Splash

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Posts by Splash

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  15

  Yorkshire Ripper Peter Sutcliffe 'planning his own Jehovah's Witness funeral' at Broadmoor

  by jwleaks in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  yorkshire ripper peter sutcliffe 'planning his own jehovah's witness funeral' at broadmoor.

  10 february 2015. while charles manson is busy avoiding being displayed in a glass coffin by his now ex-fiancee, peter sutcliffe is managing his own mortality within the confines of broadmoor hospital.. .

  the yorkshire ripper apparently met with funeral directors to plan his own send-off.. sutcliffe, 68, contacted holmes and family funeral directors, whose office is three miles away from the high security hospital in berkshire.. he apparently wishes for the ceremony to be performed in line with his jehovahs witness beliefs.. sutcliffe was handed 20 life sentences for brutally murdering 13 women in the north of england between 1975 and 1980, and attempting to murder seven others.. police believed his killing spree started after he was conned out of money by a prostitute and her pimp.. however, sutcliffe later claimed the voice of god had commanded him to undertake the killings.. the independent (lots of photos of broadmoor psychiatric prison).

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  Splash

  Who's the lucky elder who will conduct his funeral.

  I'm certain that once he's died it will make national news and TV.
• 
  14

  Matthew 1:17 & 42 Generations

  by campaign of hate in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  if we are to look at matthew 1:17, looks like there were 42 generations from abraham to jesus.. if we take 1948 bce (abraham's birth) and we take it to jesus baptisim (29 ce) we get to 1,977 years.. so lets divide 1977 years by 42 (the amount of generations), we get to around 47 years for one generation.. 1 generation = 47 years.. 1 generation + an overlapping generation (1 generation more) = 94 years.. this is all in the first chapter of the new testament..... comments welcome.....

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  Splash

  The Bible gives a few indications about the length of a generation.
  Unsurprisingly none of them are 200 years long (which is the length of the current teaching of 'generation')

  35 years: (Job 42:16, 17) "And Job continued living after this a hundred and forty years and came to see his sons and his grandsons—four generations.

  37 years: Jerusalem was destroyed about 37 years later when Jesus said "this generation will by no means pass away"

  38 years: Deut 2:14 - And the days that we walked from Ka′desh-bar′ne·a until we crossed the torrent valley of Ze′red were thirty-eight years, until all the generation of the men of war had come to their end.

   

  (Mt 1:17) "All the generations, then, from Abraham until David were fourteen generations, and from David until the deportation to Babylon fourteen generations, and from the deportation to Babylon until the Christ fourteen generations":

   - Abraham to David : 2018BCE -> 1107BCE / 14 generations = 65 years
   - David to deportation : 1107BCE -> 607BCE / 14 generations = 35 years
   - Deportation to Christ : 607BCE -> 29CE / 14 generations = 45 years
• 
  128

  YOU MIGHT BE A J.W.

  by brandnew in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  if getting ready means putting on a suit........ you might be a j.w.. if going out to the field has nothing to do with grass, baseball diamonds, or football ......... you might be a j.w.. please continue my friends.......i know ya got some.....; ).

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  Splash

  If your best friend of many years suddenly grows a beard and you instantly grow suspicious of him - You are a JW.

  If you try to redefine well understood words such as "generation", "rulership" or "career" - You are a JW.

  If you know what leukocytes are but never went to school beyond 16 - You are a JW.

  If you can stare a fact in the face yet still convince yourself it's not true - You are a JW.

  If you use the phrase "that makes sense to me" more than once per week - You are a JW.

  If your idea of a fun day at the beach involves being dressed in long trousers - You are a JW.

  If you've lost your car keys and you think the best way of finding them is by saying a prayer - You are a JW.

  If you have sung the same song every month for 20 years but still don't know the words by heart - You are a JW.
• 
  18

  Conversation with a “Genius" JW

  by Bloody Hotdogs! in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  this is a real conversation i had with a jw friend last night.

  several times previously he claimed to be a certified genius, having supposedly passed the mensa test.... .

  me: so what do you think about jws condoning the idea that dinosaurs could have lived with humans?.

