Posts by 2pink

33

Learning the "Truth" Is not true is like...................

by foolsparadise in

jw
friends

after 33 years of being mind controlled at 5 meetings a week, field service meetings, special day assembly, curcuit assembly,district assembly, finding out "the truth" is just a big hoax is like getting punched in the stomach-uppercut in the jaw-being kicked in the balls from behind and then having the rug ripped out from under you and smashing your head on the ground.

what was it like for everyone else?.

2pink

i think my response is similar to ATJ's....i always had nagging doubts. when i finally explored them and came to a conclusion, i was mostly just sad.

and i still am.

15

Not just information to help people leave, but a community on the internet

by OnTheWayOut in

jw
friends

a recent thread asked if ray franz's book was instrumental in people's decision to leave wts.

many left before the book was out, many left on their own without the book, most read it afterward and it was instrumental in their never going back.

a bunch of people got their information about wts from the internet.

2pink

i've been having doubts for years, and only recently mustered up the courage to explore those doubts fully.

so, i've been all over the place online, but this place is saved as one of my "favorites". i love not only the hard, cold facts i can get here, but also the warm, welcoming atmosphere that prevails. my hours spent in reading the bible (not the NWT!) and spent reading on forums such as this one have only solidified my decision.

i'm honestly not sure how i'd have fared as one who was trying to leave the JWs back when there was no one else to talk to...:(

28

Newly fading and having morbid thoughts about dying....is that normal?!

by 2pink in

jw
friends

i have been having doubts for years about the org, but it's mostly been just the past couple of months that it's really all unravelled for me.

i'm at that stage now where i don't know what i believe about anything...esp about what happens when you die.. and maybe it's just cause i never had to think about death before (was always countin' on that resurrection in paradise earth!

), but lately i can't stop thinking about it!

2pink

i have been having doubts for years about the org, but it's mostly been just the past couple of months that it's really all unravelled for me. i'm at that stage now where i don't know what i believe about anything...esp about what happens when you die.

and maybe it's just cause i never had to think about death before (was always countin' on that resurrection in paradise earth!), but lately i can't stop thinking about it! part of me wonders if it is also because death and destruction are main highlights of the Thrill Kill Cult....are these thoughts stuck in my head bcs of that?!

has anyone else experienced this?? when does it stop?? i'm having terrible nightmares at night about it. i think i'm mostly all worked up bcs i have 2 little girls...and not having that "guarantee" that i'll see them again if something bad should happen to me/them is totally freaking me out.

i mean, people who were never JW don't walk around all day thinking that death could be around the next corner....they just live. how do i get to that stage?!

thanks for reading!

88

Layin' some heavy stuff on ya'

by AK - Jeff in

three days ago i became aware that my daughter was arrested.

again.. here's a little history.

we adopted this child when she was 2 months old.

2pink

i am truly saddened to read your story.

it sounds like you and your wife poured your heart and soul into this child, so i can't even imagine the sadness you must be feeling. as much as we wish it were not true, love really cannot fix everything. when we choose to become parents and to love someone so completely, it really leaves us pretty open and vulnerable because there are no guarantees how any child (or adult!) will turn out.

i admire you for stepping up for the grandkids and giving them the chance at a much better life than they would've likely had with their mom. i wish you well.

39

"My Book of Bible Stories" returned for being "too violent for kids." You Agree?

by Witness 007 in

obviously a book written for kids by old dumb morons at bethel the book starts with abels murder {with pictures for the kids} people begging to get into the ark before drowning to death...a good lesson for kiddies!

a women putting a tent peg thru someones temple {with pictures} moses killing an egyptian.

etc a horrified atheist lady returned the books my mother gave as "gifts" {count 2 placements} after seeing the horrific topics, she decided it was "not apropriate for her kids.".

2pink

i grew up a JW and the BSB was one of the only kid's books i remember having. i guess i thought it was normal, esp since they talked about that kind of stuff all the time at the meetings anyway. the one picture that did bother me a lot and still does is the flood scene.

i have 2 young daughters (ages 3 & 4) and even when i was a practicing JW, i did not let them look at that book. i actually don't even think we own one. it's disgusting if you ask me.

9

telling jw's your findings about the cult

by AwSnap in

i'm finding that if you ask a jw a question as though you are completely confused (its got to be "sincere", not aloof), dumb, pondering, unsure, unconfident (that's the biggie), they will listen to what you have to say.

if you ask things with even a *hint* of cocky attitude or a 'let me show you what you don't know' attitute, their minds will shut off instantly.

just speaking from experience.

2pink

i totally agree, but it's so hard to do!

or maybe that's just bcs i'm overzealous right now as i am experiencing my first taste of real freedom in 31 years...and i can't shut up about it. :)

61

If you pray, do you say 'Jehovah'...?

by wantstoleave in

just wondering of those that pray and who have left the organisation, do you still address god as jehovah?.

i think i'm currently in that awkward stage where i'm neither in or out, yet don't feel i should even address, or have the right, to talk to god (jehovah) until i decide where i sit.

so i'm wondering if it's hypocritical to pray and use his name.

