Posts by myMichelle

23

Like a moth to a flame

by Esmeralda in

jw
friends

hi everyone.... what is it about this place?

what is it that keeps drawing me back when i have.

all these plans to try to just leave the jw issues alone, behind me and think.

myMichelle

Hi Es!!

Good to see you, hope that's a sign of things getting better.

I know whatcha mean. I am continually drawn to the board. I pop in a couple times a day during breaks, etc. I don't really post a whole lot (as one can see by the number of my posts), but I like to see what's going on with everyone. Kinda how I am in the non-cyber world too, I love to sit back and watch the people around me.

My original motivation for coming to the internet is now gone, my family is safe, relatively safe anyways. It remains to be seen how my in-laws are going to react to my husband's changing views, getting mixed signals on that. I suppose it will remain that way until if/when "official" action is taken. Kinda feels like I'm in a holding pattern, but I'll cheerfully take this situation over last year's.

What keeps me coming back now are the people I have met here. Several of you have really helped me through the last couple of years, thanks.

Must not be ready to say good-bye, or I'm just like a chocoholic drawn to the freezer to snack on the cache of Thin Mints. (A less painful comparision than burning a moth up in a flame )

Glad to see you up and about,
{{hugs}}
Michelle

13

Taking time to smell the roses...

by Esmeralda in

jw
friends

i got a great gift today from someone at h2o.

it was a post.

in response to my "emotional bankruptcy" thread that i. posted here, and there as well.. it's a gift because it was just the kick in the ass that i needed.. the perfect reminder of why i am not only happy, but relieved.

myMichelle

The cold-hearted, arrogant, wouldn't-know-an-honest-emotion-if-it-bit-him-on-the-backside jerk. Well, at least you took his pitiful excuse for emotional abuse and used it for something productive. Makes me all the more thankful I was never involved in this organization and all the more resolved to insure that my children will never be.

Rest up, gain strength, and I hope to "see" you soon.
Lotsa hugs,
Michelle

The most deadly of all sins is the mutilation of a child's spirit. -Erik H. Erikson

33

The difference between a JW and an IDIOT

by Focus in

jw
friends

.

myMichelle

Hey, thanks TR, I appreciate your response.

Michelle

33

The difference between a JW and an IDIOT

by Focus in

jw
friends

.

myMichelle

Not all idiots are JWs.

In addition, I don't believe all JWs are idiots.

TR,
you said

A bigger idiot is 'Stillanidiot', for claiming to do research and STILL joining.

My hubby did just that. He was raised in the org, but left as a teenager (before being baptised). Later, after marriage and two kids, he returned to the Organization. He went to the Freeminds site, to Shaun's site, and he read the letter at the following site just a few weeks before getting baptized. http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Creek/8867/Letter5web.html

I showed him these sites. I showed him quotes right out of the Organization's own literature. I asked questions and even pleaded with him and it was all dismissed out of hand. I will never understand that. I try to, but as of today he has not been able to successfully explain why he did what he did. I just don't understand how I could be the perfect person for him to marry, to raise kids with, to handle the household finances, to make other decisions with, but somehow I was too biased, silly, emotional and just had no idea what I was talking about when it came to the WTS.

Despite vehemently disagreeing with his decision to seal his commitment to the WTS by getting dunked, I have never considered him an idiot. (A jerk at times , but that is a whole other thread.) I have always considered him to be a highly intelligent, analytical person--he just made a poor choice in his religion of preference.

When I became an idiot, my wife didn't become an idiot. I was an idiot for ten years while my wife patiently waited for me to quit being an idiot.

I have read where you make similar comments before. I have a lot of questions about that, being in a similar situation (husband the JW, the wife not). I have the nonJW spouse perspective and have heard from other nonJW spouses, but I would really like to hear about this situation from the JW spouse's perspective.

Did your wife ask you questions, disagree with you joining the WTS? How did you view this if she did? What did you say to her when you decided to leave? Do you have other family in the Org? Etc, etc, etc.

My hubby is becoming more and more inactive, but it will probably be many years, if ever, before we will ever be able to discuss the whole subject without a flare-up in tempers. If you could offer some insight into this type of situation, I would appreciate it. That is if you don't mind, and if this db is too public, my email is available.

Thanks, that's it for now.
Michelle

14

Emotional Bankruptcy after the Tower

by Esmeralda in

jw
friends

"in many ways, poverty is a state of mind.

emma bromon, ~founder of liberty house, a halfway house in new orleans for homeless girls with children, or who are pregnant.. this quote inspired me tonight, on an evening where i certainly needed to feel inspired by something.

it made me question the way that i feel sometimes, that sickening out of control emotion that keeps me awake some nights.. nights like last night.. the feeling that carries over into days like today, .

myMichelle

I will live richly, because I stubbornly insist that beneath my pain, is the capacity to give love,
and receive it.

