I think reporting it to the school is enough. He touched your breast but he didn't do any more than that.... (If you said "no" while kind of laughing/being inconsistent with your communication.....or had been flirting (some women flirt so often they don't even realize when they do it)or half-heartedly said no, it could be mis-interpreted)............I think the offence was more of a professional one than a criminal one....and the school committee will put some fear into him......
A lot of people think situations like these are always black and white, but they aren't always. I worked with a girl who flirted a lot, with many guys, blatantly, then she tells me how this guy she only liked as a friend tried to kiss her. And I'm thinking to myself "You flirt a lot and then you wonder why he tries to kiss you? Ummmm, as many signals as you throw out, some guy is BOUND to think you like him..." She flirted a lot. I'm not saying this is true for you, I'm just saying that some women flirt and then wonder why a guy makes a move. Then when a guy does, if he looks like Clarence Thomas he gets sued for sexual harrassment, and if he looks like Denzel Washington or Tom Cruise, he gets laid.
A friend of mine was fired on the job for <gasp!> gently grabbing a lapel pin that was buttoned on a co-worker and reading it. He didn't grab HER. Just the lapel pin. Then he's
being interrogated in an office a few minutes later, fired, and taken out by security. After the fact it turned out that she'd been sexually abused in the past, as a kid and was extremely uncomfortable with ANY kind of casual touch. And that she'd over-reacted based on her past history and not on what my friend had done, which was just to casually grab her lapel to get a closer look. The company later apologized and wanted to rehire him but he declined and told them he had no desire to work for them. Let's just say he was pretty pissed off about the whole ordeal. I'm surprised he didn't file a lawsuit. He should have.
KungFu
JoinedPosts by KungFu
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52
Teacher sexually assulted me...........what do you think
by Jesika inin your opinon......................should i go through with it..................................(hi simon.....long time).
on august 4th of 2008 at approximately 8:00-8:10am i was coming from the front office after receiving a green sheet for being absent on thursday, july 31st 2008. i was passing the women's restroom on my way back to class, when i saw steve walking the barren hallways.
he didn't notice me since i was walking far behind him.
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KungFu
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How to find new friends?
by socialdistortion inhi... my name is chrissy & i have been away from the "truth" for 8 years now.
i married a "brother" when i was 20. i was humiliated by the "elders" in the backroom for oral sex & publicly humiliated but never disfellowshipped.
my husband & i left the truth together after moving away from the area where we lived when we were witnesses.
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KungFu
Here are some ideas:
1) You and your husband can join a salsa or dance class.
2) Take martial arts
3) Find something that interests you (art,music,etc.) and take a class at the local college or community college.
4) Go to some non-Christian churches/temples. Meet up with some Bahais or Buddhists or Universalists. This will help you get over the idea that JWs had such high standards and you'll realize there are complete non-jw strangers that will welcome you and treat you well. I've met with Bahais, Buddhists, went to a mostly black protestant church (I'm white),
a Falun Gong group......just curiosity and experimenting and found that there were a lot of good friendly people. Bahais let me in their home as a guest for coffee and snacks and such, were very friendly. The Buddhists were very friendly. And in the black protestant church, everyone was friendly and welcoming. If you were a JW and met up these people after their meeting, you'd think you were in a Kingdom Hall...the only difference was that the people during the service were more dynamic and emotional in the church.
5) Volunteer locally (JWs talk bad about people who are "worldly"...there are plenty of these so-called worldly people that volunteer their time to helping other people )
6) Just for fun, go watch some local comedy shows.
7) Go to a quiet jazz club (since you seem not to be into bars or clubs). Meet the band members. Find out the places they play at.
8) Hang out with the people you work with. Tell them you're going for a drink or coffee after work and invite them.
9) If you need to brush up on your conversational skills, get the book "The Fine Art of Small Talk" by Debra Fine.
10)Join toastmasters (google it)...it's a public speaking/self-improvement class.
11)Make a list of all the things, big and small, that you enjoy doing and do them. Make a list of things you'd like to try, and do them.
12)Join a gym. Talk to people at the gym. If you click with someone, invite her for a smoothie or something.
13)Rekindle old friendships...call up old friends. Have a night or 2 a week where you call them up. Just for a chat or to make plans.
14)Move to a new area if you dislike where you live. You can pick areas where there's lots of stuff to do.
15)See if there are any groups that like to bike or hike in your area. Google it.
