i know this and i've known this for a pretty long time.. sorry to youse who want to receive a different message than what i offer.
you will get what you want from those who give you what you want.
i have no problem with that.. there is a place for me to play.
Farkdude,
I like your posts, but I think when you start posting crap like this AGAIN what you really need to do is take a long break from things JW and ex-JW related. Maybe permanently. You post indicates that being heavily involved in your anti-JW crusade is not effective *for you* and not making you happy. Get a life outside the whole JW/ex-JW mess. Piss off now and don't come back. I'm sure I'll be joining you down the line.
i' so tired of this.
sometime, i'd just like to say goodbye cruel world but, it would be too easy to do this.
when i was in the borg, they were telling me that when someone go out of the org, he have a lot of problems and that's exactly what happen to me.
I definitely can relate to your post, although I wish I didn't.
Being raised by an extreme fanatical JW mother, who rabidly followed every suggestion of the Watchtower as the literal word of Jehovah himself, I can say that this really warped my sense of self and the world around me. When I think back on some of the stupid beliefs I was still carrying around a few short years ago, I still shake my head in disbelief. Even the JWs thought my mother was too extreme.
You can guess correctly what that did to me.
After leaving, I knew the JWs were a cult, weren't God's chosen organization, but that didn't mean I was ready to join the human race outside of "Shawshank Prison." I was, like the movie aptly says, "an institutional man." A few times I considered going back just to get that feeling of being normal again.
Nick, it's going to take time. Most certainly a lot of time. You're going to have to rebuild your life, and the sooner you get to working on this, the better. Are there ex-JW's in the area where you live? If there are JWs, for sure there are ex's. This would be a good place to start building some relationships if you have that "fish out of water" feeling where the feeling of not fitting in anywhere dominates you. From there you will learn to take some chances and integrate yourself socially again with people.
Feel free to email me anytime. I had a terrible social phobia that made me miserable for quite some time. I could give you some suggestions that worked for me and will point you hopefully in a
healing direction.
i was just wondering if you have a movie or some movies that have given you the creeps.
did you see it as a jw or after?
do you watch " demonized " movies now?
I laughed myself silly through the "The Shining." Every time Jack would flash those pearly whites and grin, I cracked up. There are some horrific scenes in that movie, the dead twin girls, the blood pouring out of the elevators, but beyond that it struck me as almost a comedy.
"The Exorcist" creeped me out, because my mother was obsessed with demons when I was growing up and passed that on to me. "Seven" had me totally riveted to the very end. Great atmosphere in that film.
"Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer" creeped me out bad enough to buy a home alarm system. "Requiem for a Dream: The Director's Cut" was not specifically a horror movie, but a stark, realistic view of how drugs can destroy your life. It creeped me out bad enough that as brilliant as that film is, I don't want to see it again.
at least denzel washington came forth to say that his role in "training day" was a character to which he immensely hated portraying, and it was very difficult for him to act out the role of a villian in a character he just loathed to the core.
halle berry on the other hand, as shown by her response is extremely over joyful for the winning of best actress in "monsters ball".
" the 33-year-old actress, a former beauty queen, glamerized herself for her role in "monsters ball" as a dispirited waitress and mother who falls in love with a white prison guard who she doesn't know has helped put her husband in the electric chair.".
Spart,
I can't describe how painfully amateur it is. It turns into a statement on black pride, which in my opinion contradicted the spiritual rebirth that Malcolm X experienced. Spike Lee is definitely the kind of director who let's his politics get in the way of good film making.
at least denzel washington came forth to say that his role in "training day" was a character to which he immensely hated portraying, and it was very difficult for him to act out the role of a villian in a character he just loathed to the core.
halle berry on the other hand, as shown by her response is extremely over joyful for the winning of best actress in "monsters ball".
" the 33-year-old actress, a former beauty queen, glamerized herself for her role in "monsters ball" as a dispirited waitress and mother who falls in love with a white prison guard who she doesn't know has helped put her husband in the electric chair.".
Kevin Spacey's Oscar for his performance in "American Beauty" was well deserved. I do believe Denzel Washington deserved an Oscar for "Malcolm X" but sadly Spike Lee screwed up Denzel's chances of seriously being considered by the ludicrious, stupid, flakey ending he tacked onto it. ("I'm Malcom X!" So corny I was embarassed for the actors repeating this drivel) Anyone who has been through the JW experience will appreciate the story of Malcolm X which is so similar in many ways. Except he was murdered for his "apostacy" from the Nation of Islam.
someone replied to a post i entered and got me thinking what others perceive about us due to the nicks or id we have chosen.
some of the nicks i am sure are just self explanatory , others are cute, or simple.
although i suspect that very many in this room,took time to think of theirs and definitly the nick holds some little secret as to who they are as a person.
