@MrDarkKnight I feel you. Labels can build a wall especially if applied without proof to backup the claim.They misuse the term apostate. Scripturally I am not an apostate. They take the scriptures out of context to mean being against them.
I use the term cult because they fit the description by a cult expert. I came to view them as a cult while reading Hassan's book. I wanted out of the religion before this but I kept askig what if I'm wrong. Reading Hassan's book helped break the mental grip cults have on followers. To see their way of doing things is not special or from God released me. That is why so many suggest this book. It's like pulling the curtain on the Wizard of oz. This allowed me to truly love myself.
some excerpts
Pg 45 para.4 In some cults, members are systematically made to be phobic about ever leaving the group. Today's cults know how to effectively implant vivid negative images deep within members' unconscious minds, making it impossible for the member to even conceive of ever being happy and successful outside of the group. When the unconscious is programmed to accept the negative images, it behaves as though they were true. The unconscious mind is made to contain a substantial image-bank of all of the bad things that will occur if anyone should ever betray the group.
Pg 79 para 2 Since mind control depends on creating a new identity within the individual, cult doctrine always requires that a person distrust his own self. The doctrine becomes the "master program" for all thoughts, feelings, and actions. Since it is the TRUTH, perfect and absolute, any flaw in it is viewed as only a reflection of the believer's own imperfection. He is taught that he must follow the prescribed formula even if he doesn't really understand it. At the same time he is told that he should try to work harder and have more faith so he will come to understand the truth more clearly.
Pg 82 para.2,3 The cult member comes to live within a narrow corridor of fear, guilt, and shame. Problems are always the fault of the member, and are due to his weak faith, his lack of understanding, "bad ancestors," evil spirits, and so forth. He perpetually feels guilty for not meeting standards. He comes to believe that "evil" is out to get him. In every destructive cult I have encountered, fear is a major motivator. Each group has its devil lurking around the corner waiting for members to tempt and seduce, to kill or to drive insane. The more vivid and tangible a devil the group can conjure up, the more intense is the cohesiveness it fosters.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YWyCCJ6B2WE&feature=related