Posts by ruderedhead

20

I need help

by tiredroadie in

im new here, and dont know much about jw, other than what im reading.

i have my best friend who is having bible study in her home with 2 witnesses, and she is soaking it in.

she is very defensive and is getting more and more closed off.

You're receiving some great advice on here from people who have gone through a lot. Are you yourself familiar with the Bible? The witnesses are very good at cherry picking scriptures to suit their doctrine of the moment. I will repeat what others have said and ask you to go to jwfacts.com. there is a wealth of information there. Use it SLOWLY in the form of asking questions as one eyejoe & jhine have suggested.

Your friend is definately being love bombed, told that satan is using you to try and stop her study( "your friend means well, but doesn't have "the truth" as we do, satan is using him/her"). They will use cherry picked scriptures to try and show her they are right, the "true" religion, etc. Do you know exactly what they have taught your friend yet? If you do, maybe you could work on disproving some of that through the Bible first? Do your homework, know what you're talking about. Use jwfacts as well as other reputable sources.

Do you know a pastor who is well versed in scripture who would be willing to sit down with both of you and go over some of the things they have told her, and discuss the scriptures involved? That may hold some weight.

The fact that she is puling away is concerning. I hate to admit it, but I did that with the urging of the witnesses who would come to my home to study. I wish the resources that are available today were then, and that someone had used them to stop me. But the witnesses are taught how to be manipulative and kind of bullies, for lack of a better word. If she enjoys their company and the compliments they are no doubt giving her , they may threaten to stop coming if she questions them, telling her they aren't going to waste their time if she just wants to argue. Presenting them with facts that contradict what they are telling her is not considered discussion, it is considered arguing. Can you organize some social things to fill some time? Just a suggestion.

You're going to get much good, sound advice on here from some who have been through the mill! You might want to read some of their stories. All the best to you as you try to help your friend! Remember to never be confrontational.

34

OMG: WT legislating about fragances and common sense

by pixel in

do they have to tell the r&f every little detail???.

from the new wt:.

what can be done to assist brothers and sisters who suffer from adverse reactions to fragrances?any who are sensitive to fragrances face a difficult challenge.

ruderedhead

Blondie hit the nail on the head in her last sentence about those who are allergic at the kh, but apparently no other place! I had never heard of so many "allergies" as I heard of at the first kh I attended! Perfume, down, new carpet, chronic fatigue, you name it! There were a few public needs talks given on being sensitive to those with the allergies, and could people please refrain from wearing scents. I wore scented powder on occasion, and was in fs with a woman who had real (not really real, but real to her) scent allergies, and the woman who studied with me. Real allergy woman asked if I was wearing any scents, said she was allergic to my scent , was getting a headache, and couldn't go in fs with me. The other woman said she wondered if it was just her, that she had a splitting headache from my "scent" as well, and couldn't go out with me. The next day we were in fs in her van, I was in the back, and HER perfume, that I could smell all the way in the back, actually made me sick! I wasn't allergic, just hated the perfume. I said nothing. We all have several stories like that, I'm sure.

As leaving quietly said, there are those with real allergies, but I found those were the ones that rarely complained. I think the others just wanted attention.

75

My Parents have gone FULL CULT MODE! Having a job is SATANIC!

by BU2B in

jw
friends

to give a little background, my parents are in their late 50s.

around a year ago, my elder dad got laid off from his job.

he worked as a auto mechanic making ok money.

ruderedhead

Wow! This is insane! Sounds like yo need to have a very serious conversation with the, letting them know that you are NOT their "provision", you're just keeping your own family's heads above water! Others have given what I beleive to be some very astute talking points, along with scripture and a very good analogy from walls.

Can you find the scripture that been-there mentioned? If you can find that one, along with a couple others to make your point, maybe it will help. What about the one, I believe it is in Psalms(?), that speaks about all that a woman does?

Hope you can wake them up fast! Maybe a flow chart of money in/money out, you ain't got none, you need some income, would help?

Hope this works out for you!

55

A young girl shouts down a Street preacher

by fulltimestudent in

jw
friends

got to admit that when some of these screechers get wound up, ive felt the same as the young lady.. http://www.9news.com.au/world/2014/11/06/08/34/girl-tells-street-preacher-to-shut-up.

.

ruderedhead

cognizant dissident, very well articulated. Thank you.

55

A young girl shouts down a Street preacher

by fulltimestudent in

jw
friends

got to admit that when some of these screechers get wound up, ive felt the same as the young lady.. http://www.9news.com.au/world/2014/11/06/08/34/girl-tells-street-preacher-to-shut-up.

.

ruderedhead

And in case you missed it, she also resorts to name calling. She called him a pie hole. For those that think that's ok, what would you think if he had called her an obnoxious brat?

55

A young girl shouts down a Street preacher

by fulltimestudent in

jw
friends

got to admit that when some of these screechers get wound up, ive felt the same as the young lady.. http://www.9news.com.au/world/2014/11/06/08/34/girl-tells-street-preacher-to-shut-up.

