Does anyone remember the faxes Kent Steinhaug used to send to the GB? They were absolutely hysterical. Such disrespect!
jukief
JoinedPosts by jukief
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15
A Letter from the GB to the folks of JWD...
by SYN inwatchtower(c) society of pensylvannia, inc. don't f*ck with us.
dear brothers and brotherettes,.
recently, we have heard from some of our brothers who aren't in such good standing that ya'll have been saying some pretty nasty things about us on your little web-pagelet.
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11
The Bible according to Spike Milligan.....
by Gadget in.
in the beginning god created the heavens and the earth.. 2. and darkness was upon the face of the deep; this was due to a malfunction at the lots road power station.. 3. and god said, let there be light; and there was light, but eastern electricity board said he would have to wait until thursday to be connected.. 4. and god saw the light and it was good; he saw the quarterly bill and it was not good.. 5. and god called the light day, and the darkness he called night, and so passed his gcse.. 6. and god said, let there be a firmament and god called the firmament heaven, freephone 999.. 7. and god said, let the waters be gathered together unto one place, and let the dry land appear, and in london it went on sale at six hundred pounds a square foot.. 8. and god said, let the earth bring forth grass, and the earth brought forth grass and the rastafarians smoked it.. 9. and god said, let there be lights in heaven to give light to the earth, and it was so, except over england where there was heavy cloud and snow over high ground.. 10. and god said, let the seas bring forth that that hath life, flooding the market with fish fingers, fishburgers and grade-three salmon.. 11. and god blessed them, saying, be fruitful, multiply, and fill the sea, and let fowl multiply on earth where prince charles and prince philip would shoot them.. 12. and god said, let the earth bring forth cattle and creeping things, and there came cows, and the bbc board of governors.. 13. and god said, let us make man in our own image, but woe many came out like spitting image.. 14. and he said, let man have dominion over fish, fowl, cattle and every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.. 15. and god said, behold, i have given you the first of the free yielding seed, to you this shall be meat, but to the ec it will be a beef mountain.
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jukief
I just finished reading that book. I haven't laughed out loud that much--ever.
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45
What do you do with your old liturature?
by Gadget in.
i'm in the middle of decorating my new house, and was a bit stuck as to what to use to mask off the furniture/carpets etc until i spotted an oldv pile of watchtowers that i'd been meaning to throw out.
i now have paint spattered watchtowers all over my living room.. anybody else got any good things to use old liturature for?
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jukief
I got rid of all mine. Then I met Alan.
Now my house is FULL of Alan's continually growing collection. The only way I can deal with it is by telling myself, over and over again, that it represents our retirement fund. Seriously.
I beg of you folks, do NOT offer Alan any of your old literature, no matter how much he begs or how much he offers to pay for it. PLEASE!
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81
Bowling for Columbine
by drwtsn32 ini just watched this documentary tonight and enjoyed it.
it's amazing to me the number of gun-related murders in the us... over 11,000 in one year.
i don't remember the exact figure, but canada, japan, and germany combined had less than 500 gun-related murders.
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jukief
Whether or not Michael Moore plays fast and loose with the facts, I think the fact that the movie calls attention to the gun crime in this country makes it worthwhile to watch. This is a scary place to live. So many guns in the hands of so many complete idiots. When we lived in Switzerland, all the men of army age had rifles and ammunition in their homes. They had to keep them there, where they were periodicaly inspected, because they were members of the standing army. Do you know how many crimes have been committed with those guns? None! I felt safe living in Europe; I don't feel safe here, not even in a city with a low crime rate, like Fort Collins, Colorado (an hour away from Littleton, BTW). Why do Americans have such a love affair with guns? Why do people need to own assult guns? For hunting? Give me a break. We need some decent gun control laws. Watch an hour or two of the trauma shows on TLC and you'll the results of our love affair with guns.
Moore made some excellent points in the movie, as well as in his books. I certainly don't agree with everything he says or with all his tactics, but that doesn't make everything he says untrue. If you're going to attack people for futzing around with the "facts," look first to our biggest and best example--good old Dubya.
As for Charleton Heston, when he assumed the role of president of the NRA, he put himself in a position to be criticized. Seeing that clip of him holding a gun above his head and saying "Over my cold, dead body" makes me nauseated. If he's senile, he should step down. In the meantime, he's put himself in the bull's eye (pun intended).
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MY CONSULTING TRIP TO BETHEL (starting over) PART 6
by seven006 inwithin a few weeks i leased a condo on the banks of the willamette river just out side the city of portland.
as she got into her car she looked at me funny again, laughed and just shook her head.. .
i told him that if i said i was sorry, i knew that is what they wanted to hear but it was not the truth.
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jukief
Dave, I said "when you met us," not years later at the beach house. (Do you still remember the first time you met us? That time you came to our house wearing that big old black coat and dressed to the nines?) No, don't tell the tale of how you deliberately got me drunk so I'd make a fool of myself, then led me down the garden path. (Note that Alan doesn't need any help getting drunk.) I'd have to get even with you if you did, and that wouldn't be pretty. :-)
Love you, Dave! kiss kiss
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MY CONSULTING TRIP TO BETHEL (starting over) PART 6
by seven006 inwithin a few weeks i leased a condo on the banks of the willamette river just out side the city of portland.
as she got into her car she looked at me funny again, laughed and just shook her head.. .
i told him that if i said i was sorry, i knew that is what they wanted to hear but it was not the truth.
