Posts by jurs

45

I married a stranger, did you?

by kenpodragon in

jw
friends

in my current life i know a lot of people who live together.

some of them might have done this because they do not like marriage, and others have done this as a step towards getting married.

in all, in my post-witness life i find that i have no problem with either view.

jurs

Kenpodragon,

What a nice story!! My husband and I were strangers as well. We were married before I ever studied and became a JW though. We both worked in a casino together and would have drinks after work. I became pregnant after knowing him 3 months. We got married and boy did we get to know each other fast!!! Its strange but we knew each other VERY WELL in a short amount of time.

About a year after we were married I started studying with the witnesses. I stopped doing drugs, drank in moderation, quit my casino job, quit gambling, smoking ect. ect. I'm a total different person than who he married but he still knew me well.

I'm trying to get to the funny part ,so bare with me. Our marriage has been up and down and we have had some rip roaring fights , there's times I think we absolutely hate one another. We're certainly not the ideal couple.

Well we got invited to a JW's home for a get together with some other couples. My husband is the only non JW. We played this game ( I can't remember the name of it) . Your spouse has to answer some questions and you have to pretty much guess how they'd answer. Anyway, One couple took it real serious and were not doing well. Their answers were not compatible with one another. The wife was pretty upset. My husband and I kicked butt! We won by a long stretch.

I would recommend that before anyone marries they get to know that person real well!! Sometimes it works out like yours did but its too big of a commitment to take that chance.

jurs

8

I'm afraid about her...

by Zaanieth in

at first, sorry for my bad english.. i found this forum in bbc when i was looking for something about jws because this sect became a big problem in my life 3 or 4 months ago.. last 4 years, it began on elementary and now it continues on high school, i was in love with one girl, but i didn't know much about her, because she was entering group b and i was entering group a in the school.

i wanted to know more about her so i didn't tell it her and long time i hoped that will be a situation when i will speak with her.

but this wasn't happened.

jurs

Zaanieth,

Your english is quite good!!

There isn't really much you can do to make this friend leave this religion. I remember what it is like to be in love at 18 but believe me you don't want to be involved with a Jehovah witness no matter how much your heart is drawn towards her. The religion will always come first and you second. If , lets say ,you get married, your children would be raised this way no matter how you may feel. You won't celebrate holidays and time will be taken away because she and your kids will be at meetings and out in service. Everything is affected. If one day the 2 of you should marry you will also be marrying the organization. Its hard to explain but even if you are not a witness it will still affect YOUR life in a big way. Why fall more in love with someone whom later will make your life more unhappy. Find a diffrent girl! Thats not what you probably want to hear but later you'll be glad.

jurs

25

Therapy

by Moxy in

jw
friends

im breaking a long absence to ask a question during this evening of soul-searching in what i believe to be the best place to ask it.

i dont know how many people are still here who remember me well, so first a 'hi and miss you guys' to those who are.. im wondering about therapy.

i always thought i had a pretty good handle on my life despite the upheaval of leaving the witnesses.

jurs

I started seeing a counselor a few months ago and it kindof ,sortof ,has helped. There are some things I don't like to discuss with friends. I really don't want them to know about my crumbling marriage or that I don't speak to my mother or that I was in what I believe to be a cult and am trying to figure out whats what. I find that its better to have a facade that I've got my shit together rather than have them ask every time they see me if "everythings ok" Also there have been times where I have shared information about my background to a friend and I think I made them uncomfortable by doing that. I think its better to talk to a counselor who is not apart of your life or "HERE " where you'll probably never see these people. It saves embarrasment by completely baring your soul to someone who may not really want to hear it. just my opinion .jurs

133

Why Im ignoring my friends.

by refiners fire in

jw
friends

ive basically kept this under wraps in so far as this board is concerned, but ive decided to tell about it because, frankly, im under stress at the moment,am posting (when i post at all) a bit strangely and i wish to explain why im hardly posting, nor am i hardly responding to emails or chat requests from my friends here.

i apologize for the latter.

in a nutshell, my wife is sick, shes been sick a year now and the situation is getting worse.

jurs

I'm a bit lost and don't understand the duel of typed words between Farkel and RF, but to RF , I'm sorry about your wife. Huggs to both of you.

jurs

24

I am reaching my breaking point!

by gilwarrior in

i just got back from the palms casino where i lost $60 dollars.

that had to be the worst game of poker i have ever had.

i got home and everything just started coming to me.

jurs

Hi Gil,

Hang in there! I also thought you got excellent advice. I just want you to know that we're here for you! jURS

29

Which meeting was the worst?

by freedom96 in

jw
friends

i absolutely detested the watchtower study.

never did an hour go by so slow.

there would the 20 or so paragraphs that had to read and answered, and i would watch the clock.

jurs

The theocratic ministry school! It was at night and I was tired!!! But the worst were assemblies and conventions. I had an unbelieving mate so I went alone. The lunch break was awful because I felt so alone!!! It is not a loving org. JW's are not friendly! Just go to a convention to find out!

jurs

10

WTS SPY...

by happysunshine in

i was considering revealing my identity soon, but had a thought.

although i'm not active, i am well respected by my family and the witnesses from my past.

perhaps i could do more good for my family/friends and massive damage to the wt if i was to become active again.

jurs

I've been thinking about "your having some pull" because you are a foreignor. I can see where that may be the case but it could backfire. Many more will see you identified as a JW and perhaps be impressed that you are one. You may be influencing someone without ever having a conversation with them. When I was a JW we had a brother in our hall who was on Denvers news channel. He missed alot of meetings and wasn't real active but for some reason I was kindof impressed that he was a witness. I suppose I was a wee bit shallow. This same hall had a number of brothers that were sucessful and again it made me feel better that such "smart" people were brothers. You won't be able to talk to everyone you see, but you may be influencing them anyway, and in a way that is opposite of what you want. I say , Honesty is the best policy. If your being a phoney (even with good intentions) people will see through you eventually and you may loose their trust forever.

Be a straight shooter!!!!

jurs

51

Did anyone really ever study?

by freedom96 in

jw
friends

i know we were taught to study all the wts stuff.

prepare for each meeting, prepare for service, (gotta know the articles) etc.

i mean with all the personal study to do, how could anyone have time for newspapers, novels etc.

jurs

I studied for the small book study. I tried to study my watchtower for the Sunday meeting, but usually it was hurried. I rarely studied the KM and magazines for service. I was completely overwhelmed!!! I tried to keep up but wasn't able to.

jurs

19

Are You All Talk?

by Guest 77 in

jw
friends

yes, how bold are you.

i sense that some like to throw their weight around on forums of this nature.

in person, what are you like?

jurs

This is pretty much me! My best experience to share was when I DA'd myself! It will be a fond memory for years to come!!! I was completely ready for the elders. I had advice from posters as well as Ray Franzs book. I was looking up scriptures as fast as lightning and telling them their as bad as the Pharisees. One elder ,no kidding , was pale and shakey and told me Some words can't be taken back and that I hurt his feelings because he was tender hearted. I told him ,aid and shunning hurts and he does it. Anyhow its a long story. My mouth does get me in trouble but I usually mean what I say but many times I do have to apologize. I speak first and think later.

jurs

19

Frustrated and Lonely in Las Vegas

by gilwarrior in

after spending sometime in self imposed exile i am back!

anyway, i have been living in las vegas for about a month and a half.

so far i have had my ups and downs.

jurs

Hi Gil,

Things will get better. hang in there.

jurs