Posts by jws

5

Looking for Birth Parents

by meadow77 in

jw
friends

i myself was not adopted, however my husband's mother was.

she passed away seven years ago and both of her adoptive parents are gone now as well.

i have always been interested in finding more about her birth family for a couple of reasons.

My wife went through a similar thing. Her adopted parents knew about it and were OK with it. I think she started with a judge to unseal the records because she was having a medical problem and wanted to find out actual family history. Even at that, certain information was hidden. But she did find out she had 2 older brothers and an older sister and some basic information about them and known medical history. I think the medical history search was the thing that clinched it for the judge. I don't remember if she eventually got a name or accidentally saw something she shouldn't when she got the records she did, but we eventually tracked them down.

By the way, most birth certificates are changed to show the adopted parents, so that doesn't help.

Her mother died 20 years ago. She has a half sister who she's met, and two half-brothers who she hasn't. As far as we can tell, her mother was divorced and had an affair that produced her. We have no idea who her father is (judging by our daughter, I'd say he was probably a circus acrobat). The siblings were sent to live with grandma for a few months, so they didn't even know they had a sister.

I thought finding them was great. From the moment I saw my wife's adopted family, I saw she looked out of place. She looked different and behaved a little differently. When she told me she was adopted, I knew why. I think you get to know a person better by seeing their birth family. Some things she inherited from her birth family, not from her adopted one. Meeting her sister let me get to know my wife better. It also gives me insight into our children.

But, there can be a scary side to that too. Sometimes you may find family and wish you never did. They may be a bunch of sleazebags. I've heard enough stories of bad relatives to know that sometimes you wish you weren't related to some of them. By finding them you are aquiring these relatives and bringing them into your life. They may be criminals, drug addicts, somebody who will constantly hit you up for money, or steal from you. It's a risk. Watch Jerry Springer and wonder what it'd be like if those people were related to you. Who knows? They may actually be. We got lucky.

As for my wife, she's been hands-off. I think I was more excited about finding them than she was. Since finding them over 3 years ago, she's had no particular ambition to visit them aside from an event here and there. I think her sister was excited because she always wanted a little sister, but my wife seems satisfied with the family she was raised with. She hasn't even met her brothers yet. And it's not because they're bad people. I don't understand. I'd love to find out I had more brothers and sisters - people like me. But it's personal and it's something that didn't happen to me. So I can't truly understand.

Good luck in your search and I hope it ends well.

48

Are You A Happier Person Than When You Were In The "Truth"?

by minimus in

jw
friends

i see a lot of hopelessness and cynicism now.

are you actually happier now than when you were a jehovah's witness?

jws

I feel much more at peace with my life now.

But happier? Maybe. You've got to understand though, that those were the first 25 years of my life. I was younger, fewer responsibilities, more naive. Everything new was exciting. I think most people would say they were happier in their early 20s than they are in their late 30's.

I also remember getting a thrill out of leading a double-life in the last 5 years or so. I felt sort of like a James Bond type, keeping secrets, doing what we could to stay one step ahead of the elders. It was a great thrill. I do know I was much happier as a JW after I started leading a double life.

13

Are you planning to see....

by Flowerpetal in

jw
friends

mel gibson's new movie about jesus' cruixifiction?

jws

I loved Braveheart, for which Mel Gibson won an Oscar for best director.

I don't understand why you'd make a film in an ancient language that nobody speaks. I could see doing a film about Germany in German or a film about Italy in Italian, but those are languages at least somebody can understand and enjoy.

Sometimes you don't need words to understand though. I lot of good silent films were made without words or very few words and you could still understand what was happening. Albiet with overexagerated acting to get the message across.

As for anti-semitism? Give me a break. We're going off the record of a religious book and what is contained in it. Granted, some people may say the whole story is made up, but let's say it's true. It's only showing what happened. Should we rewrite history for what we'd like it to have been? For that matter, the whole Christian part of the Bible is basically anti-semetic because it is replacing the Jewish belief system.

