Wow that was very revealing and cathartic - I didn't realise just how long the list was before the tipping point was reached - ouch - and thank you for a great thread FHN.
I had also managed to forget that their was so much darkness and error I was aware of even prior to the lights coming on fully.
Very interesting and potentially useful concept for helping loved ones. I believe you are right about 100% (of JWs having such a hidden or secret list).