Posts by babygirl30

18

jws deny shunning, yet lie to not look bad

by Ghiagirl in

i recently decided to take matters into my own hands with my husbands family who have nothing to do with us.

his mom has seen my son twice since he has been born and his dad has never met him.

his family will pop in every few months, on top of that like in my last post ask for for money.

babygirl30

Im so sorry you are going through this, and believe me, I know all too well the pain of shunning. My parents shun me, and make NO attmepts to hide it in public, at family functions, etc. It was last summer at my family reunion that it all came out the LIES my father has been telling everyone as to why he and my mother do not acknowledge my existence!! That broke my heart...these 2 elderly adults vehemently deny that their shunning is religiously based, and instead say that it is ME and how I am pulling the wool over everyones eyes. Their ignoring me is not their choice but mine? That if people want to know why we dont speak, to ask ME?

The thing is, their delusion is so thin, that 99% of rational thinking human beings can see right through it - thankfully. And the lies they tell are ONLY believed by those in the org. Remember, thats what we were always taught...those the get DFd is because they werent repentant, not because 3 untrained men sealed their fate. And they will continue to point blame in your direction, as if their choice to shun was made by you. It is so sad and pathetic that they feel people are that dumb to believe it. Hugs to you and your husband. I would put s hault on any financial assistance to them...especially if they cannot even show respect enougj to you.

10

Three reasons why I may have to back.

by Crazyguy in

jw
friends

i look back over the last two years of my life with all the experiences i have read about here and other places and these are three experiences that stand out to me.

recently in another post a girl relates her experience of being in the borg and her mom literally threw her away by giving her over to the state after she accused an elder of groping her.

two; i met the man that wrote the insight books for the borg and even though he was at the time the brians of the borgs doctines when he faded his family , brother and his kids are shunning him.

babygirl30

Why do you feel YOU have to make such a sacrifice in order to 'help' your family? It doesnt seem as if they are making any compromises on your behalf...

25

NOW it's Important

by TheLiberator in

i have spent 45 years of my life sacrificing my soul to the watchtower.

twenty-five of those years as a ms/elder.

i gave every moment to them.

babygirl30

The eternal judgement is what I never understood...everyone ELSE can make a choice on how they want to act or what they want to do - but when YOU make choices, they all of a sudden have so much to say. It is forever frustrating and can make you think you are losing your mind...their 'circular' reasoning.

There was a sister in my cong when I was in who had married a non JW and was Df. She came back, retired, and became a pioneer. Now she would bring her husband around to diff JW parties and all, and he would come to a few mts here and there, but never did more then that. But she was who they used in demos and assemblies to speak against marrying outside the org and she would talk about how hard it was, how she was still trying to get him to come into the 'truth'...blah blah blah. Her husband ends up getting really sick, and I guess that pushes his spirituality into overdrive, cause he starts studying. He eventually gets baptized and they become this 'sooo happy' couple in the cong. So, there is a young pioneer sister who is dating a non-JW in the hall during this time (who is close to the older retired sis) and this older sis and her now baptized hubby have the nerve to TELL the elders about it together. Mind you, they did the same damn thing, but because their situation changed I guess they felt they had the right to speak up since their situation turned over and became RIGHT when the husband got baptized.

36

There seems to be many jw's marrying outside of org recently.

by atomant in

l was wondering if others have noticed this or is just my imagination?my sister whom has always been a fine example of a dub just got married to an outsider was a shock to everyone as no one knew she was dating an outsider.she seems happy.the elders are to shit scared of her to approach her about the matter.

babygirl30

A LOT of millenials are openly dating and marrying outside the org. I think it is about time!

60

I would rather be in the JW cult than the ex-jw cult

by questioningmyfaith in

jw
friends

i have posted one other time on this website.

just for the mere fact that i wasn't anger and bitter and ready to declare the gb the sociopathic criminals that so many here ascribe to, my initial question digressed to bickering over ad hominem attacks against the gb and not my beliefs that i'm questioning.

some did give me some help on my questions.

babygirl30

I've never fully understood peoples need to make an 'ANNOUNCEMENT' that they are leaving some type of group. I swear, everytime I see one of these posts on social media "this is my last fb post"...."Im closing my twitter accout"..."Im officially done with Snapchat" - blah blah blah. It is all a cry for attention, nothing more, and I just smh. Usually that person is seeking validation for their threat to leave, or they want people to try to convince them to stay. It's the difference in the person that constantly threatens to kill themselves at every turn vs the person that sadly does commit suicide. Ex: abusers will loudly threaten to leave and end their lives each time they dont get their way and/or wants attention. But most that do take their own lives, dont give advanced notice. They dont consciously draw unnecessary attention to themseves - thus why the act is so devastating.

As on any chat group/forum/social media site, people will openly express their opinion and then communication ensues. If I dont agree with things I see posted, guess what I do???

Wait for it....

It's a new concept, I know...

You ready for it?...

I read something else. I move on. Or I ignore it. Novel idea, I know. My point being, an official announcement is never necessary. Because in the end, that opens the door for all kinds of responses - which seems to be the very reason you are 'announcing' wanting to leave this forum. Although you make some valid points that I do agree with, overall, unless you are a CEO of a major company who is resigning, nobody needs a speech. 😁

39

JW marriages: “They” looked good on paper.

by Londo111 in

i applaud anyone, male or female, who overcomes shallowness and looks at a person’s deeper qualities, especially in regard dating and marriage.

the movie and fashion industry does much to institute shallowness to the point that, in my opinion, it promotes outright discrimination and judgmentalism even as they give lip service to tolerance..

on the other hand, among jehovah’s witnesses, there seem to be a preponderance of incompatible marriages.

babygirl30

Wow...does this bring back memories. I recall a JW family I was close to in MD that tried to hook me up with this divorced brother in his 40s...while I am 23! The story was that this man waited forever to get married, finally does, and she cheats/leaves him. So he was now looking and his beety eyes were set on ME. Now I have always been loud and speak my mind, so when my friend basically pushes us together to talk, I got irritated and grossed out at what this much older man would want with me?! In the end, it was obvious why this brother was cheated on - he was so weird. I almost believe he had Aspergers years before that was even well known. But my friends actually got OFFENDED that I had no interest in this man. As if???!!!

