OMG Terry, such a sad consequence when 1975 happened. You write so eloquently. To endure so much, then brace yourself for what comes next, or what you believed to come. My oh my!
I was married in 1975, and lived amongst jw's. My hubbie and I grew up knowing 1975 and had many debates about their prophecy. We felt under great pressure to commit; so just backed away. Fast forward to 1983/84 and I began a serious study. The regular pioneer I asked about the 1975 debacle was openley honest in her talks with me. I shelved under "leave it for Jehovah to sort out ". When I moved to another part of the UK it was verboten to speak of this. And as time went by c/o' s and elders acted like it was rogue overseers' who fomented this teaching.
My " leave it Jehovah file" grew to fat and burst. And I had a WTF moment!