Kingpawn

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Posts by Kingpawn

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  71

  Poll: Affection or sex

  by Mimilly in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  if...... you had to choose just one to have for the rest of your life, which would it be?

  affection or sex?

  by affection here i mean snuggling, kissing, hand holding, all the little things.

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  Kingpawn

  Sex. I don't need affection--to be honest it makes me uncomfortable. I don't have it the few times I do get laid so....
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  28

  Coming Out; A Question.

  by Englishman in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  .

  i'm intrigued to see that prisca has decided to "come out" and posted her real pic, (even her car has turned up in a post by stephanaus).

  termite has said "sod 'em all" with the result that her titian locks are visible in umpteen posts, and li'l toe put up his pic right from day one.. my question (to everyone) is this: do you feel that revealing your real identity on this site is an essential part of your departure from the religion of jehovah's witnesses, or do you feel that it doesn't make any difference to your personal growth whether or not you ever reveal who you really are?.

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  Kingpawn

  Mouthy,

  Just wish I knew HOW to post my picture!!!!!

  Might try one of these:

  A) take a pic with a digital camera, use the software on your PC to "send" it to your floppy disk drive, and then update your profile. When it asks for the URL of your pic, you put for example A:kingpawn.jpg--depending on the format it's in, but most every camera saves it as a .jpg file.

  B) Give the path to the photo album where your pics are stored on your hard drive, like c:\my documents\my album\kingpawn.jpg and click upload on your profile update page.

  C) Attach your pic to an e-mail and send it to Simon.

  D) Post it on a homepage if you have one and give that as the URL (Xena does this).

  E) Now all these assume you have a digital pic. For a regular snapshot, use a scanner to make it a computer file. Then try step C).

  Hope this helps.

  As to the question about "outing yourself" (such a common phrase anymore!):

  It's healthy and a way to be defiant to the Society for all it's done to a person. Not everyone can do it for reasons already mentioned. Me? My name's on my profile. I went to the Greenville North Congregation in Greenville Ohio. I got bounced around 1980 after spending more time studying to be a JW than being one. I still have issues with them even today. The thread about the things people did at the KH ("Who was Ahab?" the speaker asked. "Didn't he kill Moby Dick?" a then-dub asked a sister, who started giggling; or Lyin' Eyes(?), who made faces at hubby onstage when he discussed sex in a JW marriage) has given me tears of laughter. Oh, had I only known of this site when it first was born!

  KP
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  45

  Sex at Work...

  by nativenyr23 in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  ok. anybody out there ever fool around at work?

  either with a boss, a subordinate, or just a co-worker??

  want to hear the good and the bad.. inexperienced, naive, and wondering.....

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  Kingpawn

  One thing I haven't seen anyone mention, at least here in the US, is sexual harassment laws. What can happen is A and B have anything from innuendo and flirting to actual sex, and later if the relationship tanks one of them files a complaint against the other. "Today's fling may become tomorrow's filing," as one expert put it in an article some time back. One says it was consensual; the other says they felt coerced. Who's right? Just a big headache for companies too.

  The trouble is it adds an element of excitement to an otherwise dull workday, or it makes one feel good about themselves (what guy doesn't like an attractive woman talking with him--and the reverse?), but as noted by others can create enormous problems between previously-equal co-workers.

  Another reason to avoid it--for women--is there's already enough stereotypes about women "sleeping their way to the top" (an accusation made against Microsoft head honcho Bill Gates' wife Melinda) and the real fact that there are women (my line at work, on the day shift, had a supervisor like this, imho) who would use sex appeal on the job. She'd flirt, bat her eyes, tell about her sex life and make sure her tits were noticeable.

  The point being that women like that make it more difficult for those who want to succeed at work because of their talents. If only one of ten do that, it's assumed the other nine will eventually, in the minds of some. So whatever one does has an effect far beyond her own individual situation.

  I can think of situations where guys might be able to use their looks to similar advantage, but we rarely hear about it.
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  123

  Pro-Life or Pro-Choice--HELP

  by Quincy in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  ok...3 days ago, i found out that i was going to be a father!!

  good new right?

  well then she says that she is considering having an abortion...which i am totally against....so we discussed it...then she started to think that she might have the child....so she talked it over with her twin sister...and she told her to get the abortion...now she says she wants the abortion...now i am upset...not onlly does she want the abortion...but she wants me to pay for the entire thing...so not only am i going to be terminating a developing life...but i have to pay for it????