16)Go to meetup.com..........find groups that talk about things you're interested in. If you want to accelerate your social life using meetup, then join several groups and go to all their meetings.
17) GET PEOPLE'S CONTACT INFO. People that you really click with and invite them over for coffee or dinner. Entertain people at your home. -
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How I made a WITNESS break the spell he was under, a least temporarily
by What-A-Coincidence inafter telling him my fam.
and i left, i explained to him about the pedophiles, un etc.. like clockwork ... "the society is imperfect" "new light" bla bla.
i said, 'we are told to repeat those lines, and you my friend have done a great job" ... you should have seen his face ... priceless.
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KungFu
Yeah. There's a difference between progressive understanding of truths and contradiction. Progressive understanding doesn't negate what's already been learned. Kind of like mathmatics. Learning multiplication or division doesn't negate addition and subtraction. It's ADDITIONAL understanding that doesn't contradict itself. "New Light" as they call it is usually nothing but a contradiction of what they said before.....
Just out of curiosity, I've noticed that there are a lot of people that spend lots of time contradicting and debunking JWs...and that's all well and good. Don't become too consumed with it though. What I'm saying is that it's also a good idea to build something new and positive. That has nothing to do with proving anyone wrong but more about creating what you want and things that build people up. Otherwise what will happen, is for those who become too consumed with the negative, you might find yourself in a miserable position. What I mean is that there's so much good and great things in this world. So many possibilities. There's a lot of things to do and be and discover. -
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what happens if I die?
by halcyon inwhat happens to a fader whose family is still jw if they die?
what kind of funeral do they get?
i know nobody shows up, but who presides over it?
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KungFu
Here's what happens:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dgNJhzJeZac -
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How much of a role in Brainwashing did the songs actually play?
by KW13 inthose haunting words...those out of tune dubs...wailing...moanin...then i wake up :p lol i am kidding, but i remember 'snippets' of a lot of songs, all of which focused on me being submissive (for example song number 8, my favourite as a child dub).
does singing help brainwash sheep?
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KungFu
Yeah. That was a weird line "like bees that were molested". I could see a bee on Dateline. "He touched me on the bottom of my stinger. Bzzzz. Bzzzzz."
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A Mass Protest...
by KW13 inimagine if we could organize an international protest within kingdom halls, similar to the money campaign at last times memorial...perhaps something similar, we should have something ready for next year...
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KungFu
Protest probably isn't the way to go. What's your outcome? If it's to change people's minds or at least to get them to consider other ways of thinking and behaving, you might consider using rational thought and using their existing beliefs to help them to see contradictions within their own belief system. If a person is made consciously aware that their belief systems are contradictory....in enough instances.....using their own standards and their own beliefs as comparisons, you can change minds. For example.......Most people have standards of behavior for themselves and other people that they consider acceptable and unacceptable. Very few people ever think of using that same measuring stick to measure the behavior of the god they worship. They also have standards of rationality. If you illustrate by using examples where a set of behavior violates their standards in one context, and then have them to compare it to a similar situation in a different context, then you can create the beginnings of change. At the very least they might be less fanatical if there's enough "slippage" created between their belief systems....It can create a little bit of flexibility.
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First Time Donating PLASMA!
by esw1966 init's another new step!
i'm donating plasma today!
they take the blood out, get the plasma, and then put the red cells back.
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KungFu
Yay PLASMA!!!! (Now I feel like Slim Goodbody........and if you're reading this and don't know who Slim Goodbody is, I truly pity you.)
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im an atheist and i like the idea of being an athiest but its kinda hard
by Lotus65 inim an atheist and i like the idea that comes with freedom of though and analytical thinking that follows being atheistic vs having a religion im just kinda in a jam because i need to try and find something to completely lose the thoughts in the back of my head that say what if im wrong and i "suffer" because of it.
i feel that if i can find something to destroy these thoughts i can be alot more comfortable with my views and opinions.
anyone have any thoughts on what i should do.
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KungFu
Thanks Gopher,
It worked. Muchas grassyass.
Onto a quick branch from this topic.........
Mental traps you can avoid and tactics to use:
1)Sometimes when we change beliefs or have beliefs contrary to popular opinion, many people have a default belief that they feel they have to justify their beliefs. AVOID this trap like the freakin plague. You have no need to justify your beliefs to people.
