Posts by the

43

DRY BEGGING....

by Snoozy in

i just learned about this yesterday..i was amazed!.

i have a grown daughter that is a expert at this... .

dry begging:to ask for in an indirect and roundabout way.

Well, when my in-laws (whom I live with) make carne asada on the weekends, when the crazy weather allows, the little kids on our block like to swing around and literally swing in our fence while licking their lips and complementing the aromas. SO we always give them food. But just cuz they're cute :D.

When we had cookouts or picnics with the Kingdom Hall during the summer, my mom would always have to buy and prepare twice as much as her family would consume. Why? Well, lucky for her she's a really good cook, so all the brothers and sisters would dry beg for them sausages or ribs. Damn those ribs were good... and since she was the only who knew how to actually make ribs, yeah, my dad would often be fuming when he realized there were none left for him. Once, I had a cute boy flirt with me... just for me to find out he was lusting after my mother's weenies.

They were also creative. Yup. Dry begging, how I miss thee...

40

craziest reason elders wanted to have a commitee meeting with you

by glentrevette in

i had a sister who was a tenant in my house and her car was leaking oil all over my newly paved driveway before she moved in i had a condition on the lease that said if her car leaked oil she couldnt park there and i told here after she moved in that she was being deceptive to me when she said her car didnt leak oil she was good friends with a lot of powerful elders in the hall and would you believe they asked to meet with me 3 elders in the back room of the library because they said i had called this sister a liar i got out of it only after i produced a copy of the lease and pictures of the oil mess if i hadnt of had pictures maybe i would of been dfd.

the_raisin

The craziest reason was because I asked them too. I was a publisher and on the road to become a baptized little sister, but had had enough so I started seeing a worldly older boy and asked my parents to set up the meeting because I was no longer going to preach or pretend I was something I was not.

They agreed. But only because they were shocked. They had, for years, threatened their kids with two options: either keep pretending you're good and preach and receive book studies or talk to the Elders yourselves, because we sure ain't going to do it for you. They were that scared of the Elders.

52

what was the worst meeting you ever attended ?

by man in black in

here's mine :.

back in the early 90's we went to the sunday talk and wt study.. lo and behold, a friend from the 70's who was df'ed ( he had just been reinstated) was there along with his parents.

i had no idea that they would have been there.. one of my kids was getting sick, so my wife and i were up-down the entire meeting walking him around.

the_raisin

One of the worst, and the one that made me openly cry in silence, was one of those speeches that are supposed to be about bringing to light the needs of the congregation. That specific one was about homosexuals. The speaker was one of the most intolerant bigots I have ever heard ramble. I was shaken and convinced no matter what I was never going to be loved by God or my family and was going to make my mom very sad for not being resurrected if I died. I was around fourteen. And I was very confused. That speech set me back two years for me to admit who I truly am.

29

What drove you? Love or Fear?

by fade_away in

this has probably been discussed here before, but i'm new so sue me.. i think the religion of jehovah's witnesses has been an amazing but tragic social experiment proving that the mind is most vulnerable to brainwashing when it's in an unhealthy state.

it seems to attract the bipolar, schizophrenic, depressive, and the paranoid.

it preys on negative emotions like sorrow and fear.

the_raisin

It was more curiosity. Because the conversations always led to a 'whole new world' that was rid of disease after Armageddon, and complete with a matching set of cuddly lion cubs and whales to ride, I was driven by my mere curiosity of finding out how it would work out. Especifically, how in the world were we supposed to clean our planet, where were we going to live, who was going to resurrect (that witchy old lady? or the cranky old brother?), and to me more importantly, the secrets of the universe. I was also hoping I'd get told a couple of things, like who really killed Kennedy, and if there are aliens.

:p

16

Did you fake a prayer at the dinner table?

by fade_away in

i was terrible at prayers.

it was hard for me to talk to someone i can't see or hear.

everyone else put their heads down at the dinner table so i needed to do the same or i'll look suspicious.

the_raisin

I'm a girl, so I was never asked to pray outloud, but when we were at restaurants and they would bow their head down and close their eyes, I just looked around, and shook my head :p.

And when my mom would force me to do a silent pray, I'd just silently think of the most offensive thing I could think of. I was just never meant to be a good little lamb :p

Good stories though.

62

The classic features of a JW wedding are:

by highdose in

firstly a wedding/sales talk that mostly features heavily on how the woman should behave (hint, doormat) and lightly brushes over the fact of the husbands bevhaviour ( oh yeah he should treat her well).

the reception normaly at some crummy comunity hall with yellowed ceilings and chucks of damp plaster falling off the walls.

the seats normaly arranged facing eachother all around the edge, so that theres a huge unused space in the middle and everyone is climbing over everyone elses legs to get to their chair.. a big spread donated by everyone, normaly an ode to food poisoning.

the_raisin

I only went to one wedding (my parents' at our house) and a couple of receptions(all held in the same place).

