin crawl.
sorry about the formatting , just click the link.
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33
My first experience at a Christian church--for what it's worth
by bluecanary ini am dating an advent christian (very similar to baptist).
i went to church with him for the first time yesterday.
i was pleased that he wanted me there because it's nice to be included in things that are meaningful to him.
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bluecanary
Were you a JW thomas? (I can't figure out how to ask that question without it sounding snarky. I just want to know how much experience you have attending a KH.)
I'm referring to the way all the Bibles and publications are produced by the Society. In the old days you had to purchase them. Now you are expected to give an undetermined donation for them (which I suspect actually makes them more money) and of course, they're constantly coming out with more publications that you will need. Every member of the family is expected to own their own copy. We had an enormous briefcase full of books and magazines for a family of four.
Everyone had their own song book, Bible, ministry school book, watchtower, kingdom ministry and whatever book we were covering at the bookstudy. In addition, a family might carry with them a reference Bible, All Scriptures Inspired book, Organized to Accomplish our Ministry book (or whatever they're calling these days), Reasoning book and any other book that may be pertinent to this particular meeting. This is what people carry back and forth to the meetings.
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bluecanary
ps: I agree with you Blue Canary. Child care, done well, is difficult and demanding and should pay more. Unfortunately it has to be cost effective for other parents to hire childcare otherwise they would do better to stay home.
Right. I just read that in other countries, universal, voluntary preschool is available and subsidized by their governments. In the US, we just don't place that much importance on it. Parents are left to find what they can afford and children get bounced through a network of family, sitters and center care--which isn't good for their cognitive and emotional development.
But I digress.
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33
My first experience at a Christian church--for what it's worth
by bluecanary ini am dating an advent christian (very similar to baptist).
i went to church with him for the first time yesterday.
i was pleased that he wanted me there because it's nice to be included in things that are meaningful to him.
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bluecanary
I'd love to go to a black church! Maybe I can convince my BF to try one next time.
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bluecanary
Wow, so far I'm the poorest person on the thread. I'm working on an associate's degree in Early Childhood Development. The US does NOT value early childcare workers. They average about $325 per week. It works out in my favor that I don't have to go to school longer (or at all, but I'll feel better having a degree and training) but it sucks that you don't make much money at a job that's so fundamentally important. I earned more money waiting tables.
I'd like to go to school longer but I'm getting older. I'd like to have kids and I'd like to be home with those kids so this field will work best for me. Plus teaching young children lets me feel like I'm making a meaningful contribution to society.
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33
My first experience at a Christian church--for what it's worth
by bluecanary ini am dating an advent christian (very similar to baptist).
i went to church with him for the first time yesterday.
i was pleased that he wanted me there because it's nice to be included in things that are meaningful to him.
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bluecanary
I am an atheist/pseudo-Buddhist. I am dating an Advent Christian (very similar to Baptist). I went to church with him for the first time yesterday. I was pleased that he wanted me there because it's nice to be included in things that are meaningful to him. My only other church experience was at a Universalist Unitarian service. I found the two to be very similar. Doctrine is the only substantial difference.
We arrived a few minutes late and the first thing that struck me was the way the minister was directly interacting with the audience. In discussing a few matters about the church and congregation he spoke directly to and about particular members. Everyone was laughing at some humor I didn't pick up on. I can't say I've never seen that in a KH, but it was exceedingly rare.
The minister used peoples first names or even nicknames; Bob, Jimbo. The JWs call each other brother or sister. This fools the person into feeling like part of a family while effectively removing their individuality. Specific individuals who were going through hardships were mentioned and we were asked to pray for them or offer aid.
The most obvious difference was the format. The audience sang hymns (that were very similar in tone to the kingdom melodies). In addition we listened to a song from the choir and two performances from individual women. One performance was to a more modern song with a pop rock sound.
Four prayers were said, throughout. My boyfriend had his arm around me the entire time. Before one prayer, the minister asked people to hold hands with their loved ones. I looked around and saw not just husbands and wives but parents and children, siblings and friends holding hands. Quite a contrast from the JWs who have been counseled against such displays of affection.
