I can't describe the heart-stopping fear I get. I literally feel like I'm going to self-destruct.
What you are feeling is called a panic attack, but you probably already know that. It goes with the territory of phobias and anxiety disorders. Might I suggest you spend an hour or so researching? The more you understand what is happening to you, the more you will be able to control it. You could start here. http://www.npadnews.com/