Jankyn

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Posts by Jankyn

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  34

  brutalized toddlers

  by little witch in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  does anyone remember the advice from from the stage, encouraging mothers to remove babies from the room when they were hungry?.

  how about, wooden spoons to beat toddlers into submission, preferably in front of the congegation, as to set an example in disipline?

  was this just in our hall, or was it from the borg?

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  Jankyn

  Let's see...as a child, I had wood spoons, rulers and plastic hairbrushes broken on my butt & legs. I recall being slapped so hard that I got nosebleeds, and one time my mother sent a tooth flying (at least it was a baby tooth, already loose). I had JW babysitters who felt perfectly welcome to use belts to punish me for whatever infraction of the myriads and myriads of rules I had committed (My mother had to work, and wouldn't leave us with a "worldly" sitter. I was quickly "marked" as a problem child--mostly because my dad had been disfellowshipped). And the wonderful brothers in our congregation had a paint-stirring stick in the ladies' room that mothers could use on children who wouldn't behave in the meetings.

  I don't know of a single family in the congregation that I grew up in that did not use physical punishment to the point of--past the point of--abuse. And that doesn't even begin to cover the emotional and psychological abuse.

  Of course, this was in the mid to late 1960s. I don't know that even the JWs believe this is okay these days. At least, I hope not.

  Jankyn, recovering class
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  16

  MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

  by sisteract in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  just got home a short while ago after visiting a couple of local kingdom halls.

  yep, left them a "present" a little lamb with a note regarding the "silenced lambs" and the silent lambs web site.

  they'll be there to greet the pioneers and publishers for their early morning field service meeting.

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  Jankyn

  I'd advocate against the use of the slogan "Slam bam thank you lamb," simply because it's a play on a common saying with a lot of sexual innuendo. It could easily be perceived as insensitive to the pain of the silent lambs survivors, and might also be perceived as trivializing the issue and movement as a whole.

  Respectfully,

  Jankyn
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  16

  Childhood Misconceptions

  by Big Tex in

  1. social
  2. humour

  when i was a kid, i kind of lived in my own world.

  i thought i knew everything, but as i grew older i realized my biggest problem was that i only halfway paid attention to the world.

  and the bathroom was on the right of what?

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  Jankyn

  I, too, had trouble with that Xmas carol. I thought Hark was the name of a hairy angel..."Hark the hairy angel sings..."

  It's not that my hearing was bad; it's that I was sitting in the hall outside the classroom during music because all they ever sang was holiday songs of one sort or another!

  Jankyn, good ears class
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  7

  Extraordinary Groups

  by Larry in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i just finished a book entitled "extraordinary groups - an examination of unconventional life styles," by william m. kephart & william w. zellner (1991).

  of course the borg was mentioned, but before i get into that i just want to thank ???

  ( i forgot her name) for mentioning the oneida community in a previous thread, which sparked my interest in that community and lead to the purchase of the book :) .

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  Jankyn

  I don't recall that they specifically said that the Society was opposed to the ERA. What they did was include a lot of anti-feminist rhetoric in their usual drivel about a woman's "place," and use the ERA as an example of "extremist" views that were in opposition to Biblical principles.

  Jankyn
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  51

  M.E illness amongst jehovahs witnesses?

  by haujobbz in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  .

  i have always wondered why so many jws i knew suffered from the illness "m.e" previous to being a jw i never heard of this illness but when joining the borg i noticed noticed so many jws saying all of a sudden they had m.e maybe its a jw disease trend.

  anyhow what does m.e stand for.. haujobbz

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  Jankyn

  Don't forget fibromyalgia, which keeps one from meetings and field service quite nicely, thank you. Funny thing about that one is that it can only be diagnosed by process of elimination. If you DON'T have any other explanation for your aches, pains and lack of energy...and of course, it's often treated with anti-depressants as well.

  Lots of fibromyalgia in my mom's congregation. I suspect it may be contagious.

  Jankyn
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  4

  When Nazis Rule

  by metatron in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  someone once wrote.

  that despite all of their fanatical strength and initial success.

  the nazis were doomed from the beginning.

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  Jankyn

  Metatron, you have a real gift for cutting to the heart of the matter. Thanks.

  Jankyn
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  4

  Boys vs. Girls, Abuse Cases

  by FreeFallin in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i watched connie chung last nite with a non-witness friend.

  she suggested that the reason the abuse is covered up and brushed aside is because it largely involves girls who are molested.. i know the society is homophobic, so there would be very little male to male contact.

  since little girls can't grow up to be elders, and are second class citizens in the org, could this be a possibility?.