2pink

i am also in the weird in between phase.

i'm still praying (quite hard) and am saying "god" or "heavenly father". i don't know why, but right now to say "jehovah" seems not quite right.

11

Pondering the Flood...

by 2pink in

this is only my second thread here on this forum, so forgive me if i put this on the wrong board.. i'm a jw on the way out....past few years and esp past few months of thinking have pretty much sealed the deal for me.

i'm done.. so anyway, as i allow myself to think more and more and question more and more of the bible, something i have always wondered about is the flood.

did god regret doing that, hence the rainbow promise??

2pink

this is only my second thread here on this forum, so forgive me if i put this on the wrong board.

i'm a JW on the way out....past few years and esp past few months of thinking have pretty much sealed the deal for me. i'm done.

so anyway, as i allow myself to think more and more and question more and more of the bible, something i have ALWAYS wondered about is the flood. did god regret doing that, hence the rainbow promise?? if he regretted doing that, then that would lead one to believe it was a mistake, which could lead one to think all sorts of things. however, if the rainbow promise wasn't bcs he felt any remorse, but for some other reason, then i would like to know what y'all think that reason is. i've never been able to reconcile that story in my own head.

thanks for reading!

42

On my way out of the "organization" and feeling very lost...

by 2pink in

jw
friends

firstly, thank god i found this forum!

i've spent the better part of today while my kids were in school reading many threads.. some background...i am in my mid 30s, married, 2 kids.

i was born and raised a jw...came from "good" stock...elders, pioneers, etc.

2pink

thank you so much for all the replies (and the bible recommendations)! really, you've made me feel much better.

so, it's normal to just walk around really confused for a while??? it feels very strange to go from being rock solid in faith in one thing to feeling utterly clueless.

i do like what bluecanary posted above "i'd rather have questions i can't answer than answers i can't question". SO true!

42

On my way out of the "organization" and feeling very lost...

by 2pink in

jw
friends

firstly, thank god i found this forum!

i've spent the better part of today while my kids were in school reading many threads.. some background...i am in my mid 30s, married, 2 kids.

i was born and raised a jw...came from "good" stock...elders, pioneers, etc.

2pink

firstly, thank god i found this forum! i've spent the better part of today while my kids were in school reading many threads.

some background...i am in my mid 30s, married, 2 kids. i was born and raised a JW...came from "good" stock...elders, pioneers, etc. even tried my own hand at pioneering for a year. aside from a few rebellious teenage years, i was a "good" witness who went to meetings, studied, commented...followed the prescribed merry go round of "works".

anyhoo...the past few years, i've started thinking...i know, i know, a very un-JW thing to do. when my oldest child was born, it was a very high risk pregnany/delivery and i remember them asking me during the delivery "so if the blood loss gets too much, even if you or your baby are about to die, you will not accept a blood transfusion for either of you?" and i said "no". thank god both of us survived, but it was shortly after that i began to question things bcs i just couldn't wrap my head around the fact that jehovah would want a new mom or a baby to die for any reason.

so that was 5 years ago, and once i start letting myself think, the doubts came often and heavy. i have done lots of reading and researching and now i have an issue with almost everything about the JWs and their teachings and "organization". so i won't even get into that as i'm sure most of you understand. my children are still quite young, so i am happy that i at least have got it figured out that i won't raise them JW and spare them that.

however, i think i have been so crippled by this religion's crushing control on me that i don't even know how to decide what's next. i don't even know what i believe anymore. i thought i was so well versed in the bible and knew god....well, i was well versed in the NWT and knew the JW god. so i feel like i'm starting at square one...where do i go?? i believe in god ad the bible. i would like to go to some sort of church...something non denominational that doesn't force a doctrine down my throat but that is uplifting and encouraging to visit. i would like to meet other christians. but like i said, i feel like an idiot...i don't even know where to start.

of course, it is totally freaking me out that i am going to lose most of my friends and my entire family who are all active JWs. when i go out, i'm going all the way out and will be doing the holidays/birthdays with my kids....so it's not gonna be a big secret. it's just sad to think that my entire social network will be gone in one day.

also i am worried about my husband. he has expressed many doubts over the years as i have and has missed many meetings/service/etc, but now that i am finally deciding to act on those doubts and get out, he is trying to get religious on me and now go to all the meetings...?!?! i know that we will each decide for ourselves what is truth and what isn't, but it worries me seeing him do this. he won't read anything online or in print that is anti-JW even if it's simply 3rd party facts that contradict what the society says. he will listen to me tell him what i read, but doesn't want anymore to do with it than that.

anyway, sorry this post is soooo all over the place, but i'm just so grateful to ahve found this forum. i would appreciate any thoughts/advice/support....whatever ya got! oh and can anyone recommend a good bible?? i want one that is a word for word translation, but that is also easy to read/follow in modern english.

thanks for reading.