been lurking off and on for about a year.
i was never df'd or da'd, just walked away.. .
i began to study when i was a new mom.all my friends worked, i got lonely for adult conversation,and when i was offered a "free" bible study i jumped at the chance.
*wiping tears away from my eyes*
Welcome, Jadedlady. Glad you found this place and hope you can heal nicely.
The lack of love is what really stands out, imho, about the JWs.
Just make sure you give yourself time to heal/deprogram from a mind control group.
Joy
hello forum,.
i am amazed at this forums respose to my "never have been a jw" girlfriend, juanita.
through her persistance and the kindness of her heart she led me here.
Welcome, Eeeeellllmer, J. Fffffuuuudd. aka JJJohny
Hugs,
Joy
you know i like to post these dumb'uns but i was thinking this tonight as i sat here thinking what to post.
then i thought to myself, why am i sitting here "wondering" what to post on a forum like this.
i think i get more than the fair share of stick here for posts i have made because of what i do post, and i can live with that.
Your present status will always be ex-jw.
Only in your mind, Minimus.
you know i like to post these dumb'uns but i was thinking this tonight as i sat here thinking what to post.
then i thought to myself, why am i sitting here "wondering" what to post on a forum like this.
i think i get more than the fair share of stick here for posts i have made because of what i do post, and i can live with that.
Minimus,
I don't believe it is denial when someone moves on from their JW past. I don't hear people who used to be catholic saying they are exCatholics. I may state that I was raised a JW, but I WILL NOT refer to myself as staying in a xjw state.
Joy
you know i like to post these dumb'uns but i was thinking this tonight as i sat here thinking what to post.
then i thought to myself, why am i sitting here "wondering" what to post on a forum like this.
i think i get more than the fair share of stick here for posts i have made because of what i do post, and i can live with that.
we'll ALWAYS be xdubs
I disagree. We will remain xdubs only if we want to.
That part of my history is just that, history. I don't refer to myself as an xschoolgirl, xteen, x etc. you get the picture. The definition of yourself is what you are now.
Joy of the "came here for therapy while leaving the Dubs" class.
my wife is a jw.. i've been trying to point out the errors of the wtbts but she just doesnt want to hear it.. i'm wonder if some people could share your turning point in regards to your relationship goes.
with the society.
what made you realize that the society was false.
Welcome to JWD, Kevin.
We are all here trying to figure out ways to reach our loved ones/relatives.
Steve Hassen's first book on "Mind control" is good because it doesn't mention JWs but shows the same tactics they use.
Your wife is being taught that no matter what be loyal to God's organization?.
Read other's experiences here and how the lack of love finally made them look at their organization. Or Raymond Franz's books, Crisis of Conscience or In Search of Christian Freedom.
The UN scandal that was exposed here on JWD. (The WTBTS was an UGO 1992-2002) And how the WTBTs lies to cover themselves.
All you can truly do to help your wife is show her unconditional love. The JWs don't. You have to abide by their guidelines to recieve their love.
Good luck. Sorry there is no magic answer, but we are here to listen and sympatize. (been there, done that)
Joy
yup one more of my recovery threads.. for the last few years i have had a copy of a book sitting on my shelf called addicted to misery: the other side of co-dependency by robert becker.
early on in the recovery movement a co-dependent person was a term used mostly for people who were in a relationship with an alcoholic.
more recently it has been recognized that so-dependency can refer to any kind of addcion to substances or behaviors.
wow, powerful thread, Lee.
Thank you so much for posting information like this. More beneficial than you know.
Joy
.
i fianlly have a copy and i'm going to stat reading it tonite.i'm excited and i need this knowledge from an insider..
or donate copies of CoC and ISOCF to your local library
my wife is really starting to transition out of the wts.
this has been a happy time in both of our lives.. while things have peaceful at home - her somewhat abrupt departure appears to have raised eyebrows with her 2 jw syblings.
so much so that they are starting to plant their own seeds of doubt into her head.
Please, family_man, go invest in Crisis of Conscience and In Search of Christian Freedom by Raymond Franz. It is a start on how to debunk the JW thinking. Let your wife read those books, too. From there you just continue searching and reading what interests you. Ray does a good job of debunking JW doctrine.
Keep your guard up. The JW family members will always be hounding your family. That's how they are programmed.
Joy
allo folks.... .
please tell me if you think a jehovah's witness could read crisis of concience and continue to be a jw after finishing it?
since i have heard vague stories that there are some who have continued to be a jw, please relate the story and how you think this could be.
I agree with simplesally. "by putting their head back in the sand".
I gave CoC to my brother (who was at bethel the same time I was in the 70's), he claimed he read it, but I know he just skimmed it. All he wanted to know was what happened to Ray. That was over 3 years ago. He still goes to meetings (talk about a drone). His wife is more upset about the abuse issue because she used to be Catholic and hates how the WTBTS down grades them while they are allowing sexual preditors in the congregation.
But go figure. As soon as I read CoC, while an active witness, I wanted to "quite touching the unclean thing". But hubby convinced me to try the fade thing so that we could get through to our family before we were kicked out.
Everyone has to do what is best for them and their situation but I still scratch my head over any JW reading CoC and still being loyal to an organization. A publishing organization.
Joy
