Cagefighter

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Posts by Cagefighter

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  15

  Congregation By Laws?

  by tootired2care in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  perhaps this was already discussed in another thread, if so i apologize in advance; but i was visiting some family several months back and we get into a conversation about their local congregation.

  one of my family members helps with some of the book keeping in that congregation.

  after a while he started talking about how the elders received some wierd letter from the society stating something to the effect that the congregation must put together or enforcing something for "corporate by laws" or "congregation by laws" - i'm not sure which.

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  Cagefighter

  So.... what would keep a congo from changing those bylaws and voting in something different?
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  19

  Getting some more help

  by Cagefighter in

  1. watchtower
  2. child-abuse

  i have talked before about what happened to me as a jw.

  i was baptized at 12 and two years later i was in a judicial committee for sexual immorality after having an inappropriate relationship with an older woman.. it was handled just like any other kh would have handled it.

  after a humiliating interrogation by my elder father in front of my mother, he dropped the dime on me.

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  Cagefighter

  Thanks yall. I appreciate the encouragment. It's scary how long ago it was, and as I get my self straightened out... well it's the core of it all. I guess I needed perspective. Even with out my experience. If I had a 14 yearold son living with his Mom and stepdad and found out all this happened I would certainly consider it abuse.

  Over the last few years my parents have opened up more about their childhood. They were converts in their 20's just a young couple. The both came from unstable homes where the booze flowed and chaos ensued. They felt abandoned themselves and like many kids that were abandoned emotionally and physically they tend to do it themselves when they get older. It is all they know. With out any help they don't even realize they do it.

  It's a cycle, that trickles down from one generation to the next. At least I can stop it one way or another with me.
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  15

  Congregation By Laws?

  by tootired2care in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  perhaps this was already discussed in another thread, if so i apologize in advance; but i was visiting some family several months back and we get into a conversation about their local congregation.

  one of my family members helps with some of the book keeping in that congregation.

  after a while he started talking about how the elders received some wierd letter from the society stating something to the effect that the congregation must put together or enforcing something for "corporate by laws" or "congregation by laws" - i'm not sure which.

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  Cagefighter

  I agree with baltar447.

  I would imagine they are trying to establish a protcol for handling certain situations to shield the individual congos from suit in the future. Probably requiring appointment of person to review any allegations of a "certain nature". If suit was ever brought against the WTBS in the future they could simply point to the congo and see if they followed the correct protocol if not they would make in the individuals liable.

  Imagine the CEO telling his managers to submit a written plan for logging and reporting sexual harassment complaints. That was the CEO and shareholders could point back to a rogue manager if he failed to follow the written plan making himself personally liable if it was not hanled properly.

  What else would you expect from a religion started by a lawyer?

  Also, the move could be to incorporate all congos as their own corps as well. The society could raise their hands and say, "hey we just sell 'em their books and host their conventions we don't get in the day to day operations".
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  19

  Getting some more help

  by Cagefighter in

  1. watchtower
  2. child-abuse

  i have talked before about what happened to me as a jw.

  i was baptized at 12 and two years later i was in a judicial committee for sexual immorality after having an inappropriate relationship with an older woman.. it was handled just like any other kh would have handled it.

  after a humiliating interrogation by my elder father in front of my mother, he dropped the dime on me.

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  Cagefighter

  Thanks for the feedback and encouragement. My story really shows me what a cult this really is. It would be easy to think my parents are just cruddy people, but they aren't. In some ways that has made all of this more difficult. They are good, honest, decent people. The power of a cult can overide even the most basic parental instincts.

  Think about Jonestown, the Branch Dividians, or even the guards that ran holocaust camps in Nazi Germany. Were those ALL bad people, evil to the core? No way, they bought into to something and identified with it so strongly that they found it easy to disconnect from their humanity.
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  19

  Getting some more help

  by Cagefighter in

  1. watchtower
  2. child-abuse

  i have talked before about what happened to me as a jw.

  i was baptized at 12 and two years later i was in a judicial committee for sexual immorality after having an inappropriate relationship with an older woman.. it was handled just like any other kh would have handled it.

  after a humiliating interrogation by my elder father in front of my mother, he dropped the dime on me.

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  Cagefighter

  I have talked before about what happened to me as a JW. I was baptized at 12 and two years later I was in a Judicial committee for sexual immorality after having an inappropriate relationship with an older woman.

  It was handled just like any other KH would have handled it. After a humiliating interrogation by my elder father in front of my mother, he dropped the dime on me. Another Elder came over that night and asked a few questions. He seemed very uncomfortable being there. We were new to the area and still having trouble "fitting in". The other elder read a few scriptures to me and got the hell out of there.

  The next few days were the worst of my life and I considered suicide many times. I paid no attention in class, did not talk to friends, certainly could not discuss it with my JW friends or wordly family. I had no one to turn to. My parent's would barely make eye contact with me or eat dinner with me. I hid in my room which I was never allowed to do previously.

  About two weeks later I had a JC. I guess my Dad had cooled off by then and was ready to go to bat for his son. We met at the hall and I had to answer questions, the usual JC crap. Where was your hands, where were hers? How many times.... blah blah blah.....

  Afterwards, I was told to wait outside, while my Dad went in and I assume went to bat for me.