Good, keep insisting it--and believe it. I see proof of that in each and every one of your posts.

Here's hoping today will be a better day for you.

Michelle

33

Celebrate with me today

by Esmeralda in

jw
friends

today, april 20th, is the fourth anniversary of a very special day in my life.. the anniversary of my rebirth.. this rebirth was not a religious experience, but it was something totally pure, amazing and healing.. it had nothing at all to do with the society, or rather, of freeing myself from it.

it was however, a giant first step in that direction.. today is the fourth anniversary of the day i got letter that changed everything.

the words on the pages were alive, and magical: they released me from my old life and for the first time.

myMichelle

Absolutely beautiful, Es, you have a wonderful gift of imagery. I'm so happy you and Justin found each other. Thank goodness for that special day, I know I'm all the richer having had the chance to meet you.

Hugs to you, Justin, and Es Jr. (can't remember her online alias).

Michelle

Edited to change color, my first choice--ewwww...

6

Need A Laugh? 5/15/01 WT

by myMichelle in

i resisted posting this on the "main" page, trying to comply with the division of posts that simon is encouraging.

(no thanks necessary, simon, just following the rules.).

well, i finished my dinner a little while ago and whilst i was tidying up the kitchen, i noticed that i had received my 5/15/01 issue of the wt.

myMichelle

I resisted posting this on the "Main" page, trying to comply with the division of posts that Simon is encouraging. (No thanks necessary, Simon, just following the rules.)

Well, I finished my dinner a little while ago and whilst I was tidying up the kitchen, I noticed that I had received my 5/15/01 issue of the WT. (A subscription started by an anonymous benefactor, don't you know.)

Anyhoo, I pull off the wrapper to file it dutifully away, when I erroneously glanced at the back cover. In great big words it proclaims "Thank Jehovah's Witnesses for Religious Freedom". I hoped none of you choked as I did, I did warn you in the title of the post that this is funny.

Before any local apologists start to try to explain what the authors "meant", let's just all reflect on the irony of this little statement. Let's reflect upon exactly how much freedom of religion the WTS offers its members.

Well, that's all for now,
Michelle

26

uh oh

by Esmeralda in

jw
friends

...my husband just got laid off, again.

the big job the company had been promised fell through.. this is the second time in three months, but this time they said that the company will most likely.

fold within weeks.

myMichelle

Oh Es,

Confound it all!! Sending supportive thoughts your way, and Jack's too. :)

Don't have any lean time stories, although one Friday my husband was told to clean out his desk that they had eliminated his job position. No warning, although it wasn't totally unexpected, the rumor mill was churning, but that isn't always reliable.

Two weeks later, he was working again, in a infinitely better atmosphere, in a field that he enjoyed much, much more. I'm rooting for an ending like that for you too.

Hugs to ya,
Michelle

16

Yoga-gate 2001

by Esmeralda in

jw
friends

good greif.

my jw relatives really, really need to get a hobby of some kind to keep them.

busy.. my sister claire stopped by today (with a hilarious story of a comedy of errors and how all.

myMichelle

Hi Es,

If I'm happy, I must be doing something wrong, right? *lol*

Clearly, you are in league with Lucifer! I bet if we threw you in water (a la Salem witch trial) that you would swim instead of sinking and drowning like one of God's innocent lambs.

sit around in our livingroom and watch Star Trek, the Next Generation

Another sign of your fallen state, an obsession with alien characters endorsing other belief structures. Woe befall you when we consider that awful Vulcan race with their pointy ears.

LOL! Tell them not only do you do yoga, but you burn incense while doing it and that you do yoga in the nude. See if you pop any blood vessels. Nosey people.

Michelle

14

JW attitudes on women - why beneficial

by tergiversator in

my secret wish, when i was about 10 years old and we were going through the revelation book for the second time, was that one day we would show up at the book study and all the baptized brothers would be missing and they would let me read.

i was pretty sure that i wouldn't mangle words like thyatira and laodicea nearly as badly as some of the poor brothers they roped into reading at times, who looked like they were being tortured during particularly difficult lessons.. i liked to read, i thought.

my older brother got to read a lot, even when he wasn't baptized.

myMichelle

-Tergiversator, of the When Do I Stop Being a Newbie Class?

20 posts.

Thanks for the post, Tergiversator (whew! that's tricky),

When I first saw it, I was worried, thought I'd have to pop in here and lay some pre-historic concept of women and "their place" to rest, glad to see I was wrong.

Welcome to the board,
Michelle