Hi, Dean!
Upon reflection, a few more thoughts:
-I think joelbear has a point that you should perhaps sit your son down and tell him that perhaps you acted hastily in forbidding his participation. Ask him his views on education (out of your wife's hearing, of course) and then, in future, if he really, really wants to participate in such talks, let him.
-However, you ARE the head of the household. As crossroads pointed out above, use it. Allowing the freedom to choose above does not mean you become powerless or have no influence.
I was the JW wife of an unbelieving mate. My husband forbade our children to go to evening meetings during the school year. He did not prevent me going. He did not prevent them coming along on Sundays -- as it is a traditional day of worship (and he'd rather golf than take them to Mass! ). He also made sure that they attended parochial schools -- mainly because of the discipline and superior education, but also so they would have a balanced view of religion.
None of the elders ever considered him a "threat to my family's spiritual well-being." They knew that I was conducting a family study at home as the spiritual head, bringing the children to meetings when I could, and trying to balance my wifely responsibilities with my obligations to Jehovah. (As I'm sure your wife is trying to do.) AND teaching them, also, to honor their father's headship.
Part of their father's headship was that he believed in higher education, and that he was going to demand that they all complete high school with university in view. So the courses they took were college preparatory NOT vocational. (Even I expected them to attend university in accordance with their father's wishes and based on today's economic reality.) After that, should they have decided to work part-time and pioneer, I would've been thrilled!!!
-You say your son is quite bright. Great! Chappy's advice to let your unbaptized children have access to information that the borg attempts to keep from the rank and file is good, too. Perhaps you may want to do an exercise with them, beginning with your son. At the www.freeminds.org site there is a page that discusses logic and argumentation. You may wish to go over these with your son, teaching him to recognize the various forms of false argumentation. Dissect news articles and other works of non-fiction with these. DO NOT interfere with his preparation for KH meetings. As he becomes proficient in recognizing assertions, red herrings, false dilemmas, etc., he will begin to see just how often these come up in WT study articles and other study aids. His eyes will be opened, trust me.
In the meantime, communication and love, love, love.
SAVE THE CHILDREN!
outnfree
