Df'ing is not about death it is about silence. It is a convenient label that means that you are dangerous to the organisation and that association with you may encourage others to question their faith. By giving you a convenient label they effectively build a symbolic wall around you that prevents you being seen and heard and they use it as a tactic to bully you into submission.
Posts by nugget
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13What does Disfellowshiping really mean?
by nolongerconfused innot sure if i spelled the word right, but:.
as some of you probably know i'm no longer active and have stopped attending etc...etc.... if one is disfellowshipped for whatever reason, including not agreeing with wtb doctrine...does the wtbs consider you worthy of death come armageddon?
i saw the trial transcript and that's what they believed in the 50's...anyone have any recent quote from their publications explaining how they see a disfellowshipped person?.
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25
Why should this annoy me?
by punkofnice inlong story short.
i left the wbt$ and was forcibly da'd for attending a church.. wifey says she 'chooses' not to talk to me about 'spiritual'(tm) matters.
i told wifey that she didn't 'choose' but was told not to talk to me about such matters by some men in brooklyn.
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nugget
It annoys you because you are a human being with feelings that can be hurt. We know that JWs are capable of mean spirited actions but it still hurts when they do this to us. It hurts more because it is unjustified and slanderous.
As you move further away from them what they think will mean less to you.
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40
What's you BIGGEST pet peeve/disagreement with the WT or GB?!?
by TeenageInsider infor me its the district conventions.
not bragging in anyway, but i was born-into a family of 'higher ups' im talking co's and zo's..... and there is a room that they set up in the conventions/stadiums called the "chairmans office".
i always have access to these rooms, because im usually with one of my higher up family members who give talks and all that other crap.. anyways, while everyone in the convention is sitting in the sun, eating a slimy, soggy bolognia sandwich, the chairmans office is air conditioned, has a variety of chilled beverages, 'coke, pepsi, diet coke, gatorade, dasani water bottles,' not to mention the 'danishes, sandwich triangles, cookies, cakes, muffins, fresh coffee, and for lunch, pizza, salads, pastas, and lasagna'.
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nugget
Now I'm Df'd they want to know when I'm dead. As if it is any of their business they didn't give a rat's arse about my health and well being when I was a member.
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42
NOAHS BIBLICAL FLOOD ACTUALLY HAPPENED, SAYS FAMED ARCHEOLOGIST WHO FOUND THE TITANIC
by ÁrbolesdeArabia inhttp://www.theblaze.com/stories/2012/12/11/noahs-biblical-flood-actually-happened-says-famed-archeologist-who-found-the-titanic/ .
"the story of noah's ark and its associated flood continues to be retold to children and studied by theologians, alike.
while some dismiss it as a mere fable, others believe wholeheartedly that the event literally unfolded, with a massive down-pouring of water ravaging the earth at god's command.
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nugget
The idea of a flood in the area of the black sea is not new. There is evidence that the black sea was once a fresh water lake with civilizations on it's shores. When the ice melted and the Mediterranean sea rose salt water flooded into the region of the lake turning the water into salt water. The fresh water crustaceans died and the water level rose creating the Black Sea. There is evidence of fresh water crustaceans all dying out simultaneously in the Black Sea.
There is the idea that a farmer built a raft or boat to save his animals from the rising water. Not 2 of every species in the world.
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31
My Jw mother hates me and always has
by 20yearfader ini just need to vent,you see i was a born in.it's taken me 20 years after fading from the org to finally get my mind free from the wt dogma.i was on the phone with my aunt today and the subject of my mother her older sister came up.now mind you i haven't spoken to my mother in a month or so after my daughter stayed the weekend at her house and she was being tag teamed about the hall and how i took a vow to jehovah and i'm a failure and i'll be destroyed at armagedon.this exchange upset my daughter so much that she was near the point of tears when she returned home and she hasnt spoken to my mother or father since.anyway back to the conversation with my aunt,she let it slip that my mother told her that she wished she had let the seamen that fertilized the egg that produced me had slid down her legnno bear in mind i can remember as a child running into her room playing and she would say to me as a 7 year old child "i wished i had left you in oblivion"this is one of many such saying my mother had for me......i wasn't a bad child i just wasn't allowed to do anything such as going outside going over a friends house....etc,i have struggled for years as to why this woman hates me so.i got baptized at 15 really as a way of pleasing them what the hell does a child know at 15??