Another example is when I was about 16. There was this older man (40s) who used to come to the Khall from the sign language cong - and he was totally deaf. No one knew why he came to my cong as he had no translator and couldnt hear the speakers? Come to find out, this dumpy man was coming to talk to me. He told the brothers...correction...he WROTE the brothers that he was interested in me, and wanted to get their feelings on us being s match?! The elders told me and my parents, and then next meeting, this creeper writes in his tablet "I would like to date and get to know you better"?! I was so disgusted!!!!! I was in high school...come on. Igave him the stank face, smh, and wrote back "no thank you. Im still a kid."

Last story...I swear (cause I have a billion). Had met a bunch of brothers I became friends with, and we would all hang out. One of these brothers liked me and was very open about it. Mind you, I had my own apt, my own car, a good job, and was independent. HE was the same age, worked PT so he could be a reg pioneer, honestly...looked like a human version of Shrek, and lived at hime with hos parents and sisters. This guy was sweet but a damn mess! So when he asked me out and I told him no...he got MAD and offended that I refused. His response t me saying no was "...but you are 27 and not married. Isnt that what you want? I can give you that?" I remember LAUGHING out loud in his face (since my full blown IDGAF attitude was in effect in my 20s) and couldnt believe thr nerve of this guy. It really is no joke how JWs date and marry. It is so backwards!

23

JW Hypocrisy Rears It's Ugly Head...As Usual

by babygirl30 in

jw
friends

so about last night.... i am out at a local club (not restaurant, not event venue - a club) to see a rap concert.

now, i am with some friends minding my own business, and i find that i am standing right behind 3 active jw's - one of whom used to be my best friend.

this girl is as fake as they come: 1) she used to live with me and would bring non-jw guys home all the time, 2) was living with a man when she lived down south - until he dumped her, and then she decided to go back to jw's the 1st time and got reproved, and i supported her.

babygirl30

Matter a fact, she is wishy washy with the ''truth" over money...her family has money, takes lavish vacations every year, the kids got new cars when they graduated, etc. So whenever she is OUT in the streets, her parents cut her off. And Im sure she gets tired of struggling on her own, so she runs back. This cycle has now happened 3x. To me, that is pathetic

23

JW Hypocrisy Rears It's Ugly Head...As Usual

by babygirl30 in

jw
friends

so about last night.... i am out at a local club (not restaurant, not event venue - a club) to see a rap concert.

now, i am with some friends minding my own business, and i find that i am standing right behind 3 active jw's - one of whom used to be my best friend.

this girl is as fake as they come: 1) she used to live with me and would bring non-jw guys home all the time, 2) was living with a man when she lived down south - until he dumped her, and then she decided to go back to jw's the 1st time and got reproved, and i supported her.

babygirl30

Freddo - I wish I had taken pics. But I just didnt bother cause the way they literally RAN outta there had me dying...their guilt made me smile!

Beautiful Mind - you hit the nail right on the head. They always FORGET what was done for them...when you dont follow the gang mentality. It is the quintessential definition of fake! You are to them when its what they need, but suddenly become not good FOR them when you dont think how they think.

23

JW Hypocrisy Rears It's Ugly Head...As Usual

by babygirl30 in

jw
friends

so about last night.... i am out at a local club (not restaurant, not event venue - a club) to see a rap concert.

now, i am with some friends minding my own business, and i find that i am standing right behind 3 active jw's - one of whom used to be my best friend.

this girl is as fake as they come: 1) she used to live with me and would bring non-jw guys home all the time, 2) was living with a man when she lived down south - until he dumped her, and then she decided to go back to jw's the 1st time and got reproved, and i supported her.

babygirl30

Pete Zahut, your reply was beautiful!!! Had me rolling here...cause it was to the point but full of sarcasm - just my style! I know this chick is fake, and the fact that she even responded with that JW rhetoric means she knows she is guilty. No further convo or explanation would be required at this point...and like I said, I know for a fact she isnt dumb enough to TELL anyone JW she saw me...cause they def would ask where - hahahah. She would have to out herself, which she is way too chicken to do. It made me remember again why I have no desire to go back. This petty fakeness is a reminder of how oblivious JWs are to their own reflections. At least in the world I know exactly what Im dealing with...but the facade JWs wear is so thick even they can see through it.

23

JW Hypocrisy Rears It's Ugly Head...As Usual

by babygirl30 in

jw
friends

so about last night.... i am out at a local club (not restaurant, not event venue - a club) to see a rap concert.

now, i am with some friends minding my own business, and i find that i am standing right behind 3 active jw's - one of whom used to be my best friend.

this girl is as fake as they come: 1) she used to live with me and would bring non-jw guys home all the time, 2) was living with a man when she lived down south - until he dumped her, and then she decided to go back to jw's the 1st time and got reproved, and i supported her.

babygirl30

Agreed JRK...although I did it for years. But it was SO tiring and time consuming, and the older I've gotten the more I see it being so fake. It's not worth it to me to do again, thus why I won't go back.