Elderess, I will say don't tell them, or don't give them to much info, just say you don't want to talk about it, something happened & you & hubby need some time. The reason I say this is because the longer you are away from the borg the cooler they (kid's) become towards you. Mine hardly phone if they do especially the oldest there is little she has to say to me, however at least for the mo I can have contact & talk about past things we did as a family, reminders if you like that are positive & tell them that I love them. I'm just bidding time I know, but maybe something will stay with them.At the end of the day you have to do what is best for you.
Posts by Sabin
-
92Only a few days ago I was entirely lost and without hope the rug was pulled out from under me
by elderess inonly a few days ago i was walking around the house in a mindless wander thinking if i needed to seek professional help.
then i got the courage to seek the comfort of complete strangers on the internet and found a world of support here on this website.
thank you simon and whoever else has made this website possible.
-
-
-
19
Evaluating the problem of sexual abuse of children within the JW religion, why, how and for what reason
by Finkelstein inthis topic has come up many times before on this forum and others but i think its worthy to reevaluate where and how this problem exists from an analytical perspective within the jw religion.
it is obvious that the wts has been covering up situations of child sexual abuse with careless irresponsible apathy for decades toward both possible victims and potentially identified perpetrators of this socially repugnant crime.
following guidelines as written in the bible which were emulated and exploited as a self protecting guideline to protect the outward image of the organization overall in spite of known acknowledgement that pedophilia is a serious crime in most countries.
-
-
-
34
Fade Fail: Not as Easy as I'd Like
by Hadriel inthis has been tough.
very tough actually.
because i'm so integrated into things including certain tasks which i can't say as it would be a dead giveaway i find myself constantly bombarded by things.. i'm literally a lying every day.
-
-
Sabin
Hadriel have read the book by Bonnie Zieman, Exiting the JW Cult?. well worth taking a look at. Helped me tremendously & many others on the forum. -
19
Evaluating the problem of sexual abuse of children within the JW religion, why, how and for what reason
by Finkelstein inthis topic has come up many times before on this forum and others but i think its worthy to reevaluate where and how this problem exists from an analytical perspective within the jw religion.
it is obvious that the wts has been covering up situations of child sexual abuse with careless irresponsible apathy for decades toward both possible victims and potentially identified perpetrators of this socially repugnant crime.
following guidelines as written in the bible which were emulated and exploited as a self protecting guideline to protect the outward image of the organization overall in spite of known acknowledgement that pedophilia is a serious crime in most countries.
-
-
Sabin
But why are they covering it up? why will they not hand over those names to appropriate authorities? What is it they have to lose by giving them over? that's the bit I cant get my head around. Look the way I see it is that if the governments suddenly asked for all the homosexual (who we know after listening to A Morris comments would be D) they would have no problem handing them over, or what about druggies or adulteries. If you look at every other perceived indiscretion there is no secrecy. I mean everyone knows who screwed who, who smoked a fag, who watched a porn sooner or later everyone knows but not child molesting WHY? WHY? WHY?. They are hiding something else here. One of three possibilities 1) They just are so f...king righteous that they don't believe they have to answer to anyone, not even Jesus as far as I see, & they can say say how the governments are turning on us, the end is nigh. 2) The list is made up mostly of high ranking JWs, or related to high ranking jw's, cause if it was made up of the so called spiritually weak they would gladly throw them in the pit. or 3) They are part of a world wide Pedo ring. Seriously there is something being missed, something lying under the surface that is more sinister than we know. How can there not be. -
55
How many of you are health nuts?
by Harvard Illiterate 411 inthere was/is a sister in my old hall who was a pharmaceutical sales rep and she was a huge proponent of anything in the drug industry.
when someone had a headache, she was the first to say "take an asprin.
" now my husband and i are what you might call old hippies.
