Posts by NotFormer

83

Lines you would never hear from a Jehovah's Witness

by Ron.W. in

a slightly tongue in cheek, but also serious roundup of jw speak and why trying to reason with them is like trying to chip through concrete with a plastic spoon.. how many can you think of??.

elder: 'yes.

i read through the material you asked me to at your judicial meeting - you're right we're both in a cult!

August WT: DF'ing renamed "Removed." AKA: GB re-arranging the deck chairs on the Titanic

by WingCommander in

jw
friends

so: the mystery has been clarified as to more "new light" / clarifications of decades old doctrine and procedure.

august watchtower has finally been leaked.

disfellowshipping?

NotFormer

"Being “ removed “ actually sounds worse. It is like they have a mob hitman on stand by ready to kill you."

Sort of like "dealt with" and other mob-like euphemisms.

"Marking" as a term gives me bad vibes. It reminds me of "pointing the bone":

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kurdaitcha

2

Lines You Never Used To Hear From A JW (But You Can Now)

by NotFormer in

inspired by ron.w.

's thread:.

https://www.jehovahs-witness.com/topic/5992982038183936/lines-you-would-never-hear-from-jehovahs-witness.

NotFormer

Inspired by Ron.W.'s thread:

https://www.jehovahs-witness.com/topic/5992982038183936/lines-you-would-never-hear-from-jehovahs-witness

In honour of the light getting ever brighter, post your examples of this thread's title.

I'll start:

"Nice beard, Elder Jones!"

"Those slacks look so very practical for field service, especially in this weather, Sister Smith!"

83

Lines you would never hear from a Jehovah's Witness

by Ron.W. in

a slightly tongue in cheek, but also serious roundup of jw speak and why trying to reason with them is like trying to chip through concrete with a plastic spoon.. how many can you think of??.

elder: 'yes.

i read through the material you asked me to at your judicial meeting - you're right we're both in a cult!

NotFormer

"What happens behind the bedroom door is none of our business". (Apologies if someone has said it already - the thread is getting rather long!)

83

Lines you would never hear from a Jehovah's Witness

by Ron.W. in

a slightly tongue in cheek, but also serious roundup of jw speak and why trying to reason with them is like trying to chip through concrete with a plastic spoon.. how many can you think of??.

elder: 'yes.

i read through the material you asked me to at your judicial meeting - you're right we're both in a cult!

NotFormer

After the August Watchtower:

"And now for the marking talk".

"Oh, he was disfellowshipped!"

"No, we can't talk about unspiritual matter X, you're disfellowshipped!"

46

August WT: DF'ing renamed "Removed." AKA: GB re-arranging the deck chairs on the Titanic

by WingCommander in

jw
friends

so: the mystery has been clarified as to more "new light" / clarifications of decades old doctrine and procedure.

august watchtower has finally been leaked.

disfellowshipping?

"Why all the cunning and lying about changes that are not real and thinking they're going to trick the Secular Authorities? JUST MAKE IT AN INDIVIDUAL CONSCIENCE MATTER. Most diehard JWs will follow tradition and shun dissenters and WT won't have to LIE about it all."

This is my question too. Genuinely loosening the reins wouldn't cost them too much.

At its core and at the top, the WT seems to be about how hardline they are. The rules seem over the top from the beginning. As in, not as harsh as is necessary to maintain order, but as harsh as they can get away with.

And this is the case now. Instead of a genuine backing away from harsh and unkind rules, they are only lessening them in the minimum sense that they think can persuade governments that they have changed.

As an outsider, I can see that the change is cosmetic. Governments are likely to see it that way too.

Ironically, if the WT was consulting with the exes, they might get some good clues as to what genuine changes need to be made. After all, these are the people with whom the various governments are consulting. The governments will simply ask the exes whose testimonies they have on their books if this is a substantial change, and the exes will simply answer "No".

46

August WT: DF'ing renamed "Removed." AKA: GB re-arranging the deck chairs on the Titanic

by WingCommander in

jw
friends

so: the mystery has been clarified as to more "new light" / clarifications of decades old doctrine and procedure.

august watchtower has finally been leaked.

disfellowshipping?

NotFormer

"I was really hoping for the lifting of the ban on oral sex. I really was."

The two witnesses rule is your friend.

9

Paul Gillies and JW Spellcasting July 2024

by FragrantAddendum in

gillies is moving up quick.

wonder what kind of devilish acts he's done to get that job so fast.

hey, look!

NotFormer

The upside down JW reflection reminds me of the Loch Ness Monster: long neck and two humps.

13

JW Ranking System

by NotFormer in

it's fairly evident to little old outsider me that the organisation has a class system, perhaps even a caste system.. from what i've read, there seems to not only be an official ranking system (m.s., elder, c.o.

) but an unofficial one.

has anyone ever sat down to figure out what the unofficial ranks are and how they affect the pecking order?

NotFormer

That's pretty well what I am fishing for, Blondie. I would imagine something like that has been listed on here, probably decades ago, and probably more than once, but like you, I'm not sure how to search for it.

7

Have Witnesses made more false prophecies then any other religion??

by Witness 007 in

armagedon in 1914 rutherford 1925 1940's the fascist catholic take over franz 1975 and 2000 the 1914 generation will not die.

now the generation that new the generation....this must break a world record of false prophecies in any religion..

NotFormer

Jeffro, Seriously?? They went there?? The effrontery is palpable!

The irony of that article being 100 years after 1914 should not be lost on us, either.