The padded pews were comfortable and allowed for sitting closely with family. The church was decorated in a very simple and dignified manner. Nothing like the hideous décor that KHs are designed with. There were Bibles and hymnals available at all the seats. I don't think anyone would mind if someone just sat and read from the Bible throughout the service. There was no need to feel left out or go to a special service counter to get the materials needed for the service. There was no need to purchase materials (through donation or otherwise) and lug them back and forth from your home.
The sermon was much more brief than the sessions the JWs have but it puts the lie to the claim that the churches are all entertainment and no teaching. I am in college and the teachers do not teach anything like the JW style. They lecture for an hour at most. Much of it involves student interaction and group work. Students must be interested and actively engaged in order to learn. The droning repetition of the JWs serves only to hypnotize and indoctrinate.
The sermon was about "the cross." This is apparently their term for Jesus sacrificial death. He talked about how the disciples didn't want to accept that Jesus needed to do this. That they, like people today, had an attitude of, "no I'd rather you not have to do that. Don't go to all that trouble; I'll take care of it myself." The point was that this attitude was unnecessary because Jesus had taken care of it (whatever it is) so there is nothing we need to do in order to earn salvation. The JWs pay lip service to this, but are quick to point out the many, many things you need to do in order to earn that salvation. It's all academic to me, since I believe the Bible to be a work of fiction, but interesting nonetheless.
The minister spoke from the Bible and invited others to follow along or read it in their own time. A few outside publications were quoted from but there was no book or magazine that was held remotely as prominent as the Bible.
A collections plate was passed around. I had the same experience at the UU church and I came to the conclusion then that passing the plate was more loving than having the box at the back of the KH. Most people put in a couple of dollars. About $2 per person. If I go to church every weekend, I'll end up paying $8-10 per month. At my poorest, I never put less than $20 a month in the KH. I knew others, also financially strapped, who put in much more. When you know everyone else is putting their $2 in you don't feel guilted into putting in more. There may be some churches out there that guilt their members into giving more but this is hardly the case at all, or I would guess even most churches.
The people were friendly. This is not my BF's usual church (he lives out of town) and several people welcomed us and asked us to return. Everyone was dressed casually but dignified. They do their own church maintenance like the JWs.
All in all it was a pleasant enough experience. I am happy to support my wonderful BF in his beliefs. And it really shows the JWs to be slanderous liars about other religions.
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bluecanary
I deliver pizzas in the southeast US. I get $7.50 an hour while I'm at the store. While I'm on a delivery I get $4 per hour. Drivers average $3 in tips per run at my store. Of course, that fluxuates all the time. The other night I took 13 runs and got tipped for six of them.
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Pedophiles in your congregation??
by ziddina ini'm listening to the "six screens of the watchtower" broadcast from october 25, 2008 [yeah, i know, i'm waaay behind...], discussing pedophilia... that broadcast caused me to look up the current status of 'pedophilia notification' in the u.s.a..... rebel8 posted a link sometime back that gave locations of pedophiles in one's (u.s.a.) neighborhood... that portion of the link is, unfortunately, not working right now.... i decided to check out my [old] site, http://www.nsopw.gov/core/offendersearchcriteria.aspx to see if it still functioned the same way.... again, unfortunately, that site is also no longer giving out maps of one's area.... but, as pointed out in rebel8's posted link, pedophiles tend to move around.
this was also mentioned in the six screens broadcast by a lady named "lilly".... the new versions of both sites simply allow one to input the name of someone suspected to be a pedophile... not as effective, imo, but perhaps the cost of updating the maps due to pedophiles' high mobility became prohibitive.. so, here's my suggestion... using the 'name' search function, check out every name in .
your congregation, starting with the elders!!!.
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bluecanary
Hi, Jordan. I posted this on another thread you were on but figured you probably missed it. I posted a thread a while back that discusses what, for me, is the reason I can't believe the JWs are the true religion. I'd love to get your thoughts on the subject, if you're so inclined. Welcome to the board.