In trying to deal with the everyday realities of our existence, we usually pick "catch phrases" or principles with which we use to try & guide our life, growth & development. What are yours?
In my case, the #1 thing that I try to live by is to take what is mine & own it. Yep, I didn't have the best circumstances growing up, and had some pretty crappy things that happened to me as a child. But, once I became an independent adult, the only person I could hold accountable for myself was myself. Marrying the first worldly boy that asked, without using proper judgement, was MY fault. Sure, it was based on the wrong programming, but in order to undo this programming, I had to accept & realize that it was MY programming that led me to be in the relationship I was. He could be an abusive jerk till the sun turned blue - I am the one that chose to be with him, marry him, bear a child by him, and to eventually leave him. In order to grow, the only way we can imho is to learn from our mistakes, which is ours & ours alone. I had a friend tell me when discussing this last evening that I wasn't giving myself a "break". I had to think about that & conclude that in my case, I didn't deserve one. I'm glad I don't give myself one - or I'd probably be with another abusive jerk in one way or another.
#2 - That today is a new day - and the beginning of the rest of my life. Who I am today, what I want to be, where I want to go - these are all ahead of me in the future. The past should only be a reference point in figuring out why I'm not where I want to be, where I dropped the ball along the way, and how to avoid the same pitfalls in the future.
So, what words do you live by?