2)Make no apologies for your beliefs or views and state them just as forcefully and assuredly as those that try to impose their beliefs on you. Don't be half-assed about your beliefs. Have strong opinions......you can allow yourslef to see other viewpoints when it serves you. Just don't let people try to bully you psychologically, and instead contradict and attack!
Here's an example from my life:
Father: Why don't you believe in Jehovah?
Me: The same reason you don't believe in Zeus, Apollo, Santa Clause or the Tooth Fairy.
Father: I KNOW there is a god.
Me: And I KNOW there's no god.
Or you can find common ground in your belief:
Another real-life example:
Me: You know, even though we have different beliefs about how life got here, we do have some beliefs in common. You believe no-one created God and I believe no-one created the universe. And really, the creator would have to be even more complex than the universe, since he's intelligent enough to create it and powerful enough to. So we're both at the same point. There comes a point where we really have no explanation how something complex couldn't have been created. And the creator is MORE complex than a watch or computer or anything manmade. So we have that in common. We both believe that at some point, something complex wasn't created by anyone.
Father:Sex outside of marriage is wrong.
Me: I have absolutely no problem with sex outside of marriage myself. I think it's more a matter of personal preference.
Father: But the bible says it's wrong.
Me: So what's your point? The bible also says it's okay to stone people to death. Like I said, I see the advantages and disadvantages of monogamy and polygamy. Besides that, you know David and Solomon and Abraham were polygamists. People you admire. So maybe there's something to this polygamy thing. But then again, ONE wife is probably plenty. hahahaha. I kind of feel sorry for guys who are married to 30 women. Poor guy! And if they all divorce him, he splits his money 30 ways.
3) Avoid the trap of having to be "right" or finding the "truth". The best you can do is have some understandings of the world that are as accurate as possible with the limited info you have. The rest you'll either have to take a "I don't know, and that's fine" attitude or forming beliefs that work for you. And realizing that most beliefs have their own logic to them and make sense in their own way. So you can see the world as other people see it without losing a sense of what you believe.....a good way to learn about and connect with people while maintaining your own beliefs. -
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++ Send out some good thoughts to those that need it
by LouBelle infirst of all i miss sademo & that she used to put a weekly vigil up.
everyone needs a bit of tlc, or could do with a bit of upliftment, encouragement, prayers, good vibes...just that little bit of positiveness.. in light of that my dear mum is going through a divorce, and i know it's not easy.. witness 007 is having a rough time & could do with some encouragement.. if you need or know of others that need, then please add your comment.. ian - dansk - i don't know if you still come on here, but if you do, know that i still think about you and still wonder how you are doing.
i'll be sending you some good thoughts and a letter your way...check the mail.. .
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KungFu
Lou said "it's sad that a topic like this hardly gets any posts - but if I put up a topic about boobs or the like, hell there's about 4 / 5 pages."
You mean this isn't topic about boobs? Damn! Double damn! I thought this topic was about boobs and I was about to post about 4 or 5 pages worth of comments myself.........hahahahaha.......Actually, the funny thing is that the divorce might be tough on her right now but she'll probably be really glad when it's all done. When it's over with it will probably be a big relief! Usually change is painful because when we resist, it's painful. The option of sticking around would probably be MORE painful. I think it's a no-lose situation myself. I think she'll be much happier in the long run. I find that if you look hard enough there's usually something positive to gain from even the most negative experiences. And for every bad thing happening, there are a hundred good things about life........By the way, let me know if you run across any topics about boobs. I'd really like to contribute something positive to the discussion. Maybe I should start one myself, about manboobs. "Do chicks find manboobs sexually attractive?"
Now I can see it. You and all of your giggly little girlfriends will be posting 4 or 5 pages worth of lewd, inappropriate comments and I'll have to tell you all to simmer down and take a breather and turn on a fan or something. Then history will repeat itself when I begin a serious post with : "It's sad that a topic like this hardly gets any posts-but if I put up a topic about manboobs or the like, hell, there's about 4/5 pages!!" -
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im an atheist and i like the idea of being an athiest but its kinda hard
by Lotus65 inim an atheist and i like the idea that comes with freedom of though and analytical thinking that follows being atheistic vs having a religion im just kinda in a jam because i need to try and find something to completely lose the thoughts in the back of my head that say what if im wrong and i "suffer" because of it.
i feel that if i can find something to destroy these thoughts i can be alot more comfortable with my views and opinions.
anyone have any thoughts on what i should do.
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KungFu
See, that last post did the same thing.
?????????