When I began posting on this board I had two really good friends, Ben and Jerry, that I was seeing on frequent basis. Hey, keep your grass, cocaine, wine, beer. My way to relax was with a frozen pint of those godly ice cream concoctions like New York Super Chunk, Concession Obsession, Heath Bar Crunch, Cherries Garcia, or Phish Food. I was closing in on 300 pounds when I signed onto the board. Therefore, I was truly a mega dude. Not that big anymore. Thinking of changing my name to The Poster Formerly Known as Megadude.
i've been out of the jws for some time now, seven years.
like many of you, i left a lot of acquaintances, friends, and family behind.. the acquaintances were fairly easy to let go, the friends very hard, and the family, well, near impossible, at least up until now.
that she should listen to both sides of the story without fear and make her own decision.
Jst2laws,
You asked for an update on my mother. No change, nor do I anticipate one. She's a true believer. Although she lives about 10 minutes from me, she never calls, nor does she stop by.
Any sort of deep emotional connection I used to feel towards her is fading more away each day. I should say I'm not giving up, but like others have stated, I got tired of the emotional upset that never seemed to heal from reaching out for years and getting nothing back in return. Since I made a decision and a firm commitment to divorce these people out of my life and not reach out anymore, I feel better. It was very hard, but it was the best decision *for me.*
The hardest one to let go of, as I've said before, was my brother.
But when I ran into him a couple of weeks ago, I didn't feel the same as I did before. It used to agitate me to no end and cause me a lot of grief, but that seems to be gone as I stated in my follow-up post "Letting JW relatives go revisited." Wish I had done this a long time ago.
I have wondered what the hell I was thinking putting myself through that year after year. I guess I wanted to believe, despite the overwhelming contrary evidence, that if I kept trying we could be a family again. It was a beautiful wish, and I certainly gave it my best effort, but I've had quite enough of their cold shoulder to last me a lifetime.
I saw my oldest ex-JW sister this weekend, and she made the same decision I did. She says when she occasionally runs into our mom (visiting our dad who was never a JW) it's like seeing a familiar acquaintance, but certainly there is no relationship or family feelings anymore. She doesn't feel her mother is her mom and is happier thinking of her that way. Your "family" isn't necessarily your family after leaving the Watchtower. I think it's healthier to think of it that way.
:::::there has never been a better time to leave jehovah's witnesses and make a. good recovery.. megadude just wrote this under the thread of *down and out exjws*.
his post was, dare i say - very uplifting?.
we should run this catch-phrase somewhere prominent.
Hi Marilyn,
My oldest sister Angie was the trailblazer in our family. She left the JWs first, and we, her family, shunned her for doing that. She moved away to college and never looked back. She had never heard of Crises of Conscience, Ray Franz or anybody else. There was no internet at the time. She just knew there was something wrong with the Watchtower and left. Years went by. She graduated from college. None of her family (mother, brothers, sisters) except for our father (never a Dub) went to see her graduate. She married. Again, we shunned her and her new husband and didn't go to her wedding. Her children were born, and again we ignored her and her new family. Years and years went by. I went on with my happy little JW life until a friend at work began helping me out of the Watchtower. What a surprise years later when I knocked on my sister's door to say, "I'm sorry. I had no idea I was in a cult, I'm sorry I shunned you, I'm out of the JWs," and began to see if we could be family again.
I'm happy to say today Angie has two masters degrees, two fine children, and a great husband, a house by the lake, and she is doing very well in her career. She's active in civic organizations and is one of the most generous people I know. It was so hard for her to leave because she had no ex-JWs or ex-JW books to confirm what she felt in her gut. She had to go it pretty much alone. But it just goes to show you, if you get on with your life and accept those necessary losses, and do what's best for you, you have a much better chance at having a good life. And that's the best revenge you can have on the Watchtower.
i've been out of the jws for some time now, seven years.
like many of you, i left a lot of acquaintances, friends, and family behind.. the acquaintances were fairly easy to let go, the friends very hard, and the family, well, near impossible, at least up until now.
that she should listen to both sides of the story without fear and make her own decision.
parsnips,
you email me at [email protected]
a large proportion of the ex jws i know and stay in contact with are pretty much down and out.. i stay in contact with 4 from my past.. out of the 4:.
3 of them are long term unemployed.. 3 of those have psychiatric problems.. 2 of them dont have a stable relationship.. only 1 of them is a reasonable financial success.. my perception of the ex dub world is one of destroyed lives and, too a large degree, hopelessness.i base this perception on those ex dubs i know.
course, they are all hard core apostates.
I was "screwed" in the head when I came out of the JWs a few years ago. That's fairly NORMAL, if you've heard anyone's story. The quicker you get on with your life though, the faster you're going to heal. One of my sisters in her late thirties has started going to college, in addition to working fulltime as an executive at her job, and raising her 14 year old son. She's working hard, kicking ass, and doing very well. So is my other sister who made the difficult transition out of the JWs and finished college. She's doing very well also.
I was fortunate that I bucked the system as a Dub and got at least a trade school education. At least I'm not stripping and waxing floors at night like my former JW brethren. Two of sisters left with me, so I've had their support and friendship despite losing other family, a marriage and many friends. I am also lucky that I live in Dallas/Ft. Worth, which rivals Florida for being the apostate capital of the United States, so I have some great ex JW pals.
It took a long time to feel good again, but I did. With all the support out there, locally and online, there has never been a better time to leave Jehovah's Witnesses and make a good recovery.