-
-
Sabin
Xanthippe & Diogenesister, I am a big advocate of apple cider vinegar. Needs to be organic & contain the mother. For arthritis, 450g/1lb fresh or frozen cherries, stoned (pitted), 600ml/1 pint of apple cider vinegar. Puree together in a blender transfer to bottle store in fridge, 10ml/2 tsp in a glass top up with water. I love anything to do with bee's aswell so if your not allergic then Royal Jelly may work wonders for you. Do your research though & never buy from a super market. Propolis is another bee product & natures premier antioxidant, along with bee pollen & honey as long as it's raw, again don't buy from a super market.
Other than that I have to say I saw a significant change to my overall health both mentally & physically within 6 months of being away from jdubbs & waking up to the fact that it's a CULT.
-
38
Pairing!!!!!
by brandnew indangit.......like i gotta cook for this hot chick tonight, ........i rented a suite at the mayaguez beach hotel, and she's totally into me.
i have my jeep....im still sore from my wreck....but dangit...im into this girl and i need y'alls help.
im californian....kinda been in the tropic forrest..bout 2years....and need some southern help.
-
-
Sabin
It all depends on the girl, why don't you ask her what meat she likes, maybe she's veggie. What ever keep it simple, be yourself, be honest that is more important than food & flowers. DONT try to shag her on the first date. She'll know immediately that your not a man to trust. That's my advice, of course I been out of the dating game for decades now so I suppose I sound a bit old fashioned. Good Luck. -
40
Closer/death/Funerals
by Leela1 inhello all i am fairly new to this site even though i have been da since i was 16 years old i am now 35 years old.
i have had very little contact with my family since i left maybe a handful of times over the years.
i thought i put the past behind me and moved on i have 4 amazing kids of my own really supportive partner and great friends who have become my family.
-
-
Sabin
Hello Leela, my opinion is that you have changed because you chose to, your father has stayed the same because he chose to. No matter what you do now my guess is that his perception of things will not change. All the hurt that you have already been through will be brought back up & you may find yourself back emotionally as that 16yr old girl. That little girl you carry inside that is who should be worrying & looking out for, she is the one that needs you. Be there for her. You have nothing to feel guilty about, that is part of the reason your asking right? I know that feeling, how they love to say it's your fault, you made us do it, how you think that it is the right thing to do so if you don't go through with it you will feel like a bad person all over again. It isn't true, you are not a bad person, your father is a bad father. Isn't that the truth Leela, you are not accountable for your father or his choices. You are accountable for protecting your own inner child. Yes you may forgive your father but can will never forget. I think if you sit down & ask the 16yr old girl inside wether she wants you to go back she will tell you.
Whatever you decide to do Leela, do it for you. You owe no explanation to anybody else, especially not him.
Please don't leave this forum, you will find support/laughs/experiences/advise & the occasional argument here, you will also find big hearts & Big Hugs. SABIN.
-
37
am i overreacting?
by freeandcontent inhi, new here but have been lurking for a while.
some background first, i am from the uk, 3rd gen born in, dad, grandad elders etc.
17 years ago i left, no df or da just left, 18 years old and alone but i did it and have had no regrets.
-
-
Sabin
Outlaw, funny, a wee bit insensitive.
F&C if you had the chat see how it goes from there. However, keep in mind what OutLaw has said.
-
25
umbertoecho re the ARC
by umbertoecho inhello to everyone.. i hope you are all well and sorting things out between yourselves.
i have temporary internet access which is probably a good thing for now.
i have been contacted by the arc in a respectful and loving manner today.
-
-
Sabin
Big Hug & even bigger hug for you. You should be proud of yourself, I am proud of you. WE are ALL proud of you.
-
34
Fade Fail: Not as Easy as I'd Like
by Hadriel inthis has been tough.
very tough actually.
because i'm so integrated into things including certain tasks which i can't say as it would be a dead giveaway i find myself constantly bombarded by things.. i'm literally a lying every day.
-
-
Sabin
"It make's want to be evil back at times."
You couldn't have worded it better, they push & push & push until in the end you are left with no choice but to be rude in order to protect yourself. Then they turn it around on you. Hang on in there I bet your doing a lot better than you think.
The Bastards.