  About half an hour later they called me back in to let me know I would be publicly reproved. One of the elder's seemed compassionate and concerned for me. The other was pissed avoiding eye contact, and the other just indifferent. The hall was known for being very spiritually strong yet a bit cliquish and unfriendly. We soon transfered back to another hall that we had first attended when we moved in. Basically, I got a public reproof if my Dad agreed to walk away and go back to the other hall from what I can tell as an adult.

  My father and I have never spoke of it since. I have ranted angrily about it to my Mom but not in more than a decade. I just burried it and grew out of my most self destructive behaviors on my own.

  I have made so many mistakes since then with my life and relationships. It has been like peeling an onion and I have finally gotten to the bottom of it. My life and relationship with my self was pretty healthy (considering I was in a cult) until that day. I was a 100% believer as child and after the JC all I wanted to do was get away from family and the org out of shame as fast as possible and I did.

  As an adult, old enough to have children myself and being in a position at times where younger and more vulnerable people trust me it is apparent this was abuse. The innappropiate relationship was one thing, but the crucification of my sense of identify and self worth was completely obscene and perverse. I have a decent relationship with my parents and they will never see their part in all of this, I must accept it.

  After a year of therapy and working on my most obvious flaws as an adult, I took a break feeling like I made good progress. I am now aware of my quirks and self destructive habits. However, something strange started happening lately. When I feel those negative feelings I talk myself out of doing something dumb like getting drunk, high, or seeking out an unhealthy relationship. It is not always easy. I have become a little disturbed wondering when will these feelings of being "unworthy" ever go away. When will I ever feel normal? Why is it so easy to see now how my life is just a cliche and predicatable for someone that was abused. I used to think I was real bad-ass or unique. Now I realize I am not any different than any other abuse victim.

  I decided to go back into therapy for another year and work on the core of this issue. Not forgiving or healing from the past, the JC and all but dealing with the core of the issue. How my sense of self and identity changed when I was only 14.

  To complicate this some don't understand how this is any form of abuse to begin with. Since I was male and was willing to get involved with this woman it must not be a bad thing, they say. I bought in to that for a long time until I remembered a few things. I only began fooling around with her because I was not allowed to date or express my feelings to any girls my age. The other thing is I remembered that she called me a couple of months after this was all over. She reached out to me after it was exposed. That is the pattern of a creep on her part. I realize I was more of a victim than I thought I was for so long.

  I know what happened to me is not as bad as being raped or suffering incest. I acknowledge that, but the way the JC and my family hung the guilt and shame on me scarred me to my core. Sometimes it is easy to bury these things for the sake of moving on. Sometimes it is necessary to dig them up for the same reason.

  If your thinking about getting help. There are some wonderfully talented people out there. They don't have to understand the JWs to help. Thanks for reading, don't give up no matter how complicated it seems.

  -CF
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  32

  How to Shit in the Woods

  by Wonderment in

  1. social
  2. humour

  "how to shit in the woods" ... this is actually a book title sold by the thousands, no, by the millions.

  yep, over 2.5 million copies of the book have been sold, and the author is a woman (kathleen meyer).. now, if you are a man, do you feel comfortable with a woman telling you "how to shit in the woods"?

  this book is in its third edition, in 8 languages to boot.

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  Cagefighter

  You must have your politics right. Whenever I start a thread like this someone get's it deleted.
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  3

  Suspicious package prompts bomb squad visit to East Peoria church

  by Gayle in

  1. watchtower
  2. child-abuse

  http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/48733387/ns/local_news-peoria_il/.

  ???

  not a bomb,,but still under investigation,,what was in the manila envelope?

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  Cagefighter

  My guess it was a 8 x 10 glossy of Sparlock and Papa Smurf engaged in "brazen conduct". Sister Pioneer opened it and had a fainting spell leading Brother Window-washer who showed up to conduct the FS meeting to suspect she had been poisoned!
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  7

  WAIT! Sparlock really happened?

  by Cagefighter in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i was cruising you tube and saw some cheezy cartoon about throwing a wizard toy in the trash.

  this is real?

  i thought yall were just being satirical.. the org has "jumped the shark" with this in my opinion.. the second they start reaching out to the children and youth on their level is a sign of desperation.. wow.. i hope the sequel involves little jimmy finds mommie's "neck massager" and throws it away for her.

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  Cagefighter

  So I actually gave up 15 minutes of my life to watch the video. Observations.

  1. The old dude from the GB drones on for a whole 2 minutes at the beginning! This is a twelve minute cartoon that is 20% of the time. The GB always staying in the background. I never even saw a pic of them as a kid and heard little about them until the Proclaimers book. There was a pic of them on one of the pages. I was shocked.

  2. The kid has no friends. He is obviously lonely and has to play my himself. The only exposure he get's to other kids is at school. The org still doesn't understand how this isolation is hurting not helping their numbers.

  3. I did not hear the word God once in the whole video. I hear Jehovah, Satan alot. It makes them feel like rival lovers battling for a kids allegiance. What a f-cked up cult.

  Even when they try to give a crap about the kids they fail miserably.
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  32

  JWs And Near Death Experiences

  by Cold Steel in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

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  Cagefighter

  Wow, great story Moshe.
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  10

  Why I know that the world is flat

  by stuckinamovement in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  why i know the world is flat.

  by iamani diot.

  the world is flat.

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  Cagefighter

  Apostate Propoganda! We (JW's) always knew the world was wrong. It says so in JOB!

  Remember that one? They are so cutting edge when it comes to science!