.

ruderedhead

Thought I would re-visit this post to see where it was going. Kind of surprised that so many think this obnoxious little brat is funny!

I disagree with you, vidiot, that he is doing it not for others, but simply to save himself. When I was a witness, I truly thought I needed to get as many people into the "truth" (just puked in my mouth a little, sorry!) as I could. Just used different tactics. Look at the date on the video. Right before halloween in Salem, MA? Probably seemed like the perfect opportunity to this poor, over zealous guy! If you look, you'll see everyone is ignoring him, but look back when the little brat starts with her mouth. I'd be willing to bet, again, that she's the mean girl/bully in her class. And her parents probably think that's funny too! I've watched these kinds of kids in the schools, and everyone just blames the ones they're mis-treating, as some are doing here. "Well, Little Miss Disrespectful said so & so was actually bothering her, and her friends, who don't want to be her next victim, said that was correct".

He was not in anyones face or pointing/yelling at anyone. Her asshole parents could have kept moving and had fun doing something else.

55

A young girl shouts down a Street preacher

by fulltimestudent in

jw
friends

got to admit that when some of these screechers get wound up, ive felt the same as the young lady.. http://www.9news.com.au/world/2014/11/06/08/34/girl-tells-street-preacher-to-shut-up.

.

ruderedhead

She looks at the camera a few times, she knows she's being filmed and was probably put up to it by an adult. It is just as easy to keep walking and ignore someone who you have no interest in as it is to stop and berate them. Easier, in fact.

This kid is being raised as a brat, she is rude and obnoxious. Probably has obnoxious, under educated parents. She has not been taught tolerance. Yes, the guy was probably annoying some people, and maybe someone should talk to the city about the use of the microphone, but it makes me wonder if this little brat is a bully or mean girl at school?

38

Interesting Religious Conversation with my Daughter...

by garyneal in

yesterday, my wife was getting ready for the kh and told the kids that they had to get ready too.

i figured, oh well, they're heading to the hall at least i can get the time i need to catch up on some house work and what not.

before i know it, the wife gave up and allowed the kids to stay.

ruderedhead

You had a reasonable conversation with your daughter. Since it visibly upsets your wife, perhaps just tell her things you did with them, and other conversations you had, so she doesn't think you're trying to undermine her, which you obviously are not. If the girls mention it, you can deal with it then as if it's not that big a deal.

You just never know what her friends at the hall will tell her if she relays the conversation to them. Some are reasonable, some over the top, some just like to cause trouble cause they have nothing else going. Sometimes, the less said, the better.

Sounds like you are a great husband and Father!

20

Help

by Horseygirl12 in

jw
friends

im so frustrated i could kill myself right now!!

im 15 and a couple weeks ago i confessed to my parents that i didn't want to be a jehovahs witness anymore and also that i was bisexual.

i had just gotten back from an eating disorder clinic and my parents decided to put me back in school (i was homeschooling before).

ruderedhead

Sweetheart, you're 15, you have an eating disorder, you're cutting & you're depressed. If your parents aren't getting you professional help, I'm BEGGING YOU to ask them to get you the PROFESSIONAL help you so desperately need. Everyone on this forum is here for you, but you have issues that obviously require a trained professional.

15 is too young for sexual relations. Crushes, kissing, fine. If you're a lesbian, you're a lesbian. Worry about that more after you've resolved some of the other issues you have. In the, end you don't need to discuss your sexual orientation right now with your parents. I don't know if this is too much information for you, but about 8 years ago, there was a young woman running a dance studio where one of my children went. She is a lesbian, and , a couple girls, who were teens just a bit older than yourself, and still in high school, dated her. I don't believe she preyed on them, they just had other issues and were looking for someplace to fit in. One Mom put a stop to it due to the daughters age, and the daughter is actually not a lesbian .I believe the other was with her a while, don't know the end story on that one. When one has multiple problems in life, we may gravitate towards someone who is being kind to us, even thought they are not preying on you, you seek their kindness and attention. In a couple of years, after you have worked through some things, you'll be wiser and more mature, you will know.

12

tough year

by GoUnion in

hello everyone just wanted to give a litte update on my leaving jws.

i was an active ms up till the beginning of this year and things were going pretty good up till now.

my wife is active and that has been tough but we were managing.. two months ago my older brother passed of a sudden heart attack.

ruderedhead

GoUnion, I'm truly sorry for the loss of your brother, and the demise of your marriage. Please keep an eye on your BP, you have some serious stress factors in your life right now.

Have you and your wife considered marriage counseling? I am assuming you still love her. Right now staying together for a while and trying to work through the problems may be a solution for you both, emotionally and financially. If you can't reconcile thingsin the end, you will have tried. I believe you have far too much going on right now to make a decision such as divorce. Take a little more time and try the counseling, please. Who knows, maybe something will happen to make her doubt the WT.

Take care of your health, my friend.