nugget

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Posts by nugget

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  188

  Rick Fearon should apologise for accusing faders of being cowards

  by cedars in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i hate doing this type of thread.

  none of us are perfect, least of all myself, and i would rather focus any criticism on the watch tower society for damaging people's lives.

  however, in the short period since i've been a member of this forum i've noticed one member in particular deteriorate in his behaviour into the type of individual who threatens to undermine the credibility of the entire website.

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  nugget

  Rick is mistaken to think that the only way to oppose the organisation is by going public and manning a banner. He is wrong to question the integrity of other posters who choose to remain annonymous but who still post articles and raise awareness of the damage of the organisation by other means.

  I speak from my own experience that the posts of these people were instrumental in making me question my beliefs and make the decision to leave the organisation behind. I don't need to know who Outlaw, Cedars and others are outside of this forum to value their opinions and ideas. Sometimes we become so wedded to the way that we approach a problem that we cannot see that there are other methods that are equally valid.

  The strength of the forum is the wide range of perspectives, and whilst I may not agree with everything presented by everyone I respect the right of people to post. There is no hierarchy or rule that states that those DA'd or DF'd for apostacy have greater authority than those who still remain in the organisation trying to fade. No one truly understands the issues of each individual and therefore is in no position to judge someone as less worthy than another.

  Rick finds it difficult to apologise but in this case admitting that he made a mistake is an act of humanity and strength not a sign of weakness. The organisation is extremely damaging and to continue to hurt one another when we are free of their control is criminal.
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  66

  Latest May 2012 Watchtower: "JW wives must be more lovable"

  by cedars in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  yes, the latest watchtower is upon us.

  it opens with a typically outlandish article on marriage.

  here are a few of the headlines:.

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  nugget

  This article is reinforcing the idea of subjection the wife needs to earn the right to be loved. Husbands are naturally predisposed to show fine qualities but it is the wife who determines whether she will receive love and protection. There is also the implication that if the wife is not loved then she is the one who has failed, if she had behaved appropriately the husband would not have had any difficulty expressing affection, but because she has not then the husbands natural instincts have been over ridden.

  The husband is thus absolved on all counts. If he doesn't love his wife it is not his fault it is hers. If he abuses her then again she drove him to it. The wife is left with no support and only the admonishment to be more loving since the solution to all her woes is in her hands. It saddens me that women are wasting their lives on abusive, selfish men, putting their lives and mental well being at risk because they think that this sort of nonsense comes from God and all will be well. Elders are not being equipped to deal with marital problems in a meaningful way and are in real danger of doing more harm than good.

  You are right that there is no balancing not even the thought of earning respect although these points are usually limited to providing for the family physically and spiritually. No wonder so many witness marriages are full of regret.
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  66

  Terrible conduct by congregation Elders in hospital room !

  by RULES & REGULATIONS in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  my uncle was rushed to the hospital last tuesday with severe stomach pain.

  (he was diagnosed with colon cancer one year ago.

  the doctors, family,and my uncle decided against colon surgery.

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  nugget

  At the end of it all the person who really counts in all of this is your Uncle and allowing him to pass from this life with dignity and in peace. Although what the elders did showed a lack of compassion and respect for the family, your cousin did the right thing not to make a huge fuss on this occasion. If your uncle took comfort from their presence and the prayer they offered then this is the most important thing at this time.

  In future I would take the initiative and request that people who are non family have to wait in the lounge for a member of the family to escort them to the room. This allows for any confrontations to be managed away from the room of the dying person and the family members to make it plain that the purpose of the elders is to comfort the one passing and not to use it as an occasion to punnish those who believe differently.

  If the elders feel that they cannot comply with this simple request then their visit should be declined and they should be escorted off of the ward with instructions that they are unwelcome if they return. After all when the people come back in the resurrection the elders will have ample time to instruct them regarding appropriate boundaries with Df'd ones.
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  27

  ITS MY FIRST BIRTHDAY!!!

  by TimothyT in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  its my first real birthday today!

  i recieved a call in the morning with a sweet voice singing 'happy birthday' to me.

  it was so nice.

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  nugget

  Happy Birthday have a super day.
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  24

  Elder's wives

  by Zordino in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i still go to meetings (sometimes) mostly to acompany my wife and kids.

  i have known of jw friends of mine that have gone to elder's for family problems, dispute's with other cult member's or those hemroid's that just won't clear up.

  whatever.... i personally never ever told an elder or elder's a stitch of info about my personal life or trouble's etc.

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  nugget

  It depends on the elder. My husband told me nothing and I knew nothing. I didn't even know when he was holding a Jc with other elders. Sometimes he looked pretty miserable about something but would go over to another elder who lived locally to discuss it. If he was called at home he went into another room and shut the door. He took confidentiality very seriously. No one ever tried to ply me for info because they soon realised I was clueless. I got all my info off other sisters whilst on service who all knew everything that was going on. I think because witnesses live such narrow lives they have to live vicariously through others.