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  Splash

  Barrold Bonds Anyone have that quote wrt dinosaurs and humans living at the same time?

  The closest I could find was this WT quote, but in true WT style it never nails it's colours to the mast.

  *** w73 7/15 p. 447 Questions From Readers ***
  

  ...this would mean that dinosaurs were created on the fifth “day.” (Gen. 1:21) We do not know whether they continued to exist until man was created (toward the close of the sixth “day”). At the very latest it seems likely that they must have disappeared off the earth at the time of the flood of Noah’s day.
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  18

  Trolley Stands Up, Door-to-Door Work Down?

  by steve2 in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  several threads have discussed the increased use of of the trolley work by witnesses in various countries (e.g, australia, new zealand, the states, canada and britain to name a few).

  several posters have described trolley settings as largely ignored by passersby and/or the witnesses immersed in everything other than appearing ready and waiting to make contact with passersby.

  what impact will this increased shift to trolley work have on the hallmark feature of jws, their door-to-door work?

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  Splash

  D2D zeal exists within the congregation but only by the older ones and by pioneers.
  Even the elders are not zealous, but they are compelled more than most to look enthusiastic.

  The older ones are starting to tire and die off, but the pioneers will continue to set the pace.
  Especially as the pioneer hour requirement drops and they are treated as special by means of titles, special meetings, special schools, announcements, etc. there will always be those totally 'in' pioneers going D2D.

  This is what the Soc is driving for with their relentless promoting of pioneering.
• 
  30

  Does anyone have the Awake! January 1 1989? - 20th Century Quote

  by jwfacts in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  the awake!

  january 1 1989 contains the quote on page 12 "he was laying a foundation for a work that would be completed in our 20th century.

  " this was later changed in the bound volume and on the cd library to "in our day.".

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  Splash

  There are a few magazines you should collect for this teaching:

  w50 2/1 pp. 35-37 pars. 1-12 What Do You Do with Your Time?
  "The appointed time has grown very short." (1 Cor. 7:29, An Amer. Trans.) This sobering pronouncement from the lips of one of the world's foremost authorities on Christianity should be thoughtfully considered by men living in this twentieth century. What time, then, grown so short could possibly affect this generation?" Paul looked confidently forward to the end of the present system of things with its confusion, corruption and violence; and his confidence was based on Holy Scripture and the words of his Master, Christ Jesus. Do you know that the very signs Jesus foretold and his apostles looked for have seen fulfillment on this present generation?

  "Perhaps several generations will yet come and go before God's wrath is expressed against wickedness and its final end brought about." Such a conclusion should be hastily dismissed from mind. (Matt. 24:34) It is the generation you are living in that is primarily concerned.

  As it comes on apace, let us not be found among the scoffers who push the end into the remote future saying, "Perhaps sometime, but not in our day!" Such a group has lived upon this earth in the past.

   

  Awake! 1961 Feb 22 p. 7
  That now-operating kingdom in heaven will, within the twentieth century, cleanse the entire earth of wickedness... Can you not see that the twentieth century is the century indicated by the prophetic language of Matthew 24, Mark 13, Luke 21, and 2 Timothy 3?

   

  Awake! 1961 Feb 22 p. 8
  ...is it not only logical that whatever else is recorded in these above-mentioned Bible chapters must also come upon the twentieth century? ... Revelation 16:16 calls it the "war of the great day of God the Almighty," Armageddon. This war will come in the twentieth century. ...Now is the time to heed Bible prophecy concerning the twentieth century and live forever in the sunshine of God's new world.

   

  Awake! 1962 July 22 p. 32
  But how many realize that it contains information of special interest to those of us who live in this climactic twentieth century?

   

  The Nations Shall Know That I Am Jehovah p. 216
  "Shortly, within our twentieth century, the "battle in the day of Jehovah" will begin against the modern antitype of Jerusalem, Christendom."

   

  Watchtower 1984 March 1 pp.18-19
  "Some of that "generation" could survive until the end of the century. But there are many indications that "the end" is much closer than that!"

