((((Momofmany)))) - I think most of us had to go through the process of figuring out how to make friends "in the world". Even though the friendships weren't always "real", the JW world does make for ready made "associates". It definitely isn't a "laughable" subject.
pettygrudger
JoinedPosts by pettygrudger
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45
Social Skills 101 for Newbies
by codeblue in.
pettygrudger and i jokingly chatted about writing a book about this subject...maybe just a "thread" could be of help to newbies that are having problems in learning how to associate beyond jw's.. any suggestions for this new topic?.
codeblue
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I Need Some Help From Child Abuse Victims.
by shamus inthis may be a long read.... my old roommate and i made a "break" from the lie.
we moved away to another town.
i will not mention which town just incase he is lurking..... he was a nice guy.
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pettygrudger
Shamus - there is simply no way for you to know one way or the other. It is possible he was abused, and that his life has become a blur of reality/fantasy ever since.
However, only a good doctor can figure that one out for sure. I would firmly tell this friend that you will be there for him, as long as he is being there for himself by getting the appropriate help.
You're a good man Shamus - hats off to you.
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45
Social Skills 101 for Newbies
by codeblue in.
pettygrudger and i jokingly chatted about writing a book about this subject...maybe just a "thread" could be of help to newbies that are having problems in learning how to associate beyond jw's.. any suggestions for this new topic?.
codeblue
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pettygrudger
Momofmany - is your 6 y.o. in school? A party is always a wonderful way to help your child make friends in the school, and also a nice way to meet other parents. Perhaps a Valentine's Day party (age appropriate of course) - pizza & valentines & games.
The suggestions above were also good too.
Also, you have the Internet - dive into other groups in area's that interest you. Discussion boards, etc.
Meet-up.com is a great place to meet other people who might have similar interests as yourself! (everything from books, to religions (even ex-jw), to politics, to hobbies). Get out there and go!!!
Most importantly, realize that underneath all the shyness & "fear of man" - you are most likely a very interesting person who would make some people very lucky with your friendship!
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Everybody, I need your help re Daughter
by xjw_b12 inas some of you know, when cj and i were married, i adopted her daughter, and raised her as my own.
i love her so much, i never referred to her as step-daughter, and never will.
she calls me dad, even though her biological father, somehow found his way out out of the woodwork, when she turned 18.
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pettygrudger
Your house - your rules.
Separate sleeping arrangements would be mandatory in my home. You have teenagers still with you, who need to understand that sexuality also entails responsibility, and revered as special. Not something that should be shared with any boyfriend one happens to be dating at the time. (IMHO)
THere is nothing wrong with some old fashion morality once in awhile. Your daughter & her boyfriend should have no problems respecting your wishes in this regard. They aren't living together in Toronto, so therefore should not be allowed to shack up at your place.
My hubby agrees with me, and he was raised with NO religion
P.S. XJW - Believe me, your oldest daugher KNOWS who her "real" father is - I think you'd be suprised at how wise children are in this regard, especially as they enter into adulthood.
Besides - they'll just have to "sneak" around like the rest of us did - gives one some pretty good memories as we get older
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33
Anti-Vaccination
by Elsewhere ini recently spoke with a few new mothers who are adamantly against vaccination.
they went on and on about horrible dangers associated with vaccinating your children.. even after listening to their stories i am very doubtful of the validity of the claims.
what is your view on this if you have one?.
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pettygrudger
http://www.whale.to/vaccines/wakefield.html
For those that wish to see the studies that are being done in the U.K.
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Anti-Vaccination
by Elsewhere ini recently spoke with a few new mothers who are adamantly against vaccination.
they went on and on about horrible dangers associated with vaccinating your children.. even after listening to their stories i am very doubtful of the validity of the claims.
what is your view on this if you have one?.
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pettygrudger
It's not the vaccinations themselves that are inheirently the problem - it is the way they are administered and the way the U.S. & European nations give them out.
I personally know of MANY mothers through my work in Autism that swear their children's Autism was caused by the MMR vaccination - and studies in the U.K. are bearing evidence that there is a link.
In countries where the MMR is given mono instead of tri - cases of Autism have not increased. In countries where the MMR is given in the tri-form - cases have risen as much as 500% - not including those that have had proven Thermisol (mercury) poisoning which could be directly linked back to the vacinnations given them. (vaccinations are kept preserved with Thermisol, and usually given to the Doctor's office in 10-dose vials. If the nurse doesn't shake that vial real good - guess what the 10th child in that office is getting instead of a good dose of vaccination?)
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45
Social Skills 101 for Newbies
by codeblue in.
pettygrudger and i jokingly chatted about writing a book about this subject...maybe just a "thread" could be of help to newbies that are having problems in learning how to associate beyond jw's.. any suggestions for this new topic?.
codeblue
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pettygrudger
"How Not to Let Yourself be Affected by Other People's Issues"!!!!