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  Kingpawn

  Quincy,

  Tell her Mom, tell your Mom, tell everyone you know, that you are a proud expecting farther. Don't let this be her dirty little secret. If this is something she is to do to then let her do it in the light. she can claim the right to kill the baby but she can't claim to have the right to make you go through this in a state of shamed desperate silence.

  I agree with willy_think 100% here. And I go along with those who say you shouldn't have to pay for something you personally oppose. I am absolutely pro-life (even in cases of rape or incest and I don't care who jumps me on that). A woman might say that she was raped and needn't have the additional punishment of carrying the rapist's child to term. My response would be that the child commited no crime and doesn't deserve the death penalty as a result. And she can always adopt the child out. How many loving couples wait for years to adopt, all the while hearing how x number of babies were aborted in y year?

  When I first married and my wife found out we were pregnant she thought sure I was going to leave her. Where she got that idea from I can't remember. Sure, we were young (25 and 23) when my oldest daughter was born. I drove 250 miles a week to work for $3.35/hour (1982 dollars) and she stayed home. (No guarenteed 40 hours/week either.) The point being even with that and no insurance I never considered an abortion. The oldest graduated high school two months ago and her sister will be a junior in high school.

  Enough of that. You, Quince, are the only person you have to live with every day of your life out of the six billion plus on this planet. Whatever you do, make sure you can look at yourself in the mirror next day without shame for your decisions. I commend you for wanting to raise the child alone. You'll find a way--and maybe meet someone more mature in the bargain.
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  22

  Brain Sex Test

  by patio34 in

  1. social
  2. entertainment

  brain sex test .

  introduction .

  it is possible to text how male or female your own mind is.

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  Kingpawn

  Now people going through this forum will see the purple folder and take renewed interest in this thread.

  I got 55, which as I understand it means I can be compatible with both sexes--mentally, anyway.

  But I've been told by women I seem to understand how they think more often than I do guys' thought processes. IOW a woman and I might be chatting and when I speculate on why they did something they've described, or questions I think would have logically come to mind for them, I get statements like "Are you inside my head?"

  Now, as to the theory itself: I don't know. It seems too...what? Simplistic? Stereotypical? In one sense I should welcome it, as it would give more weight to the idea that my homosexuality isn't a choice (though even if told so by God Himself the fundies wouldn't believe it). Yet I suppose what makes me uneasy is the implied assumption that a massive dose of hormones would "cure" me (I hate that phrase).

  As I recall, Dr. David Reuben ("Everything You Wanted...About Sex But...to Ask") mentioned this type of therapy on WWII vets who'd had their testicles shattered by a land mine developed by the Germans. When stepped on, an explosion threw another mine to about waist-high; when it exploded, the testicles went too. Heterosexual men were delighted to regain lost functionality from hormone therapy. Hormone replacement therapy didn't cure gay men of their orientation; it intensified their sex drive instead. (The gay men had this tried on them in an attempt to "cure" them.)
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  22

  Could a person get disfellowshipped for. . .

  by StinkyPantz in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  allowing their 23 year old child to live at home even though this child makes enough money to support themselves and the parent doesn't need their financial support?.

  i ask because my former best friend (who betrayed me to the elders) still lives with her mom.

  she moved in a month before she got df'd even though her mom knew she was close to getting df'd.

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  Kingpawn

  Fe2O3Girl,

  I am very sorry that Reborn2002 considers that my parents, by treating me with natural affection, are "hypocritical, haughty and intolerable".

  If your parents would tell others that their df'ed adult daughter has to be evicted from the house but would willingly keep you if you were also df'ed and of age, then it would be hypocritical. But since your parent's views on the issue weren't stated, no charge of hypocrisy could be made. Personally, I didn't get the impression that Reborn was lumping your mother in with Tasha's.

  As far as StinkyPantz's question--to rat out or not to:

  Anyone here who's ever pulled a similar stunt and now counsels her not to do so would be--the "H" word again, obviously. I guess I'd say if her conscience and religious values can OK it--if she can live with herself afterward--then who am I, who hasn't felt the hurt, to say no? She won't answer to me on it, whatever she decides. Although I too wonder if SP wants to be reinstated at some future date--knowing that would affect what I write here. And even a "no, never" now could change years later.

  I could say "God knows what the score is and He'll handle it."