My parents were lucky in that neither were baptized, but an elder married them. And it was held on our front yard :D I mean, it was a pretty big yard, three big tents with tables and chairs. We had music, courtesy of our wanna-be DJ brothers. We had ambience (our family dog roaming around during the ceremony and plopping himself down right next to my parents for the last fifteen minutes of it. I have proof. Best goof ever! And everybody was so mortified with the dog doing this, nobody bothered moving him :D). But there was no place for dacing, since it was grass and mud and yeah, heels don't go well with it, and our deck was decked with food and a huge homemade cake my poor mom had to bake that very morning. Details are fuzzy (kinda tipsy. My parents forgot my high school graduation was THAT same day, so I retaliated in the dumbest way possible), but yeah, it was pretty nice, pretty chill, and I had the cutest dress :D.

The receptions in the hall were a joke. Lame music, blinding white lights, no decorations at all, and a terrible attempt to hide a gigantic United States Flag on the front wall. Ooooh and when the two or three brothers or sisters who fancied themselves 'artistes' and would sing their renditions of the most popular Latin pop song of the moment? Yeah, we videotaped those. And the plays. The plays! The little ones would put on plays based on the Bible, and the acting and wardrobe malfunctions were pure gold. Thankfully, I wasn't good enough for those plays.

Oooh, I want to add something else: the fact that these weddings were evil in the way that for the teenagers, it also was a way to show who was the best catch. Whoever was on the dance floor dancing with the most opposite sex partners (we were allowed!) was obviously the most pious one. I think I got asked a grand total of three times. In all five years.

76

What was your most embarassing WTF experience with a fanatical witness??

by Reality79 in

we've all known those fanatical witnesses who are guilty of pdf (public display of faith) and always have to make a big song and dance to the whole world and let everyone and their dog know they're a faithful witness of jay hoover!.

1) when my mother first came in 'da troooof' this wacky, over zealous 'sister' was studying with her - you know the type.

this woman was one of those not so subtle individuals who would always talk loud in conversation and say the name jehovah a million times even when the conversation could have been about basketball.

the_raisin

Heh. So my mom was an overzealous JW, and this one time, when I was around 15 and she 33 (she had me REAL young), we decide it would be a good idea to go door to door together. Every time the door opened to a man, I cursed silently my luck, because most of the time, they would always hit on my mom, not realizing of course she was a mom in the first place. It was so blatant as well, so darn obvious, but when I cornered my mom and asked her why she allowed it to continue, she would always reply something along the lines of Jehovah giving her this advantage over others to be able to preach his word, and maybe it was a good thing because look, she had been able to place magazines to all these pervy men! She had done her job and was quite possibly changing a life!

Oh yeah. What a blessing.

12

why are witnesses so ridiculous????

by mochamint22 in

so it's been a while since i've posted on the site to hello everyone.

i just am so irritated by these fools that i have to tell you guys about this.

so my husband was on his way to the store and he stopped to pump gas and there were some witnesses doing street witnessing and this brother gets out and comes up to him (i was at home, this is my hubby telling me about this) this happens to be the po of the spanish hall my mother goes to.

the_raisin

My mom did this during her work hours. She's a hairstylist, so I guess it's not a professional setting but still. Sometimes I would go leave her lunch or just keep her some company, and I'd be mortified when she would pounce on an unsuspecting victim, who was clearly uncomfortable, but there's not much to do while your hair is lathered with tons of shampoo and there is a grinning glass-eyed lady hovering above you with a hose full of hot water.

The worst is when the customer would actually argue back with logic, and poor mom had this fazed look on her face, yet kept trying to argue with 'Jehovah is all and the only God and the end is near and it's all in the bible so it must be true'.

Awkward.

6

Kids doing the dirty work...

by MrFreeze in

a lot of times i noticed that jw's would have their little ones hold the magazines while out at the door.

i guess they figured it would make the householder more likely to take the trash.. well my parents tried to pull the same thing on me.

only with the memorial.

the_raisin

Whoa. Yeah, it's unsettling. My old congregation would praise the little ones who were making Pioneer hours (I'm serious, there were two families that did this with their nine year old and six year old kids during the summer). They would also get them to speak about their experinces up in the platform during the experiences segments. I always rolled my eyes, because the stuff these children spewed out was so rehearsed and fake-sounding.

Once, after the meeting, I was talking to one of the little ones, and the whole discussion revolved around toy guns and Pokemon. He didn't mention Jehovah or all the good stuff that happened during service as they made him claim up there. I even asked. He just shrugged :p Cute kid actually, at the time. He's now around ten and from what I hear, quite rebellious.

9

The tables have turned

by fade_away in

i remember when i was the one on the doorstep knocking on a house full of different noises when suddenly the house goes into a dead silence and the curtains move a bit.

we always whispered to each other "i know they're home, i heard them" and "let's see if they answer the door to jehovah on his day of wrekoning".....which makes no sense, but whatever.. today early in the afternoon my wife and i found ourselves on the other side of the door when we heard a knock from jws we know.

i paused the movie we were watching and made my way to the peep hole.

the_raisin

I get this :/ Since in LA, I've been tempted to just flat out say that I'm an apostate. Dunno how they'd react, and I don't want to make anyone feel bad, being around an evil entity such as msyelf an all :o

the_raisin

Posts by the_raisin