Posts by TimeBandit

27

Ray Bradbury Died today

by NewChapter in

jw
friends

he was 91. he wrote fahrenheit 451 and the maritan chronicles.

i loved the martian chronicles.

i didn't read the other but saw the movie..

TimeBandit

Martian Chronicals, Something Wicked THis Way Comes, those two captured my imagination when I was a kid. Rest in Peace Ray!

Chris-

21

Dear Watchtower?

by ldrnomo in

i thought it would be fun to start a question and answer series.

i'll be the watchtower and you send in questions.. here's an example:.

dear watchtower,.

Is it wrong to pray when I'm in the shower? It seems to be the ultimate in humility being naked and vulnerable when praying to Jehobah. Usually I get a good feeling when I'm praying all naked in the shower like that, but sometimes I get aroused unintentionally after washing my privates. Do you think this makes Jehovah uncomfortale? Should I stop washing down there?

Sincerely,

TimeBandit.

32

Did You Feel Truly Loved By The Witnesses?

by minimus in

jw
friends

were you feeling the love from the "brothers" and "sisters"?

if you did, for how long?

?.

TimeBandit

No, I never felt loved by the JWs. I bent over backwards to 'widen out' and make freinds. Take brother 'Window Washer' out to lunch after the sunday meeting, then never hear from him again exept for a distracted hello in passing at the next meeting. A lot of things like that happened to me and my wife. Many times we would make plans to invite brother Janitor over to our house for dinner and he would never be available. Or this one- Trying to be part of a conversation in a small group of witnesses and have someone cut me off in the middle of what I'm trying to say and continue on like I never even said anything. That always made me feel good...

Shit, at least some of you guys got love bombed when you first joined up. I was pretty much a witness from 5 years old on so I didn't even get that. No one coming up to me and acting happy for me when I got reinstated one time made me feel like crap. For me the worst thing of all, and one of the reasons I left the witnesses was that I didn't feel loved by god any more. It seemed like I had this awesome relationship with god. I'd go on long walks and pray and gush my heart out to god and for a long time I felt like he loved me but then it stopped. I lost the feeling that he cared about me because I was going through some extreme emotional abuse from my jw parents (had two breakdowns because of them) and so I'd go outside at night, look up at the stars down on my knees and say tearful prayers begging him to help me. It only took a few times of doing that before I realized he wasn't going to be there for me. Looking back I feel like such an idiot for thinking he would help me.

Chris-

21

New Sparlock (TM) action figure collectibles? Ideas.

by AnnOMaly in

jw
friends

sparlocktm can't be on his own.

he needs some wizardy comrades, right?

sherlock - the logical one with an inbuilt bs meter;.

TimeBandit

Polock-Sparlock's mentally challenged but lovable little brother that loves dill pickles.

13

Head ship...

by TimeBandit in

the jw idea of headship is getting a blowjob followed by a sandwich...uh, wait, they only believe in the sandwich...uh, wait, they just jerk off to the idea of getting head.

uh, wait, they're not allowed to jerk off either.

damn.

TimeBandit

25

no praying before meals?

by londonlady in

jw
friends

i was recently in the company of a jw.

this is a long time devout jw and i served them a meal.

i was surprised by their reaction, they simply sat down, grabbed a fork and began shoveling???

TimeBandit

Here's how I see it. Why in the world would I thank the invisible SKYDADDY for food I worked so haerd to pay for?

Chris-

13

Head ship...

by TimeBandit in

the jw idea of headship is getting a blowjob followed by a sandwich...uh, wait, they only believe in the sandwich...uh, wait, they just jerk off to the idea of getting head.

uh, wait, they're not allowed to jerk off either.

damn.

TimeBandit

Thanks for the advice broken promises! I thnk I'll drink some more rum to lessen the hangover as well.

Chris-

13

Head ship...

by TimeBandit in

the jw idea of headship is getting a blowjob followed by a sandwich...uh, wait, they only believe in the sandwich...uh, wait, they just jerk off to the idea of getting head.

uh, wait, they're not allowed to jerk off either.

damn.

TimeBandit

I bet I'm the only guy in my community that knows what a clitoris is...I bet I'm the only one in my community that can flick it with my tongue and get my head squeezed to the point of my eyes popping out!

Chris-

13

Head ship...

by TimeBandit in

the jw idea of headship is getting a blowjob followed by a sandwich...uh, wait, they only believe in the sandwich...uh, wait, they just jerk off to the idea of getting head.

uh, wait, they're not allowed to jerk off either.

damn.

TimeBandit

She's going to be coming home from work in a little while. She Is an RN and an administrator at our local hospital. She works the night shift. I thought about offering her a body massage when she gets home but I'm afraid it will just turn into a ploy for me to seduce her. Maybe I'll just rub her feet after she makes ma a sandwich...

Chris-

13

Head ship...

by TimeBandit in

the jw idea of headship is getting a blowjob followed by a sandwich...uh, wait, they only believe in the sandwich...uh, wait, they just jerk off to the idea of getting head.

uh, wait, they're not allowed to jerk off either.

damn.

TimeBandit

My wife plays the piano and sings. I'm trying to teach her a Metallica song but it sounds sort of funny on the piano right now. I'd better get to practicing my Gibson Les Paul so I can play along when she practices 'Ride the Lightning'...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GI8xrnOrftM

Chris-