anyway a very close friend whos a special pioneer was told by the elders he cant attend the wedding because she is marrying a non jw, hes in a cong in another town, yet her elders dont know shes marrying a non jw, can the elders tell someone they cant attend the wedding?
because he has told her hes been told he cant go? is there any scriptual grounds for that?
No, there aren't any scriptural grounds for it, only made up rules by men. Where is this wedding going to be at? If it is another church, then that is very frowned upon. If not, it could be one of those, "a matter of Bible trained conscience" issues (also known as more Watchtower rules, but not in print).