  Like all things there are good wives and elders who respect the privacy of others and bad ones who don't.
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  66

  3/15 WT- " Forget the Good Times you had Prior to being JW - Can't .........

  by flipper in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  .......... trust your mind !

  " yes, they actually said this in a wt study article entitled, " do not look at the things behind " .

  i swear the wt society writers and leaders are getting even more controlling and manipulative !

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  nugget

  It has to be said that if you are happy in life you do not look back at the past wishing you had done things differently or feel regret. This nostalgia takes place when you are dissatisfied and unhappy.

  This article seems to be stating that witnesses in general are miserable with their lot and as such may have feelings of regret and dissatisfaction about the choices they made. They could have pointed out to their readers how much more satisfying their lives are now and fulfilling and that nothing the world offers can compare. The fact that they haven't is very telling since they are acknowledging that they have not made lives better just harder. Because they cannot hold up what they offer as a shinning light they are instead trashing past lives, ambitions and achievements and calling them garbage to make them appear worthless in comparison.

  Telling people living on the breadline, doing menial work because they sacrificed everything to the society to be happy that they haven't made the most of their opportunities is an insult. The society had the opportunity to influence people for the better and to encourage people to use their talents constructively and yet they squander their people daily. Happiness comes from inner contentment and cannot be commanded.
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  39

  My really long introduction...

  by Madge in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  okay, so i am new to the site, but i have been following ur threads for awhile now, and i am finding great comfort in them!

  no, i am not a witness and i have never been, and never will be!

  i did however, date a witness for about three years.. it was our typical 357th biweekly 'man hating' girls night out, and meeting mr. right was the last thing on my mind!

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  nugget

  Welcome to the board. I feel so sorry for your both and I am glad you have your priorities straight. Your boyfriend is trapped in a cult and his thinking and behaviours will be moulded by his cult experience. All the time he feels any loyalty to them the relationship will be painful and difficult. What happened with his mother shows that this is not a benign religion.
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  84

  Does bethel monitor this site?

  by 2tone in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i dont want to stir up conspiracy theories.

  is there any strong evidence out there that would suggest that bethel monitors this site?.

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  nugget

  I can confirm that my husband and I were presented with our posts on this site and facebook as evidence of our appostacy and I was asked directly whether I was Nugget. Whether this was Bethel or some zealous JW friend of a friend I don't know. What it does show is how careful faders need to be about how much personal information they share and with whom. Certainly your secret identity alone is no protection if you share that information with others. This is a public forum as is facebook and if the hack your account they have done nothing illegal.

  I also think that people who had any degree of prominence in the congregation need to be particularly careful since elders going off the radar are more likely to be followed up and asked to confirm that they believe the GB are gods reps on Earth.

  I certainly had a cyber stalker for a while it was exciting to think I was that special. I hope they took the time to read the posts here it would be an education.
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  48

  Dealing with elders during my mom's surgery

  by noni1974 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  my mother has been working forwell over a year to have a gastric bypass and she finally got the ok from her doctor and insurance.

  the date is set for this coming friday.

  although, i'm not 100% sure this will happen because she was diagnosed with pneumonia and a partially collapsed lung this past week.

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  nugget

  It is a shame that you have this added stress at a time like this. But ultimately your mother wants you to be there and that is the bottom line. If an elder were to suggest that your pressence is unwelcome then I would suggest to him that since your mother's wishes regarding blood have been communicated to the medical personnel then there is little reason for him to hang around, should things change you will arrange for him to be contacted.

  Hospitals are not appropriate places for people to bully others whatever pseudo religious title they claim to possess.
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  134

  WTF? Steven Untank's money accounts suddenly closed!!

  by mind blown in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  this is weird?!

  i just came accross this on mr unthank's personal site: http://stevenunthank.wordpress.com/monies/i recently read something where the wts is, let's just say connected, to various institutions/companies to wield/get their way.....is this one or just coincidence?

  moniespersonal message from steven unthank.

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  nugget

  Paypal are arrogant and inflexible. They will never admit to wrongdoing and will not communicate with anyone. Most of the emails sent are automatically generated and trying to work a way through the system is a nightmare. For it to have affected the bank account seems to indicate some complaint of fraud since paypal has no authority over standard accounts. It is likely that if such a complaint has been made that the parties involved will not discuss it with the person affected. It may be that the watchtower are using dirty tricks, their past behaviour has been less than honourable. If they truly felt they were justified there would be no need to try and railroad the prosecution.

  soft+gentle court cases are expensive and Mr Uthank has used a lot of his own time and resources. People who have donated did so understanding the facts it is unlikely that they have asked for a refund. He is using the money for the purpose for which it was intended unlike the watchtower who is very disingenuous about how they use donations they receive and ask for money to cover assembly expenses that have already been covered.