Tread very carefully where your daughter is concerned. She is manipulating you by trying to get your sympathy and to side with her.
Sit down with your wife and ask her what is really upsetting her and you'd like to make things better for her. She probably feels like she has to deal with everything and you are not sharing the load with her (JW responsibilities) and this includes that possibly your daughter is not so interested in the religion. There's not much you can do about being a good JW just to make peace at home unless you feel so inclined but that won't do you any good mentally. Instead you'll need to deal with the behaviour in a more logical, down to earth way. For instance, in relation to your daughter ask her if your daughter's reaction was appropriate and what could have led to her bad feelings, discuss whether you both could have dealt with it differently.
Also ask her why it upset her so much that you didn't put your pledge slip in. This would be a good opportunity to tell her that you are not happy with the arrangement and that you feel that if/when you want to donate money you would rather do it from your heart rather than having your hand forced in providing a set amount.