  I don't know what I feel more--uncomfortable with those who can state a yes or no to her question so definitely or an envy I don't have that certainty myself.
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  6

  for brwneyedgirl

  by LittleOnes in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  hello brwneyedgirl,.

  i am in a simular situation to yours.

  well not exactly.. hey, this is also my first post after lurking here for awhile so hello all :).

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  Kingpawn

  LittleOnes,

  I've read "Lord of the Flies" a couple of times. If her mother is going to say it's bad because of the violence, the lawless savagery displayed by the group that hid out on the far side of the island, and so on, I'd point out to her (the daughter) that the Bible contains stories like Ammon raping Tamar, Noah getting drunk and exposing himself, Lot's two daughters getting their dad drunk so they can get pregnant by him and carry on the family line, everything about David and Bathsheba, and...well, you get the idea. Not to mention the "lusty" sentiments of the Song of Solomon!

  I agree with Sunshine that there's already a huge burden on her which needs attention. Why did she stop seeing the therapist? Was that her stepdad's doing? If she's 18, is she legally an adult in her state? If so, she can make the decision to see the therapist again (could you spring for it?). Because if the burden gets too heavy and she takes what she sees as the only way out, by the sound of it the stepdad'll just say she didn't pray enough, or didn't join "God's organization" and consider himself blameless.

  Let Bill Bowen know about it. Maybe he can help.
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  39

  hi, im new here

  by brwneyedgrl1 in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  .

  hi everyone.

  i hope that you are all having a good day.

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  Kingpawn

  Browneyedgrl1,

  Welcome to JWD. Your situation is one I've seen mentioned here a few times, but I can't remember any where it worked out (if I'm wrong, someone please correct me) over the long run. If you click on "search" in the upper left hand area and type in "my boyfriend is a JW" or "relationship with a JW" etc., you'll find stories similar to yours.

  Megadude started a thread yesterday about the JW's core belief, which basically could be summed up as "the organization, no matter what." Be ready to jettison anything and anybody rather than leave it or risk getting kicked out because you see an obvious contradiction or error.

  This guy, if you were to go back with him (a possibility I sense since you and he still talk, the main issue is religion, and you want him to "see the truth"--he already does, in his view), as others will verify, sooner or later he'll have to `fess up to the elders he's been seeing a "worldly" girl. He'll be strongly counseled against it and that guilt trip they lay on him will make him a cold-hearted ex-suitor, unless he convinces them you're a possible "recruit."

  The fact he got involved with you at all, knowing how the JW's argue against marrying someone of another faith (and marriage's the purpose of dating, you see) as "limping on two different opinions" (1 Kings 18:21) shows he can't make up his mind. Or all the compromising on this issue will have to be from you.

  You have decades of life ahead of you. He's just one guy. Don't bet your future on him.

  Edited by - Kingpawn on 10 August 2002 7:23:27

  Edited by - Kingpawn on 10 August 2002 7:25:30
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  11

  H2O Anon Post: Bill Bowen Threatened

  by Derrick in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm worried sick at the thought that bill bowen is in danger, and sincerely hope those near him will provide his family with protection.

  if the following article on h2o by an anonymous poster bears any truth, then i recommend to bill that he asks the local police for 24 hour home protection (i.e., squad car drive-bys and surveillance).. http://www.aimoo.com/forum/postview.cfm?id=311102&categoryid=2967&startcat=1&threadid=238963.

  bill, you and your family are in my prayers.

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  Kingpawn

  Derrick,

  this includes a very complete home security system that dials both on land and through cellular link to a security firm,

  One problem I've read of with these systems (Medic-Alert and the like) is that the company pays for another firm to respond to alarms from these monitors and call police. But if A doesn't keep paying B to do this, B eventually stops and without telling you. When the alarm goes off there's no one there to call police. I hope home security isn't the same way.

  Edited by - Kingpawn on 10 August 2002 6:22:15
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  22

  chaperones

  by restorebeauty in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  when you all were dating jws, did you have to have a chaperone everytime you went out?

  did you always adhere to this rule?

  how did you get around it without getting caught?.

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  Kingpawn

  When you all were dating JWs, did you have to have a chaperone everytime you went out?

  I had one date with a JW girl, and a chaperone went along. Her (my date's) dad needn't have worried. Getting this girl in the sack was the last thing I had on my mind. On a 1-5 scale I'd've given her a 3.5. Actually the chaperone was better looking so I asked her out! No dice.