For me, it was when I agreed to go to a JC meeting. The way I was treated, the way they twisted things to make be look bad when I had done nothing except get away made me angry. I did not express my rage, and played it cool. Somehow they got the impression that I wanted to come back. Maybe it was because I didn't yell or show my rage.
I realized how lucky I was to live in a time and place where it was illegal to burn me at the stake because I got the impression that they would have loved to do just that!
I left that meeting a free woman! Immediately afterward, I went and found a friend (another ex-JW) to celebrate! This was in 1979.