"Being a True Friend - Yes Man or Tell Me Like it Is?"
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47
Pro Life, pro choice?
by got my forty homey? ini always have felt that the following expressions were stupid, why dont they just call it pro abortion, anti abortion.
anyway, knowing our backgrounds as jw's what is your viewpoint on this highly debated issue?
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pettygrudger
Condoms don't always work....birthcontrol pills don't always work....rape happens....you don't know other people's circumstances. Make your own decisions and live with them and leave me to make mine and live with them...
No truer words have ever been said in such a simple way.
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47
Pro Life, pro choice?
by got my forty homey? ini always have felt that the following expressions were stupid, why dont they just call it pro abortion, anti abortion.
anyway, knowing our backgrounds as jw's what is your viewpoint on this highly debated issue?
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pettygrudger
Yeru - I am not meaning this to sound mean, or be insultive. But, I do find it highly strange that a man in your position is such a pro-lifer. Considering the company you work for, and what that company is willing to do to protect the people of this country, do you not find this a tad hypocritical?
If a woman chooses abortion, it is usually because she is protecting either herself or perhaps looking at the best interests of her family. What gives you or anyone else that matter the right to "judge" what she does with her body?
I went with a friend not to long ago to one of those "clinics" - I have never been so disgusted in my whole life. It was a Saturday. The women all showed up before 8:00 A.M. for paperwork & all the other necessary procedures. The actual procedures don't begin until after 12:00 noon. So, there sit 40-50 women, all waiting their turn. A lot having the physical symptoms of pregnancy (nausea, etc.) but unable to do anything about it, as they cannot eat or drink anything until after the procedure. So, for 4-1/2 hours they sit there and suffer. Outside, a group of Christians were picketing, praying, chanting & holding up signs calling these women murderer's, etc, while their own children sat there, probably wishing their parents would actually spend some time with them for a change
Then, after 12:00, they all start going into the back, like cattle herding really. There's only 1 doctor with several assistants, and they start turning the women out, 1 by 1. Done & over by 2:00 (my g/f was one of the last). I sat there with her while she was treated as nothing but a piece of meat - there was no humanity to it whatsoever. "Get up on the table, put your feet in the stirrups" etc. etc. Then the doctor comes in and without so much of a word starts his business. The machine turns on (horribly loud I might add) and he begins. My girlfriend instantly is in extreme traumatic pain, and can do nothing. She squirms, the doctor says "stay still", she tries to stay still as her uterus is sucked out of her without any pain medication whatsoever (okay, they do use a little on the cervix, but from what I can see, it ain't helping at all). The machine shuts off and the doctor walks out, without having said more than 3 words. She was cramping horribly, and was escorted to the "recovery" area - nothing but a bunch of plastic recliners with 10 other women, all in various stages of pain, emotional, mental & physical.
My g/f didn't talk much on the way home, but she cried. I don't blame her - I was crying to. Not only because of her choice, but because of how much was taken from her on so many different levels in the process, and how dirty we both felt for even having been there. She was only 3 weeks along, and this procedure did more than end a pregnancy.
These "Christians" - who are they to judge? Who were they to make her (and me as well) feel so "dirty" for being there? What scripture in the bible gives any "Pro-Lifer's" the right to do & say what they do and say? From what I understand about the Bible, only God has that right.
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47
Pro Life, pro choice?
by got my forty homey? ini always have felt that the following expressions were stupid, why dont they just call it pro abortion, anti abortion.
anyway, knowing our backgrounds as jw's what is your viewpoint on this highly debated issue?
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pettygrudger
I'll just quickly say (before this gets locked) that I am pro-birth control. If you dont want a child you should know what to do. abortion should not be used as a means for birth control.
But therein lies the crux of the matter as well. I was on 2 forms of birth control (contraceptive gel & the sponge) along with the rythm method the last 2 times I conceived. Unable to tolerate other forms of control, and I won't even begin to say why condoms won't work in our situation I did not choose abortion as an alternative.
I am in agreement with the gentleman who expressed disagreement with life beginning at conception - it is really not that simple. The fetus is not a viable entity with its own brain & heart for a few weeks after conception.
For those that believe otherwise, are also saying the "morning after" pill should not be allowed.
I do not agree with abortion after the 3-4th week of conception, unless there is a medical necessity.
Anyone who would believe a woman uses Abortions as "birth control" has not either experienced the procedure or been with someone who has. It's extremely painful, physically, emotionally & mentally. Along with all the physical pain of an abortion, the woman must also suffer through the emotional issues that come with the change in hormones & the mental abuse that comes with all the stigmatism that is placed on her by the "Pro-Lifer's".