Ok, here's the corrected post (Simon, FYI it keeps happening that editing my posts results in other changes and even deleted sections)
So I met with them last night, and even though I knew I probably shot myself
in the foot, I decided to layout a defense based on my conscience not being
respected. Here's a brief summary:
They began by saying that they had brothers coming to them left and right
anguished by the book they saw me post and that now they were in a situation
where they needed to act because the matter had become public and the friends
need some kind of response as to what my status is (basically telling me they
need to show friends they are handling the matter)
I started then by saying I should not have posted the FB link. I had
originally promised myself I would not interfere with others faith, so, I told
them I regret doing it and thus breaking my own pledge and that I would not do
it again.
Having said that, I outlined the situation I'm in and what motivated me to
post that book was the issue I wanted to bring to light, it being the lack of a
way to exit this org without severe and cruel punishment. I showed them the
July/2009 Awake article that says one should not have to choose between family
and beliefs. When presented with this, they stuttered a bit, mumbled some words
and ended up saying "well, that applies to other religions", to which
I nodded my head and said: "you see?". I mentioned how before the early 80s, JWs
were allowed to disassociate without the punishment of excommunication and that
after that policy changed it created a big community of dissidents that had no
viable options to leave. I told them how I got caught up in the moment from
reading experiences of grandmas being cut off from their family, or teens
committing suicide, and so I felt like I needed to speak up. That's why I
posted that in FB. However, (I brown nosed a bit) and told them that I realize
it was not the appropriate way of doing it; that perhaps I should have instead
tried writing the branch or venting directly with the elders.
I pleaded with them, reminding them that in my situation, an expulsion would
be not a 1 or 2 year thing, but rather, a lifetime punishment. My kids would be raised without getting to
know their grandparents. I’d be dead to
them, and all because my conscience dictates I cannot continue serving God in
this way. I read to them the first few
verses of Romans 14 which states to not judge someone because of differing
opinion, to which they nodded their head and knew not what to say.
Then they went on to defend “the truth”, one of them saying that before
learning it, he had been a Catholic, yet didn’t see “truth” there, then he went
to the Adventists and saw no “truth” there, to which I interrupted and said: “but
you were able to leave said religions when your conscience told you to do
so. Do we JWs have the same right to do
so without severe and cruel punishment?
After a while of back-and-forth along these lines, I again mentioned that I
regretted posting the FB link and that I would not do it again, thanked them
for their time, drifted off into conversing about one of the elder's sick
elderly father who is currently in the hospital, and ended the meeting without
prayer.
My thoughts: This meeting seemed to me to be just a formality. I could tell
by their faces that coming into the meeting, they were ready to establish a JC
no matter what. However, they were taken back a bit with the defense I put up
regarding my conscience not being respected and so by the end of the meeting,
it seemed to me that they were at a lost as to how they would proceed.
What I suspect happened was that when I objected to the JC during their initial
call to inform me of it, they made a spur the moment decision to have the
"admonishing" meeting I requested, figuring it would basically just
be a meeting to tell me why a JC must occur. I suspect they never even told the
rest of the BoE of their accepting to meet with me before the JC. Now, how will
they tell the rest of the body that they went against their vote for a judicial
committee and instead met with me, and even worst, how will they try to argue
now in my favor? They wont, I doubt it.
I suspect they will meet in the next meeting, they will explain that they
met with me first as per some request of mine, they will say I regretted
posting the FB link but that I did not want to get DF'd because I didn't want
to lose my family. The rest of the body will probably say something along the
lines of "oh well, he should have thought of that before making the
decisions that he did. He's the one that left. Jehovah's law is clear and the
holy spirit has already guided us to decide on the matter that there must be a
JC". So, I'm almost certain I will get a call within the next few days to
schedule the committee meeting.
Now, something I did hear the brothers mention is that a JC does not
necessarily mean expulsion, kinda hinting to me that an option would be to
publicly reprove me. That way the friends would see that action was taken in
this public matter, and I would not be excommunicated. I don't know what to
make of this.
