Hi SonoftheTrinity, I would recommend helping your stepchildren to critically think for themselves and encourage them to make reputable non-JW friends. Also, your step-children can always say it is a very important decision to them and that they are waiting on Jehovah to guide them.
I would recommend trying some of the following:
- Read information by cult-exit counselors like Steve Hassan's books (i.e., "Combatting Cult Mind Control", "Releasing the Bonds: Empowering People to Think for Themselves", and (his latest book) "Freedom of Mind: Helping Loved Ones Leave Controlling People, Cults and Beliefs"), visit his website at www.freedomofmind.com, and/or watch his FREE videos on his website. Except for the first edition of CCMC (printed in 1989), I would not recommend reading the aforementioned books in front of JWs. CCMC is ok because it doesn't mention that the Watchtower is a dangerous cult. You can either checkout these books from a local library, or purchase them in e-book formats or paperback.
- I recommend that you watch the following four videos to convince yourself that Steve Hassan's ideas can help you before buying his books: How Big is the Phenomenon of Undue Influence? (2:01), The BITE Model (Behavior Information Thought Emotion) (5:03), What is the Strategic Interactive Approach? (4:21), Strategic Interactive Approach explained 2003 (1:23:23).
- If you are financially well off, I would also recommend talking with Steve Hassan or one of his coaches by calling 617-396-4638 about specific ideas to help your wife and step-children.
- Learn how to ask simple questions like Billy the Ex-Bethelite did in the thread exJW Psychology 102--How to Ask a Question When Questions Aren't Allowed. You can ask JWs difficult questions by pretending that you did not know how to respond to a question that someone asked you about JWs. Also, ask simple questions to learn more about what a JW's authentic persona loves to do.
- Read the threads by Aussie Oz about his son like Thankyou dad, for making me think... .
- Learn how to turn-off a JW's cult persona and empower a JW's authentic persona.
- Learn how to overcome thought-stopping platitudes that JWs use, like why does a JW feel that the Watchtower has the "Truth". Does that mean that other religions are teaching falsehoods? What proof do JW's have that the Watchtower is teaching the "Truth"? Don't accept general answers. Ask for specific proof in a curious tone of voice and demeanor. Or, when JWs say "Where else shall we go?, ask them "Don't you mean to whom shall you go? According to John 6:68-69, Simon Peter said to Jesus Christ. Listen to JWs to learn what platitudes or cult-speak (i.e., "Worldly", "Apostate", etc.) that they use, and then afterwards think how you can overcome it and practise you delivery.
- Encourage JWs to independently research subjects they are interested in by using the internet (like making hotel and travel reservations). Once JWs learn how to search the internet and feel comfortable doing it, they may start searching the internet about Watchtower or Jehovah topics.
- If your wife attends conventions that are out of town, help her to make arrangements to stay at a nicer hotel away from JWs, so that her authentic persona can decompress after the convention by having fun with you and away from JWs.
- Encourage JWs to do fun, time-consuming, non-Watchtower activities/hobbies that they love and where they can meet more non-JWs.
Best of wishes to you.
Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,
Robert