What's next, Germans protesting Schindler's list as racist because it depicts some Germans killing and torturing Jews? If it happened, is it racist to depict it as part of a historical drama?

11

'Panic At Bethel' (written 6/03)

by sf in

jw
friends

i tried a search to see if this page had been posted (and thusly did not see it).

perhaps others have missed it as well:.

http://www.escapethewatchtower.com/crackdown.htm.

jws

Just thought about something else. January to March are some pretty cold months here in the US. Seems to me, field service was always down on cold days. And many elders don't pull their weight for field service as it is.

Maybe this was a way to give them something to do to get their hours up and help keep hours up during cold months.

11

'Panic At Bethel' (written 6/03)

by sf in

jw
friends

i tried a search to see if this page had been posted (and thusly did not see it).

perhaps others have missed it as well:.

http://www.escapethewatchtower.com/crackdown.htm.

jws

This all started last October, if I remember right. Caspian posted about it. They had announced at his annual elder meeting that they were going to start a campaign to find the inactive ones and that the campaign was going to run from January to March. This was only the public announcment that it had been going on.

As I recall, a few people got contacted, though I don't recall any severe results. But most of us never heard from them.

Some shepherds of their flock, eh? Never hear from them. And they have to have a special campaign to get them to go find their lost sheep. And even then, it lasts 3 months and they go back to business as usual.

You can bet none of them, upon first hearing the idea, said "great idea, why wait until January, let's start now".

6

NWT??

by proudassmonkey in

jw
friends

ok well here's the thing i want to be able to refute what parents have to say or will have to in response to the email i will sned them in response.. is that confusing enough?

but i can't find an online site w/ the new world translation.

i don't want a copy of their bible.

jws

I think it would be hard to quote from their Bible without having one. I don't know if you're anywhere near a used book store like Half Priced Books. I see them there all the time. You can probably pick one up for under $5. That way, it doesn't come with a Witness attached, trying to convert you. Freeminds.org also sells old JW literature. I'm sure they have plenty of copies, again without the JW attached.

I think you can go to www.watchtower.org too and there's a place to sign up to receive a brand new copy for free. But, like you were worried about, I'm sure the local JWs will get a call and sent to go visit you. (You could always use a fake name when you sign up and when they come to visit tell them your roommate just moved out).

Since it's translated to suit their doctrine, it's not a reputable bible and you won't find people jumping at the chance to provide it online. And if you did, the Watchtower would probably order it taken down over copyright issues. (Funny how a non-profit organization that claims to have the most accurate translation doesn't want it in its most widely available state, huh?)

You could also try to find any CD of the Watchtower Library if you want it in electronic form.

20

GROWING UP AS AN EIGHTIES WITNESS

by josephus in

jw
friends

i was my nephews birthday party tonight.

my sister (who i didnt speak to for 15 years because she was dffd was the hostess).. all was well, and we got to talking about growing up as a kid in the truth.

my mum was there and i admoitted to thinking from as early as i could remember till i was about 20 the "the end" was coming any minute.

jws

I was a teenager in the 80's. I was getting into computers and working with another guy to build a ministry school scheduler. It was a big hit for a while. Individual sheets with your name at the top and your assignment(s) highlighted in bold. Then it was banned because, in the great tribulation, lists like these could lead them to find us. So, only one copy at the hall that could easily be destroyed. So, the paranoia was there.

I always got a bit confused. Armageddon was supposed to sneak up on us at any time. So, if this massive persecution was going to happen, then Armageddon was going to be later, after this persecution? So, I didn't have to worry until things started getting bad for us, right? I think I remember somebody saying that we may not know what the great tribulation was until it's over. So, I was supposed to fear Armageddon coming any day because maybe we're in the great tribulation already. I think another person said we might not have it here in the US.

I remember having talks telling us what others were doing to secretly do the preaching. My resolve was that if it ever got that risky, I'd never go again, no matter what my parents said.