   

  Let Your Kingdom Come 1981 p.11
  ...now in our 20th century, we have come to the time for harvest — "a conclusion of a system of things, and the reapers are angels"!

   

  Revelation Climax (1988 - removed from the 1996 revision) chap. 34 p. 246 par. 1
  The John class today also wonders with great wonderment as events unfold in fulfillment of the prophetic vision. If people of the world could see it, they would exclaim, 'Incredible!' and the world's rulers would echo, 'Unthinkable!' But the vision becomes a startling 20th-century reality.

   

  Watchtower 1989 January 1 p.12 (loose copy magazine):
              "He was laying a foundation for a work that would be completed in our 20th century." 
• 
  13

  The Theory Of Everything

  by 88JM in

  1. social
  2. entertainment

  question: should able-bodied actors play characters with disabilities?.

  i got myself into a bit of a quandary over a discussion on a facebook group.

  it was partly based on this article in the guardian:.

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  Splash

  Rain man? Elephant man? 50 first dates? Monty Python having men play women?
  I also remember Sigourney Weaver playing an agorophobic.

  Where do you draw the line?

  Actors act. It's not 'toxic' in my opinion.
• 
  16

  Eyebrows up!... Eyebrows down!...

  by Splash in

  1. social
  2. humour

  today... i'm going to talk to you..... about "sisters!!".

  now our dear sisters... have a place ... in god's organisation.

  they are not permitted to teach!.

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  Splash

   Welcome!

   Today... I'm going to talk to you....

   About "sisters!!"

   Now our dear sisters... have a place ... in God's organisation

   They are NOT permitted to teach!

   And they really mustn't gossip!

   But they ARE allowed to look pretty.

   Are you sisters doing all you can... To look pretty?

    Jehovah wants you to look pretty

  
   And so do the Governing Body!

   We especially like to see your ankles... As Isa 52:7 says... "How comely are the ankles of those bringing good news".

   Therefore, the Governing Body... will soon be appointing... an Ankle Overseer in each congregation

   We know... you dear sisters will work along... with this new arrangement

  
   It would not be proper... to resist the direction... of Jehovah's glorious chariot.

   So willingly submit... and get those goddam ankles out!

   Erm... I mean... Humble yourselves... before Jehovah God.

   And let your light shine before all old men, Oops, I mean "all men".

   HEY, YOU OVER THERE!!!! ARE YOU VIDEOING THIS???

   Yeah, what of it?

   Well F**** you
  
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  23

  Putin the Pressure Up!

  by snare&racket in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  http://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/feb/05/nato-rapid-reaction-force-counter-russia-ukraine.

  http://www.forbes.com/sites/kenrapoza/2015/02/08/russia-investors-on-war-watch-wednesday/.

  http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/ukraine/11397924/ukraine-crisis-europe-and-us-debate-how-to-handle-russia-live.html.

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  Splash

  NATO should start flying planes all over his borders.
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  31

  The WBATS has officially become a Fortune 500 company they are going public Monday buy your shares soon while they LAST!!!

  by ADJUSTMENTS in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  with the recent leak and viewing of the elders video on the new standard construction kingdumb halls the rank & file brobots have officially become employees of a billion dollar publishing and now real estate company, equipped with 7 ceo's and many businessmen as shrewd and as money hungry as any rival fortune 500 company.. the new kingdumb halls look like (i have to give it to them) expertly designed commercial properties that any major office, restuarant or commercial leasing company would package as a ultra versatile space!!!

  the old kingdumb halls where a tough resale to the general public because of the custom designing aspects of the old kingdumb halls.

  they have completely done away with that issue with these new versatile properties which can be converted to an office/restaurant/repair garage/clinic.

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  Splash

  Stephen Lett tells us the 5 things we should do to help this arrangement. In order:

  1. Simplify your lives so you can volunteer

  2. Encourage others to do the same

  3. Contribute monetarily

  4. Keep preaching

  5. Pray for this arrangement

  Also... has anyone noticed... that Stephen Lett pauses... after every few words... which makes him sound... like a condescending buffoon.

  I can't think of anyone else... who, try as they may... come across as so incredibly insincere... and ill equipped... to appear on camera... addressing millions.