Posts by ABibleStudent

18

A letter from my Mom

by ateograciasadios in

jw
friends

friends,.

i have seen several posts like the following, and never thought i would have to write one myself, but here we go: my dear mom is forcing me to make a move... one that i have been really avoiding as much as possible.

she wrote me an email today, and here i am giving you an idea of its contents.

ABibleStudent

Welcome ateograciasadios, I'm sorry that your mother's cult persona is trying to emotionally coerce you to behaving as a JW.

I would write your mother the following note to politely confront her and to find out what she is implying, because she did not write that she will be shunning you:

Dear Mom,

I'm very confused by your last letter to me where you wrote, "I will have to arrive to the inevitable conclusion that you have left Him, which means you are also leaving me." Mom, I love you unconditionally and have no plans leaving you. Are you planning on leaving me? What are you trying to tell me? Also, who is brother Brown?

I will call you (insert a time).

I'm (insert what you are doing or what you want to write her).

Love,

Pease be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert

67

I have an honest question!

by FL_Panthers in

jw
friends

it's with regards to disfellowshipping.. is disfellowshipping a legal procedure?

like is there something i can use to prevent this from happening to me if it does happen.. no jokes about me being a bad little boy.

i need honest answers to this.

ABibleStudent

FL_Panthers - The only thing I am worried about is my relationship with my rents. I have a feeling that if I fade they wont speak to me again. Armageddon doesn't really come in my mind in my day to day life. So you could say that I'm a witness for the wrong reason.

Hi FL_Panthers, If you are afraid that your parents will shun you if you are Df'ed, how do you feel they will treat you if they know you are inactive?

Start making your plan to fade. Your first step should be to vent your frustrations about the WTBTS/JWs on JWN and your second step should be to independently research the WTBTS to either confirm that the WTBTS is a dangerous cult or that the WTBTS is the sole "True Religion". Once you have convinced yourself of what the WTBTS is, then you can make more decisive decisions. In the mean time as long as JWs do not suspect your true feelings, there are no adverse consequences for you. JWN members will treat you respectfully as long as you reciprocate. JWs will not if you will not blindly follow the WTBTS.

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert

24

What is definition of a true friend, once outside the cult?

by suavojr in

jw
friends

after leaving the cult of jw's or waking up to ttatt, it is a struggle to trust people again.

i am personally starting from scratch although i am still in.

each moment i spend with my current jw friends, i know they are all smiles and loving towards me because of my good status with the wt.. outside a cult you still find fake people and it is also a struggle to find true friends and it is even worst when we've been hit hard from people we used to trust and care for.. .

ABibleStudent

Hi suavojr, Your JW phobias are showing.

Take your time - there is no rush. Do activities that you enjoy where you can meet non-JWs. Have conversations with people, ask them questions, tell them a little about yourself, and share experiences with each other. Eventually you will either feel a mutual interest or not. It takes time to build healthy and unconditional relationships. Conditional relationships are easier to make and break.

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert

36

...WBT$/JW Preaching at the Door with a Cell Phone?!...

by OUTLAW in

........................ ........................will jw`s be using their cell phone or tablet.. ...............to show a wbt$ video to people in the field service?!!...

........................... .................................... .. .......................................click the link below:.

................................................... http://www.jehovahswitnessrecovery.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=14&t=19681.

ABibleStudent

If BITE control depends on emotional attachment to JWs, won't more reliance on technology and less on social interaction backfire on the WTBTS? I hope so!

If JWs start showing me propaganda via the internet on a smartphone/tablet, I am planning to take out my smart phone and show them videos of Steve Hassan or "ApostateChick". I hope someone creates powerful, less than 2 minute videos to reverse witness to JWs, so that I can reverse witness better.

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert

43

Why JWs don't celebrate Mother's day

by Laika in

in the uk, this sunday is mother's day!

ask a jw why they don't celebrate holidays and they'll tell you it's because of some nefarious pagan connection.

but this is really just a cover.

ABibleStudent

Hi baltar447, Try it without the "http://". You got to love JWN's quirks - it keeps life interesting.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=X0DeIqJm4vM

To all the JW mothers out there, HAPPY MOTHERS DAY to you.

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert

41

Discussion with some elders

by GoUnion in

hello everyone just wanted to relate a situation that occurred a few days ago.

so i have quit going to meetings for a few months now based on some issues i have with the explanations of current doctrines.

my wife is none too happy with this but over the last few months we have had some date nights and have tentitively agreed to disagree.

ABibleStudent

Hi GoUnion, Since the WTBTS uses BITE control techniques to coerce JWs to do what the WTBTS wants and not what God or Jesus Christ wants, isn't that a form of evil? Even Jesus Christ labeled the Pharisees and Sadducees as "ferocious wolves" in Matthew 7:15 [ True and False Prophets ] “Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves."

The WTBTS may not be evil, but it is a very hypocritical organization. JWs can appear to be very caring and loving to JWs, but only as long as one is a JW in good standing. Is it evil for the WTBTS to promote that JWs must shun former JWs and tear apart families just because former JWs do not believe the WTBTS is God's sole channel for JWs? Is it evil for the WTBTS to pressure families not to except whole blood transfusions and possibly die to comply with a warped and unscriptual "Blood" doctrine created by Freddy Franz/Nathan Knorr? Is it evil for the WTBTS to be so controlling that JWs create a cult persona and authentic persona to live by the controlling doctrines of the WTBTS?

In time as the BITE control wears off you will start to full-fill your potential and your opinion may change about the WTBTS.