I personally remember being more afraid of that type of stuff when I was younger. Maybe it's an age thing. When you get a little older and these things still haven't happened, you start to relax and eventually wonder if they will ever happen.

36

Last Assembly!

by Euphemism in

just wanted to let everyone know that today, piph and i attended the last day of our last borg assembly ever!

the feeling walking out was wonderful.

my heart kind of sank a little when i remembered that i still had to attend meetings for a little over a month.

jws

Congratuations and good luck on your leaving. I used to feel happy when people became JWs. Now I'm even happier when people leave.

I didn't know that my last meeting or last convention was my last one. I sort of became inactive by circumstance and read COC during this time and chose not to return. But I think it would have been better to know. I could have taken one last look around, talked with old friends for the last time, and savored the leaving. I think it would have offered some closure sooner too.

30

Where do you believe the watchtower organization will be in 20 years?

by micheal in

jw
friends

i know if any of us had our way the org.

would be gone tomorrow.

but in realistic terms, what condition will this cruel organization be in in 20 years.. .

jws

Will the JWs be around in 20 years? Without a doubt. There's still Bible Students around that still follow C.T. Russell. And if they still believe that stuff, I'm sure there's JWs who will still hang on, no matter what.

The JWs seem to thrive on distress where they can offer a magic solution. They did a great job in post WW2 war-torn Europe. They do great in the third world. It seems this world is headed for more uncertain times. The US economy is bad. We have the threat of terrorism hanging over us and, what's more, it's got religious overtones that could be spun into fulfillment of prophecy. This is exactly the type of thing that makes people ripe for the picking for JWs.

There is also new blood at the top. Every past administration has brought a new focus and doctrinal changes. The generation thing didn't happen until Milton Henschel took over and Fred Franz was dead. (or have I got my timing off?) Well, when the last of the governing body is gone, expect more changes. I expect the younger ones see that things like 1914 are ridiculous and will stop supporting it and eventually drop it. Likewise possibly for blood and other doctrines.

The JWs do so well with changes. A few people get fed up and leave, but the majority stay. The JWs are very effective at changing course and getting people to follow along and eventually forget they had even changed course.

The internet is a great tool for harm against them. But the more they change, the less critics have to criticize. When I have something to say about them, it's the JWs of pre-1990, not the JWs of 2023. How valid will my criticisms still be?

And I've heard ideas tossed about before that may even take away the internet threat. If reports can be believed, the Scientologists had secret software installed that blocked anti-Scientology websites. With JWs, they could probably release such a thing publicly and the JWs will welcome it as their "mother" trying to protect them from Satan.

So, I see them surviving by dropping a lot of baggage doctrine and becoming a bit more mainstream, taking a harder line towards filtering critics, and political and economic stress wouldn't hurt either.

22

Ever come close to blows with another witness?

by Dimples in

jw
friends

i once went to a baby shower for a sister and planned on having a good time.

there were only sisters there and some brought their children.

the shower was held at a community center clubhouse.

jws

As a kid, I remember fights every now and then with the other kids at the hall, but I assume that sort of thing is common.

After growing up, our hall had congregation football games on Sundays. When there was snow on the ground and the landing wasn't as hard, it changed from touch to tackle. Usually the quarterbacks ended up being the elders because they were around 40 and weren't in shape to run down field play after play. My brother and I were a bit more muscular than most of the people and often got put on the front lines as rushers and blockers. Because we'd usually arrive together late, we usually got split up to different teams. So I'd be rushing against my brother and vice-versa. Sometimes we'd signal each other and pretty much let the other come through untouched if we could lay a really good sack on one of our "favorite" elders. So, we got the pleasure of smashing them into the snow now and then and I remember some of those tackles being pretty hard. We're talking a full-body dive into them at a good speed. A few times they got really pissed off, but it was all just part of the game... so nobody accused us of anything deliberate and we were asked to go a little easier next time (until next week...).