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jukief
Hey, Dave! When are you going to get to the part where you meet US? That's the best part of the story!
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A Secret about DF'ing that Elders will not tell you.
by Amazing inone of the big issues affecting ex-jws is being shunned by their close relatives.
this can be especially painful for parents, children or siblings.
the jw relative may even make some exceptions to associate in the name of "necessary" business, but then later on their conscience "pricks" them, and they realize that they have pushed the envelope too much and they withdraw their association altogether ... or ... the society comes out with some article or the co comes to town, and manage to ding on some issue that make jws feel guilty about associating with df'd and da'd relatives.
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jukief
My brother, a long-time elder and now a circuit overseer, stopped associating with me almost 20 years ago. I've never been disfellowshipped or reproved; neither have I diassociated myself. His reasoning is that I'm an apostate because I left the religion (and therefore god, in his mind) and because I don't believe the JW teachings. I tried to reason with him about the fact that I got baptized as a minor, and that if I'd known then what I know now, I never would have been baptized. It doesn't matter to him. I left the religion; I'm an apostate. Very black and white. He's convinced my sister to take the same stand.
The funny thing is that he made this decision long before I married Alan, the arch-apostate. Now he's really scared to death of me!
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40
Are you related to anyone famous?
by Mulan ini thought this might be a fun "fluff" thread.
someone posted the other day that marc anthony (the singer) is their cousin.
i have done extensive genealogy research so i know a few famous relatives.
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jukief
I'm related to a famous apostate.
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16
Ever feel like you just wanna chuck it all in.....?
by ScoobySnax inok i'm whinging here, but have you ever felt that way about your job/career?
take today, i'm supposed to be on pa (holiday) from my job, but got called in this morning, turned up on my ward, and ended up staying all day to support the nurses in the team.
we had 3 cardiac arrests, 1 psychotic patient who was threatening to stab someone, and the usual abusive relatives, who can't seem to see beyond themselves and what they expect.
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jukief
Scooby, want to trade jobs?
I got my degree in technical/specialized journalism and have worked in marcom/publishing for the last 15 years or so. I've had regrets for the last five years or so that I didn't train in nursing, which I think was really my calling. And I'm so incredibly bored with my job. I edit the most mind-numbing technical articles, some of them so badly written it's pathetic.
I'm half joking about trading jobs, of course. Yes, I'm really fed up with my job, too, for some of the same reasons (layoffs, short staffed, stupid management moves, etc.) but you're dealing with life-and-death matters, while I just deal with words and bad authors and deadlines. Your situation puts my job dissatisfaction into perspective.
I've thought a lot about changing careers, too. They always say that your skills "transfer" to other areas. But in these times of high unemployment and scarce jobs, I'm not sure such a career move is possible right now. It's frustrating, isn't it? I agree with you about the management side of the job, though. I've managed staff, and I'm much happier now being a peon and having to worry only about myself. Maybe you should give up the management position and go back to being staff. That would alleviate at least part of the stress.
In the meantime, soaking up the sun in Greece sounds like a good short-term solution. Good luck, whatever you decide to do.
Julie Feuerbacher
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31
Were You Ever Persecuted While Knocking on Doors?
by Funchback ini recently posted a news article about how a jw said they get dogs sicced on them or they get urine thrown on them.
the worst thing that ever happened to me was when a chubby man with long blonde hair and glasses opened the door and said, "no!
there is no f--king god!
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jukief
When I was about 8 years old, my best friend and I were working together door to door. Someone shot at us. I was too young to know what kind of gun it was (my guess now is it was a pellet gun of some sort), but I felt the projectile whiz right past my face. It misses me by inches. Another time, when I was 10 years old, I was going door to door with an elderly brother (we were in unassigned territory). At one door, the man who answered the door was really angry and started shouting at us. The brother answered him very calmly and said that we would leave, but as we turned to walk away, the householder ran out of the house and kicked the elderly brother in the ass, sending him tumbling down about a dozen stairs. After he stumbled to his feet and we started down the sidewalk toward the car, the man ran after us, yelling at us not to go to any other houses in the town. We got to the car and drove to the sheriff's office to file a report. When the sheriff went back to the man's house, he had cleared out. We left and went back home, where we belonged.
My dad got attacked by two dogs once. He used his big leather briefcase to protect his legs; it was shredded and his literature was strewn all over the street.
My mom had a householder say, "Just a minute," when she offered the magazines. My mom thought the woman was going to get change, but when she came back to the door, she had a gun in her hand, which she pointed at my mom.
My sister had a bird poop in her hair one time when we were working door to door. That was probably the worst experience of all, because she was about 15 and had long beautiful hair. I remember using handbills to try to get it out of her hair.