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert

12

HI

by LillyC in

i have only just joined but thinking of giving up already.. it does not seem very easy to use this forum really.

my topic does not seem visible.

i don't know how to do my profile or anything.. finding it difficult.. .

ABibleStudent

Hi LillyC, You are right that this forum is not very intuitative.

If you want to see what you have posted, click on your username "LillyC" at the top of this thread or in the top right-hand corner of this webpage. Your personal page will be displayed with the last three options as "Topics Started", "Topics Posted On", and "Send Messages" in the blue menu bar. Clicking on the options button underneath your username in the top right-hand corner of the webpage only expands or compresses the webpage on you display. Clicking on the envelope next to your username in the top right-hand corner of the webpage will display messages that you have received. If no number is on the envelope you have no messages.

I hope that aforementioned comments help you and that you will continue to post on this forum.

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert

26

I am DF'd and a JW sister called me to tell me she wants to leave

by KateWild in

one of my dear loved ones called me.

she knows i am df'd and she wanted to reach out to me.

she fell away for a few years, and when she came back i had a study with her before she became active again.

ABibleStudent

HI KateWild, DITTO what other posters have written about listen to your friend first and then show her what may help her. Collect a smorgasbord of information that you can email her and/or show her after you learn what she wants. Also, do not under estimate the power of BITE control, so help your friend to realize that she is now empowered to live her life to her full potential and that she has many options to choose from.

IMHO your friend probably feels disillusioned with the WTBTS and feels worthless and possibly stupid. To help your friend overcome those feelings, I would recommend that you show her How Big is the Phenomenon of Undue Influence? (2:01) and Strategic Interactive Approach explained 2003 (1:23:23). You need to be there when she watches those videos to help her to feel good about herself.

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert

63

First Post...Hi everyone! Thanks for all of your help over the years!

by stuckinarut2 in

jw
friends

well... as they say on talk back radio "i'm a long time listener, first time caller"(poster in this case!).

i have been a "lurker" for several years, but never had the courage to take the step and join up...until now.. i really want to thank everyone for their insights and comments throughout the forum.

although i have not contibuted to discussions, i have benefitted very much from all of your comments and observations on all topics.

ABibleStudent

stuckinarut2 - I know that there is well known expresion that "those who fail to plan, plan to fail", but I cant work out what to do yet...but through this forum I see that I am not alone, and that is a positive step forward so far...

Hi stuckinarut2, Plans can be simple, specific, detailed, and/or complex. The simple and specific plans seem to be easier to execute.

The follwoing is a simple and specific plan:

Vent on JWN to reduce your frustrations as well as ask members for specific advice to help you to help JW family and friends how to critically think for themselves.
Research the WTBTS history and changes in doctrines by visiting reputable websites like www.jwfacts.com, www.watchtowerdocuments.com, etc. and reading books by Raymond Franz (i.e., "Crisis of Conscience" and "In Search of Christian Freedom") and Don Cameron ("Captive of a Concept").
Research how to overcome BITE control techniques by visiting reputable websites like www.freedomofmind.com, reading books by Steve Hassan (i.e., "Combatting Cult Mind Control", "Releasing the Bonds: Empowering People to Think for Themselves", and (his latest book) "Freedom of Mind: Helping Loved Ones Leave Controlling People, Cults and Beliefs"), and watching Steve Hassan's FREE videos on his website.
Learn how to ask simple questions of JWs like in the exJW Psychology 102--How to Ask a Question When Questions Aren't Allowed by Billy the Ex-Bethelite to help your JW family and friends to critically think for themselves.
Get more education/training to qualify for a better paying career. (Provides an excuse for missing more meetings.)
Learn how to help JWs to stop using thought-stopping platitudes, such as "They are imperfect men . . . ", "Where else will we go?", etc.
Invite your JW family and friends to attend fun outings where they can meet more non-JWs who they share common interests.
Help your JW family and friends to become involved in more time consuming hobbies so that they spend less time reading WTBTS propagcanda.
Help your JW family and friends to use the internet to find cheaper and better hotels than are on the WTBTS's approved list of hotels to attend convenctions/assemblies and to improve their criticall thinking skills. (Your goal would be for JWs to view the internet is a valuable reasource to verify claims made by other people including WTBTS elders and the GB.)
If you plan to fade more painlessly, find another job in another city where you do not know any JWs.

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert

P.S. - Although it is best to write plans down, writing plans down does not mean that you cannot change them as circumstances change.

3

Something to consider when revealing WT history to your JW and a funny story

by Jon Preston in

new things to add to our fade (wife and i).

first, we just attended a gathering sunday with a bunch of jws.

it all went as you would suspect--met a kid i imagine is gay but his friends just claim hes very sheltered, typical monitoring of music to make sure nothing bad was on, prayer to jehovah giving thanks for the latest wt article, and a mother complaining about some adults having an alcoholic beverage and how wrong it was at this type of gathering.... but what tops it off is what my daughter said to a brother near the end of the day.. she has a toy she brought and played with the whole time since there werent many iids her age there.

ABibleStudent

Hi Jon Preston, Until your wife stops using thought-stopping platitudes like "they were imperfect, but still the best people out there and closest to the truth", it won't matter how many times you prove that the WTBTS's leaders make mistakes.

How would your wife respond to something like the following?

"How many and what kinds of mistakes would the WTBTS need to make for you to become so skeptical of the WTBTS that you would stop making excuses for it? How come the GB/elders are imprefect men, but I would be shunned and you would be marked for not blindly following the WTBTS doctrines such as allowing our daugther to have fun by going to a birthday party? Although I enjoy spending time with our JW friends, how are they better than our non-JW family and friends who will not shun use for allowing our daughter to attend a birthday party.

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert