That is a really deep question, Randy and one that deserves a thoughtful answer from me. I can't speak for others, of course, and I know you are not expecting that. I will try to relate my own case without becoming maudlin.
My best friend Tom and I were extremely close, so close it was uncanny. We had a kind of mental and emotional resonance that has been observed in identical twins. Mutual friends said they could almost see the electricity flowing between us. So his suicide was a great trauma for me to suffer even though I had seen it coming. I blamed myself for a long time and sank into the deepest depression I have ever suffered.
One reason for that was undoubtedly feeling that Tom had betrayed me. I thought how could he have hurt me so badly? Another reason was failing to understand why any Witness would take his own life. After all, didn't we have "The Truth", and wasn't that sufficient to give us every reason for living? Who wouldn't want to live forever in paradise on Earth? All we had to do to attain it was be good Witnesses and everything would take care of itself.
Now I had other friends and they all rallied around me after Tom's suicide. I was never left alone or forced to cope with the loss by myself. But the questions I had wouldn't go away. Furthermore, I was "disciplined" by the congregation at that time, being publicly reproved. Dealing with the suicide of my best friend and facing a judicial committee at the same time is not a healthy mix. That thought never occurred to the elders, but it appalled my therapist who rightly questioned the sanity and goodness of a religion that would act in this manner. I could make no defense for it either other than to say, "That's the way it is with Jehovah's Witnesses."
My therapist was very good. She got me to look at the religion critically without herself directly attacking it. She helped me to understand that Tom had made a bad choice, and that it was his choice, not mine, which ended his life. Another big help at that time was my dear father. He was not a Witness although he respected the religion. Yet he told me that one big problem with religions like Jehovah's Witnesses was the belief that they had all the answers. My friend had had serious issues before becoming a Witness, and those issues did not magically disappear once he was baptized. All Tom had done was suppress them. He hadn't dealt with them, and in the end they resurfaced with a vengeance. The religion proved hopelessly inadequate in dealing with them.
As it was with Tom, so it proved with me. While I never lost my faith in God, I had to understand that the trite answers the WTS often gives to serious questions are, as I later told the judicial committee which disfellowshipped me, "inadequate, incomplete, and insufficient". Getting into counseling, talking to non-Witness friends, and reading a lot gradually helped me to regain my mental and emotional balance. Even so, I had a long journey before me to find the happiness which eluded Tom. That came only after I made the decision to never have anything to do with the WTS again.
So I hope this answers your questions, Randy. I'm sorry if my answer was too wordy, but I have given the best one I can. I'll be happy to answer any other questions you or our friends have.
Quendi