?granted it took me some time to get myself together and put those hurtful comments in the past,but today when my aunt let it slip about what my mother has said about me it was like pulling a scap off of a wound.my wife always complains about how im emotionless and distance,this was done by me as a way of protecting myself.so i've decided and i hate to say this that my christian god fearing parents...are dead to me there is no way i can have a relationship with people that are so wicked and since she never wanted me anyway....it works out for the best thx i just needed to vent i felt like i was going to pop..
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nugget
My mother has happily told most of us that we were accidents, she never wanted any of us after the first one and has always had a relationship on her terms. One of my sisters went to a therapist and they told her that she is not a bad person because she does not love our mum. Love is not a right and parents can not treat children badly and expect to be loved in return.
I feel for you and your daughter.
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51
As a JW, how did you feel about shunning?
by jwfacts ini am interested in the answers for a new poll.
also, feel free to suggest other options, wording etc.agreed in full with the watchtower guidelinesagreed with shunning in general, but not for familywas stumbled by this practice but shunned as instructeddid not agree with the practice and secretly associated with disfellowshipped people .
for me personally, i did not agree with the practice and secretly associated with disfellowshipped people, even whilst at bethel.
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nugget
Shunning is a tough one siince my exposure to DF'd people was limited. I remember saying hello to someone who was DF'd when I saw them in the street and then felt guilty for years afterwards.
I also remember sitting next to df'd people at the hall and trying to be friendly and sharing books with them since they were making an effort and it seemed churlish to be mean to them when they were trying so hard. We once saw a df'd person who had run out of petrol and took him to the petrol station and back so he could fill up his car. It never occurred to us to leave him stranded.
I also know that if any member of my family had been df'd I would never have rejected them. In my mind df'ing was a loving discipline to bring someone to their senses not an act of rejection and I therefore lacked the essential coldness that is required to treat someone who is alive as if they are dead. However I was in a cult who knows how the constant drip feeding of poison would have affected me in the long term.
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26
Birthdays & Christmas
by Rattigan350 inwhat is the deal with people criticizing jws because they don't celebrate birthdays or christmas?.
it is as if when someone is born, from a baby, to a child, teen, adult; that one has a responsiblity to celebrate christmas (and i thought it was a free country); and others have a responsiblity to celebrate others' anniversary of one's birth.. i don't get the criticisms as if celebrating either is a great thing and the not celebrating is a bad thing.. data on star trek said that he does not understand why people celebrate their birthdays - a day one can not possibly remember.. what are you actually celebrating?
the fact that you made it another year?
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nugget
Celebrating anything should be a choice. I choose to celebrate because I think life needs joy. I also saw how not celebrating served to isolate my children from their peers. Birthdays and christmas does not have to be onerous or all about lots of presents it is about telling someone else that they are important to you and that you are glad they are in your life.
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48
Should i go?
by MsGrowingGirl20 inso, a good friend of mine, a pentecostal christian, invited me to go to a retreat with her church.
we're the same age-19 years.
we were friends before i became a witness and she was always patient and caring with me especially throughout my arrogant spell as a witness.
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nugget
Personally I wouldn't but you must do what you think is right. It is very hard when you are in a retreat to back off and decline any other approaches. Also if you have come out of a high control group you need time to regroup your thoughts before exploring other religions.
Love bombing and pressure occurs in a lot of religions and whilst you are still vulnerable I would politely decline. It gives you time to look at the religion critically before putting yourself in a high pressure situation.
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35
My Fathers Memorial Service
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nugget
The memorial service is not about your father. If you are lucky it will be given by an elder who knew him well and is willing to talk about him as a person. However the memorial service is just an excuse for them to preach their religion and the person is very much overlooked. The time is deliberately short to prevent the elder straying from the approved text.
If you wish to celebrate your father's life then do so but this cannot be achieved by a JW service.
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20
Just had a shep visit
by Captain Obvious inthey just left.
we had a nice "encouraging" chat about my inactivity.
they went through the usual guilt routine, that didnt seem to work so they turned to fear.
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nugget
at least you didn't get the instant death questions such as; "Do you believe the GB is god's representative on Earth?"