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  Jankyn

  Because of the entrenched homophobia in society, instances of abuse that involve boys typically are perceived as being more horrifying--and they get more attention. Even among the Catholics, some experts believe that 4 to 6 times as many girls have been abused as boys. This is not to minimize the trauma that boys endure--I'm only pointing out that the "homosexual" connotation associated with abuse of boys seems to trigger a homophobic reaction in most people. What this does do is minimize the severity of the trauma that female victims endure. There are several articles on the SNAP (Survivors Network for those Abused by Priests) websites that address this issue. Check out www.survivorsnetwork.org for more information.

  David Clohessey, founder of SNAP, has pointed out that we tend to hear more about boys being molested for three reasons. First, men tend to direct their anger outward (such as by filing lawsuits), while women tend to direct their inward (avoiding public attention). Second, women are more likely to deal with pain privately, by attending therapy sessions or support groups. Third, Clohessey notes that "male/male sex is more salacious and therefore attracts the attention of the Jerry Springers."

  Jankyn
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  21

  Abuse Myth

  by gravedancer in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  when you have the "who is the poster you like least competition" i know this post will enable you to choose gravedancer as a prime candidate but tfb here goes:.

  it would seem as if everyone here is convinced that the organization of jehovah's witnesses is rife with molestors and they are raping kids at every juncture and every chance they get.

  perhaps with the latest attention silentlambs has been getting this issue is just more prevalent but the reactions of some seem so stooped in personal bitterness that they are willing to just blindly accuse any jw of being a molestor (even when they know nothing else about that person other than the person is a jw).. true i agree 110% that the policy of the 2 witness rule needs to be changed immediately and victims should be encouraged to go to the police.

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  Jankyn

  When I first started hearing about child abuse among JWs on these boards, I thought, "Oh, it's like in our congregation--an isolated incident here and there, with really stupid elders." Because that's what I'd thought for more than 25 years--that what went on in our congregation was an aberration; that other congregations surely did not mistreat victims and harbor perpetrators. Because that's what my JW mother had told me: "These are imperfect men. We'll wait on Jehovah."

  So the shock of finding out that my experience seems to be the norm rather than an aberration has taken quite a bit to get over. I have not told my story to silentlambs or on this board, and have no intention of doing so until and unless the therapy I am pursing seems to indicate it is the appropriate thing to do for my own healing process. What I will say is that I bless Bill Bowen and all his supporters for the work they are doing, both to protect JW children from being victimized in the future, and to facilitate healing for those of us who have survived.

  And it is, in many ways, a relief to know that I am not alone.

  Best,

  Jankyn
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  93

  NEW YORK TIMES SUNDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  by silentlambs in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  we are going to have an extensive article in the new york times this sunday.

  there is an early addition that comes out in most cities around on saturday.

  i encourage one and all to get your copy and do not miss the important piece of history.

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  Jankyn

  My partner just ran out to try and find a NYT. Figures, the one Sunday that I decide the crossword isn't really worth five bucks...

  This is more ammo to use. I had some JWs doing streetwork outside my office on Thursday (mostly giving old copies of the WT and Awake to homeless people, who will then drop them up and down the street). When they asked if I'd like something to read, I said "Not unless you've changed your policy about sheltering child molesters." The older woman (obviously in charge of a couple of teen pioneers) said something to the effect of Dateline being onesided--and I pointed out that the BBC, the London Guardian, the Washington Post and our own Sac Bee had all reported the same thing--by which time they were backing away from the evil apostate. Now I can put the NYT at the top of the list.

  We've got the "paper of record" for the entire nation reporting on this. Good work, Bill, Barbara, and all those not-so-silent-anymore-lambs.

  Best,

  Jankyn
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  20

  What should I do?

  by siegswife in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this isn't jw related, but i was hoping to get some feedback on a problem that i'm having.. here's the deal.

  yesterday my downstairs neighbor told the maintenance man that she want to shoot us (my family).

  i've known for about 2 years that she has some mental problems and was somehow focused on us, but i didn't realize to what extent.. two years ago, around christmas, we came home from somewhere and saw 2 christmas cards laying on the rug outside our door.

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  Jankyn

  It's already been said, but here's my bit. I was a 911-dispatcher for nine years. Generally, schizophrenics are not dangerous HOWEVER, that said, they can get into quite a bit of trouble if they're off their meds, and there are exceptions--those who act on the delusions.

  So the advice to bring this to the attention of both your apt manager and the local police is very good advice. Tell them that you know there probably isn't much that they can do, but you'd like them to be aware of the situation in case it escalates.

  I am against buying a gun for a myriad of reasons, but the biggest one is that in my experience, people who are not proficient in firearms and try to use them in a life-threatening situation are more likely to (a) accidentally shoot themselves or a family member or (b) have the weapon taken from them and used against them. If you're willing to invest the time in the training it takes to become proficient, go right ahead--but also be aware that if you have a child in the house, you are taking a huge risk. Unless of course you lock the weapon up--in which case it will be difficult to reach in an emergency.

  Jankyn, wishing you the best