Hi everyone, I am just new to this site and thanks for a very dear friend that has encouraged me to post my story and would love to hear feedback from all you out there xx This is MY STORY We were introduced to the religion in 1982, not soon after we were unbaptized publishers (a bit to soon for me even at that age) I really didnt miss the celebrations as much as were werent that well off and my parents worked 6 days a week to pay the bills. My parents were baptized within 6 months and everything seemed fine. We them moved to another congregation (1 hour away from grand parents and cousins and aunts.) We moved to a new school and there were a few witness kids at the same school, we became good friends with this single mum of 6 kids, they used to come over all the time and play with us, they had this cute little girl at the time she was about 4 or so that latter became to be 6 or 7 and went into prep at the same school. At that time I think I was in grade 5 or 6. And thats when all my troubles started.... One night we get a phone call from the elders asking to speak to my dad and then arranging a time to come and see and speak with my mum and dad. They arrive at our house they are in the kitchen and us kids are in our rooms doing our homework. I get called in and mum is crying her head off, her head is down and I hear her sobbing, I walk in wondering whats happening and I start getting real concerned. They the elders start taling to me saying that this family have spoken to the elders about something I have done... I started thinking OMG my mum and dad know i rolled up some craft paper and smoked some hay behind the shed at home and now Im in big big trouble. But still I thought that if I act dumb they will believe that Im saying the truth. Little did I know that it was going to be much worse than that, they said that I was accused MOLESTING A CHILD, my reation was whats that as I had never heard of that word before as it happened 25 years ago and Im sure those words were not well know as much as they are now. Then the elder continued saying that I touched the little girl (family friend) that I had my hands in her undies I touched her when she was telling me not to... I had elders at my door nearly every night, accusing me and the thing was i didnt even understand what they were accusing me of not even knowing what the word "MOLESTERED" meant. At that age I only knew that I wanted to ease the pain and I tried killing myself by swallowing panadole tablets, but of couse my mum who was the only one that believed me caught me and stopped me from wrecking what was left of my life... It took my dad months to confront the child and he said that if she was lying that only one person would know and that god would punish her is she lied. She then told my dad that she was told to say that because her brother had a run in my with dad and he wanted to get him back!!!! My dad was told off by the elders for confronting her without permission from the parents or elders. A few days latter the mum came up to me and sincerly appologied!! Damage was done and it nothing could ever take away what I went thru, sadly I did accept the appology from the mum. Till today the elders have not appologized for the way they treated me. I even found it hard going to the meeting knowing everyone knew about me and when I got married and moved on to another cong i still felt that people were treating me funny, as to know from this sight that it never leaves you, your life is ruined for the rest of your life. At times I thought maybe I did do something and I thought it was right but that was the elders brainwashing me to believe that I did wrong. I loved kids when I was young that as soon as a baby was born I was one of these kids that hanged off the mother and father. I even had elderly people telling me to stop playing with the kids not knowing what they meant but now thinking back everyone must of known what I was accoused of. I have 3 kids now but I found it so hard even just changing my daughters nappy or even playing with them after bath time as you parents would have done with your kids. I can only say that I really felt for that child to have to go thru what her brother put her up to, but It has scared me for life. Again if my child accused anyone I would be at the authorites right away, they are the only people that can help. Church people are not experts and they are only out to protect their religions name. I kept this to myself and delt with it by myself not even my father knew what I was going thru. When ever I did mention it wich was hardly I would cry. I then came in contact with a friend who is very close to me who happens to be a phycologist after having a few private sessions with her and more crying now I can talk about it without having to cry or have a crackle in my voice. It might have taken my 25 years but they were hell to deal with and hope I can move on from now on. I even tied pioneering for some time but never was paised as they usually praise pioneers now looking back I know why. I have left the religion with my husband and kids and its been the smartest thing I ever did, but I must say that if I was the mother of that girl I would have gone to the authorites even if it were true or not. Hope to hear from you lovely people with some support from you. Agent86 xx |